


Alone Made Of Ice

by AllThoseSirens



Category: Red Dead Redemption (Video Games)
Genre: English isn't my native tongue, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, I'm very much in love with them both, Let the journey begin, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-19
Updated: 2019-10-25
Packaged: 2020-07-08 22:36:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 74,831
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19877200
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AllThoseSirens/pseuds/AllThoseSirens
Summary: Since the incident in Ambarino, Sadie Adler was a different woman. Fire heated her veins, streamed hot through these and replaced her juice of life. Sadie got her revenge. Colm who was hanged before her eyes and the fat man with the beard, who Sadie had taken down by hand. With Arthur by her side, she had teached them O'Driscolls to shoot. But therefore he wanted Sadies word. That, when the time comes, she will watch over the Marston family. Sadie was a woman of her word. After Abigails rescue and the escape from Van Horn, Sadies promise was demanded. Hunted by the Pinkertons, the two women must flee. Caught between cold and heat.





	1. Prologue - "If The Time Comes"

**Author's Note:**

> First of all, english isn't my native tongue, and I apologize for my mistakes. I hope you can look over it and it makes no big of a difference. Besides that there isn't much to say. Except for: Enjoy reading! :)

Prologue “If the time comes”

His words rang loud in her head. A farewell, without doubt. The signs were clearer than the crows, which flew on the horizon. 

So that's it. Everyone of them had worked towards it. A sudden end. 

The worst of all? Nobody could have done anything about it. 

Maybe it wasn't so bad in the end. Without an option, they were forced into their long written faith. Fell in the rolls they were made to be. Everything else was a lie.

But why did they made it so far? Why Arthur had to die? 

He had lived his very own story. Which took an sudden end. Haunted by old ghosts. 

Everyone in camp noticed. His well being was getting worse. An illness. Tuberculosis, he said, his cough bad, Miltons gaping look directed at him. The confident of victory written all over his face. 

As long as Sadie breathed she knew one thing, she wouldn't bow to a damn Pinkerton just as little as to a mangy O'Driscoll.

Even if she had lost everything what had a meaning to her. And once again everything seemed to be cursed. She was still alive, Abigail was still with her, hands clutched on her belt, so she won't lose the hold on the horse. 

Arthur had told them, where Tilly would wait for them together with Jack in safety. 

It was not far anymore. A little ride. Between the trees which seemed to almost endlessly run over the landscape, the sun announced the late afternoon and yielded from the sky like a curtain, which closed to let the stars have their gig in the darkness. 

Their path led them through a small village named Butchers Creek. Sadie had once set foot on this area and avoided it ever since. Not a place she would volunteer to stay longer. Full of strange figures. Probably harmless and more of a danger to itself. Believe in strange things and deal with the smallest superstition. If you stick to one's own kind there was apparently not much exciting to experience and you fled into a shitload of mischief. At least Sadie saw it that way. Or they were simply stupid enough, to confuse a mutt with a demon.

But Sadie hadn't dealt with the little folk long enough to make a judgment.

All that she knew was that Butchers Creek was parallel to Van Horn and their destination to Copperhead Landing was getting closer.

She had consciously decided to avoid the main roads. Even now she tried to maneuver her horse through the trees, to shake of any pursuer. They may had lost the Pinkertons for a while now, but that wasn't an assurance. Even far away from it. The pack tough, hard on it to finish them all off. 

Sadie was glad she had Abigail with her and to know her in safety. She had Abigail before her eyes, how she was tied up in front of her. Cheeks flushed and an ice cold gaze at Milton, before her eyes widened, as Sadie burst through the door. Blind with anger, Sadie had raised her revolver and directed it at Milton. She had no second left, because his men already had a grab on Sadie and tied her up with a grin on their faces, knowing their reward had doubled. 

Even the strained tugging on the rope, which held her wrists and ankles together, brought nothing but sore reddened skin. As if on command, she felt a burn at the thought of it where the rope had cut into her skin. 

But that was over. They could safely flee. Milton was dead. Abigail was at her side and Arthur... Arthur was a hero. The best man she had known. He had sacrificed himself for them all. Now it was up to them to take that chance.

Meanwhile the picture changed, the bushes and big trees were left behind them. From their point of view even the water could be recognized. The last rays of sunlight flashed tired over the water and were absorbed again and again by the laughing waves of the river. In the distance appeared the view of open land, barely protected from prying eyes. Randomly a few bushes stretched across the lousy country. The ground was mushy. Here and there broken trunks stuck out of the ground, already swallowed by the heat. A light mist slowly drifted across the lake and would condense during the evening. 

When the midday sun stood it became unbearably humid, around 100 degrees. Sadie was glad, that the night fell in and the temperature dropped. In less than an hour it would have cooled further to 70 degrees. 

Birds gathered at the edge of the shore. Colorful specimens that gave color to the desolate landscape. The great alligators, who were also on the shore, didn't seem to care. Copperhead Landing was on the edge within the limits of Lemoyne. An area where it was swarming with alligators. Right next to the swamps. Not a really welcoming place for travelers. There they should be safe for the moment. 

Not too long ago, Lemoyne was their sanctuary. Between bad alligators, awful weather and a plethora of insects. Humans as well as animals. Shady Belle offered the gang since Colter a real roof over the heads. Instead of the freezing cold, however, they had to struggle with unbearable heat. Most people probably had difficulty deciding which was better. Sadie had spent her last years up in the mountains. The answer was clear. 

But if she caught herself thinking about it, she became hard-conscious that maybe the answer was different than she believed. 

Shady Belle was alright. Bad was Lakay. Hidden deep in the swamps. Stiff, stagnant air. Unbearable. They didn't have another choice at the time. The gangs men had left for Saint Denis to go through a bank robbery. That day, they lost Hosea and Lenny. Life as an outlaw had its risks. Everyone was aware of that. 

The rest had managed to escape. Arthur, Dutch, Micah, Bill and Javier, all of them were well. But that day, they did not come back to Shady Belle. Their escape had put them on a boat, which shipped the gentlemen to Guarma.

At that time, things got hot in Shady Belle. The gang had left their mark all over the place. The Pinkertons continued to search for them. The burglary in Saint Denis was just a mistake of many. But Shady Belle lacked some firepower. It would have been too daring to stay there longer than necessary and to wait for the return of the men. Before more could go wrong the remaining ones grabbed their belongings and fled further into the swamp. Sadie knew how to handle her revolver well and took care of enough security, together with Charles. They were able to live there for a few days undamaged. Soon after, the lost men reappeared and the Pinkertons alike. A wild shootout, Sadie loved the thrill, the rattle of the drum and the screeching revolvers.

Once again it took Sadie to the swamps, although she hated it so much and in the bitter awareness, what happened and went wrong. The swamps. Most people avoided such areas and only stayed on the main roads to avoid snake bites. That was the advantage as well as disadvantage. In such places also grew tons of stories. The scary night folk were one of many. But the women were far out of reach. 

Sadie looked up. A small, sunken hut graced the flat land, only a skeleton of itself. To the left of it stretched a jetty across the water, far more intact than the hut. Sadie was last there when she left with Arthur to save John from the gallow. Right there on the little jetty, which built over the water, climbed by ghosts of the past, Sadie sat ready with her riffle, waiting for Arthur to join them, while Abigail talked to her. Suddenly it seemed years ago when Sadie was there. So much has happened.

“There they are!” Abigail sounded relieved. Sadie knew, how hard it was for Abigail to be in uncertainty, not knowing if Jack was well. She could imagine how she had spent the whole ride thinking about his well-being. Whether Tilly had made it with Jack or if the Pinkertons were clever enough to intercept them. In the last months they have learned too much how fast something could go wrong. And Abigail had lost her son before. She knew the pain. She feared the pain. Sadie could tell by her looks. It had been a couple of rough days back then. As good as Sadie could be, she was there for Abigail. But the common mornings, where they stood together by the fire and drank their coffee, were not the same anymore. An expression of sadness dominated Abigail's face and gave way to no one else. Her eyes spoke of many sleepless nights. And when she was sleeping, she was plagued by nightmares. Abigail never mentioned it, but Sadie could hear her. Sadie had a light sleep after the events in Colter. She woke up several times during the night, the smallest sounds made her startle and squint at her revolver, that it was in the holster at hand. Since that one night, she was ready for anything. Always. 

The schemes that formed before them didn't escape Sadie either, black outlines, kissed by the evening twilight. One obviously bigger than the other. That could only be Jack and Tilly. Or an aligned trap. Before Sadie could lose herself in this thought, she spurred the horse. 

Luck was on her side. No further nasty surprises waiting for her. In fact, it was Tilly and Jack who made it to Copperhead Landing unscathed. The relief was literally written on Abigail's face, without hesitation, she pulled her son in her embrace. Shortly thereafter she gave Tilly a thankful look, her lips silently formed into a thank you. 

Sadie dropped a small load off her shoulders. Everyone was well. They made it to there. Nevertheless, she felt a pressure. How much time was credited to them, she didn't know. Her instinct told her that the bastards were after them. After all, they had killed more than a dozen Pinkertons before they escaped. Sadie wanted to be damned if the agents let that sit on themselves. 

Milton had raised his weapon before he died. After warnings. Warnings that were ignored by the gang. Loyal they stood behind Dutch. He had a plan. Nobody came up with the idea to turn away and hand over Dutch to the detective agency. Rather, they would all have died. A touching story about assistance. Moral in one's own family, a gang of outlaws that had joined forces and lived for each other, as with each other. For the wealth they would get. For all that and more. Now they were separated or dead. Dutch had gone insane. 

Every day was tough, a fight for survival. No sooner had they believed themselves safe, than the next camp was cleared by order of Dutch. It was no longer a rarity. Living free and independent of the rules, as outlaws, had its price. Everyone had to ask themselves if it was worth it. On the run from the government. A few months ago, it was just a feeling, a dark shadow sitting on their necks. But now it was much more than that. Hunted, a split pack, vulnerable from every side. They used to stand up for each other, no matter what shit they had gotten into. 

The 19th century was coming to an end. The cities gradually filled with people who were heading west. People with dreams. The civilization grew uninterrupted. Including the rules. Obedience should be the new trend. The-Van-Der-Linde-Gang, however, stood firm and counteracted. Three states were after the gang. Probably more now. Sadie didn't want to know. They will probably spend a lot of time avoiding bounty hunters or shooting their heads. Sadie wanted to be damned if she let such guys get her. But they had to be careful of the Pinkertons. 

An unpleasant feeling told Sadie that they would have to flee very soon. A waiting farewell. Again. The men knew Sadie's face and that of Abigail. Tilly was almost invisible to the detective agency, she wasn't picked up yet and had the chance to escape. Jack would be safe with her. But in the care of two hunted women? Questionable. Now it was up to Sadie to prepare Abigail for it. To leave her son one more time behind. Even if they had their rest now, how long would it take for the agents to get on track? Sadie had no problems with throwing herself in risky situations. Since joining the gang, it has been one of her favorite activities and even then, most men were inferior to her. Her gun was her best friend.

But Sadie would not put Jack in danger and Abigail, as much as she wanted her Jack with her, was not allowed too. It not only made Jack vulnerable, but also Abigail and thus Sadie. If John actually... Then Sadie couldn't risk any of them being endangered. Jack needed his mother, but before, they had to make sure that their reputation status wouldn't endanger them and Sadie knew she had to convince Abigail. 

Meanwhile the women had sat down in front of the sunken hut for a rest. The dark wood had certainly been moldering for months. What story might hide behind the sunken remains of this wooden hut? Certainly some people occasionally came by here, be it drunkards who had nothing better to do or poor sobs, who were again put on the doorstep by their wife, because they didn't get their nose out of the booze. Old rusty cans lay scattered across the floor. Next to it are old liquor bottles and scorched earth, which once served as a fireplace. A small trunk was in front of it, a sitting possibility. Only Tilly used these. Most of the time her eyes wandered over the lake, building up in front of them. They all knew that the journey would continue soon. The lake calmly reflected the moonlight. Everything seemed quiet. As if there were no dangers to be feared. Only the beauty of the night. A clear sky full of stars. Endless stories reflected on them. 

The soft crackling of the fire was like a lullaby to Sadie. Her eyes were burning. The sleep was missing. Her eyes wandered wearily over her comrades' faces which were lit by the flames, animated by the old wood of the hut. Only Jack was asleep. He lay peacefully next to Abigail, who brushed her fingers reassuringly through his hair. For a long time now they had fallen into silence. The women's eyes told Sadie, that they needed to be as tired as she was. 

Tilly had told them that she had made it to Copperhead Landing smoothly. That Arthur had told her to wait there. Arthur. The faces of the two other women must have been enough, because Tilly's gaze lowered and her expression petrified. Sadie and Abigail couldn't speak, just stood there before Abigail gently put a hand on Tilly's shoulder. Sadie could see a tear drop from her cheek and fall to the ground. She swallowed hard at the thought of how it might have happened. 

Shortly thereafter, they had set the fire. Their conversations were nothing but short sentences. Every word was heavy on the tongue. Abigail had Jack close to her all the time, as if she was afraid that if she let him go, he would disappear again. As if she knew that Sadie wouldn't let Jack travel with them. Seeing Abigail and Jack like that gave her a guilty conscience. Even if she meant well. One shouldn't separate a mother from her child. But it was safer that way. What else would be left for them?

Sadie would make sure Abigail returned, so she could embrace her son once again before she would never have to leave him again. Because they could do it, outsmart the Pinkertons and live a life in the open. The gang was past. Now it were Abigail, Jack and Tilly. Each of them had earned their happy end to the story. They would meet again soon.

\--

Sadie had been waiting for the right moment. But the longer she waited and stared into the fire, the more she realized that there wouldn't be a right moment. Abigail should leave her son with Tilly. She would understand. For securitiy purposes. Sadie cleared her throat softly before she spoke. 

"We have to move on soon," she said, pausing for a moment. “And I think it's better for Jack to stay with Tilly." Sadie's eyes went to Abigail's and held her eyes. For a moment Sadie thought the woman would approach her, asking how she could come up with such ideas and expect such things. Inwardly, Sadie had even prepared for it.

"I know," she said to Sadie's surprise. Sad eyes and slow words. Abigail must have been aware of the risk and probably hadn't thought about anything else for the last half hour. Sadie was tired of how much certainty these words contained. Everything in her wanted to jump up and tackle it, Jack would come with them and they would manage anyway. But Sadie knew better. Instead, she nodded to Abigail, her eyes wandering once more into the merciless flames that once had taken from her as much as the O'Driscolls themselves.

\-- 

The afflicted mood lay like a dome over the present ones. Every movement seemed dumbfounded and unfamiliar. But each one knew what she had to do. The upcoming farewell and the associated separation. Depressed, Sadie poked at the remnants of the flames, dusty embers reflected in her eyes. Her eyes dropped. She took a deep breath, as if preparing for something big. What might be true. Then Sadie trudged with her boots into the glowing remains until they finally went out.

Meanwhile, Tilly had piloted Abigail to her horse. Before Tilly said anything, Sadie saw what she wanted to show. Money. And a lot of that. One more thing they owed to Arthur. After the robbery, he had given it to Tilly. Without a second thought. Because they would need it. For a moment Sadie stopped what she was doing. Once again Arthur saved their asses. The man knew what he was doing. A sigh had formed on Sadie's lips, only audible for her. The memories flooded her again. But Sadie could not afford it, nor did she have time to mourn. She pushed it away, her footsteps heading for Tilly and Abigail.

“He was a good man.” Sadie voiced her previous thought aloud. Tilly's eyes widened slightly before she nodded heavily. Her hands clutched a sack of money. Sadie estimated around five hundred dollars.

“You will need it.”


	2. Inner Demons

The dark night sky lurked like a hunting wildcat over the heads of the fleeing women. In a few hours, tomorrow would come. Only a few minutes ago, the paths had separated. Miss Tilly and Jack had parted with them at the main path. From there it went for Tilly and Jack south, towards Saint Denis.

Abigail had been worried, because in this city once lived the man who had kidnapped her son. Sadie knew the story, how it ended for Bronte. Dutch had mercilessly fed him to the alligators, after he had let him taste the water from the swamps. Sadie didn't feel pity. This guy deserved it. The cruel way of dying was just a little extra that he truly deserved with his deeds. A treacherous dog. 

None of the men would dare to touch Jack again, let alone keep an eye on him. They had provided plenty for that. If one of them still lived there at all. Now certainly other guns were driven up in the city. Other men eager to seize the city and with their machinations they were allowed to feel at least a small part of the power that they desired, like nothing else.

Saint Denis was no more dangerous than any other city. Everywhere lurked a lot of scum, just waiting to crawl out of their holes at the right moment to strike. Sadie had seen it all. Gangs, real clans, like the Grays and Braithwaites, or single free-spirits. Free-spirits, who had their heads full of shit.

Families who waged wars and did not shrink from killing those who stood in their way. But that didn't distinguish her from other people. Sadie couldn't blame them. So she herself had become a murdering woman, driven by an unleashed rage she surrendered herself to. 

It was a hard life that she had chosen, but life has always been hard. After all, Sadie had lived before the gang on a farm in Colter. Every day she was greeted by cold temperatures and snow. The white landscape stretched over miles and miles. The next town was almost half a day's ride away. It didn't take many up there. Mostly hikers in transit. Less common hunters. However, Sadie had heard that some hunters swore by the games in the mountains and gladly accepted this effort. Sadie didn't care, they should think what they wanted. Next, they would believe in a metal-built human being who could magically move.

All things which were not worth believing. She lived in the here and now and there was the essential. At the time, it was the land she needed to take care of despite the ongoing blizzards. Jake and Sadie shared the work in the beginning. Whether it was about the horses, the household or the hunt for fresh game. As mentioned, Jake was a good man and he respected all her choices. Even if she got upset again and made a decision too fast with a clouded mind. That's what Sadie liked about him. This man had fallen in love with the woman who Sadie was. Who she really was. Even if the world had no mercy, they had created their own little paradise. Surrounded by the constant white. But it was simply taken away from Sadie. Without that Sadie could do something about it. No mercy.

Several months had passed since then. The pain was still present, but she had slowly learned to handle it. The women had taken her well then and met her in her hardest time with understanding. Even when Sadie threw insults at them, raging in her grief. It meant more to her than she would ever admit to the other ladies. But Sadie had the feeling that every one of them knew. By God, they were women who had gone through the shit themselves. Just like Sadie. She wasn't alone. No one went through the camp without his demons. The late nights under the open sky told her. Tired, exhausted faces marked by past events. Lose mouths under the influence of rum, which gave more price than they would otherwise. Sadie preferred to pull back. No rum. One cigarette at most. If she needed time for herself again, she would grab her rifle, a beautiful Carbine Repeater. 

She used to live as a broken woman in a camp full of free spirits. Together with people who wanted to give their lives a new meaning and fled from the law. People who took what they needed in one way or another. It was not always right, but it was necessary to make ends meet. Honest work was only found in the camp. The daily chopping wood, so that the fire burned, or the washing up, as well as the washing of the inhabitants. Pearson, who prepared new meals every day. And Sadie must let him, even if this man got on her nerves terribly, he made up for it with his cooking skills. All the tasks that had to be mastered daily. 

Sadie was glad she didn't have to spend all day cutting vegetables. It might be Pearson's destiny and overrode him with all the happiness, but Sadie didn't want to restrict herself to this duty. This old troll got on her nerves and if Arthur had not intervened that day, she would have hounded him down by hand. Since she was in Rhodes with Arthur that day, she felt better. Not only because she didn't constantly face the hacking face of Pearson, but because the people in the camp were slowly coming to see her true self. She could finally unfold. A gun was better in her hand than the knife with which she would have decapitated Pearson first, even before the vegetables.

Sadie spared no effort. But she couldn't stand spending all day cutting vegetables. So she was more than happy that she could keep watch with her own rifle. There was no Pearson either, who was always giving her trivial instructions.

Despite everything, Sadie found herself more in the small community every day. A new family.  
Through these people Sadie had something to fight for. These people enjoyed the traits of freedom. Sadie knew what it was like to be free.  
Who could have guessed that this all ended too quickly?  
Since Sadie left Colter, there was no continuity. She could only rely on that. 

Like many other things, they were swallowed by time. Forced to go on, no matter what. Before the dead overtook them all. One earlier, the other later. But they were still alive. Sometimes Sadie wondered herself, how she made it so far. 

Carefully, in the distance, behind the hill, a few houses formed, pointing to something like a city. A ranch. The Emerald ranch. A few tired lights shone from far away. Sadie had not often moved to this place, she didn't know much about it. The people worked here, like everyone else, for a roof over their heads. They probably had a family relationship, nothing out of the ordinary, not on a ranch anyway. 

Sadie remembered a story that Arthur had told her after he came from one of his wanderings. He had met a real lion at this place, so he said. Amused, he revealed that he thought he was tracking a dog. A cheater who disguised and painted his animals and sold them on the stage as predators. The animals had probably escaped him and Arthur should catch them again. The lion had almost torn his head off - not to mention the shock when he realized it was not just a disguised dog. With such a story Sadie couldn't keep up with the best will.  
They laughed a lot together that evening.

But they were here, in the present. And Sadie didn't know where they were going. Just go west. The next town that lay in the direction was Valentine. Maybe that was fine, because they lacked supplies. With the money Tilly had given them, they could provide more than enough. It was probably over an hour from the ranch. Although Sadie's eyes were burning and her muscles were as tired as she was, she refused to even think about taking a break. Abigail might as well, her hands were little more than a loose grip on Sadie's belt.

Sadie spurred the horse before it would break tomorrow, leaving them a few miles behind. The big farmhouse spoke of wealth. No lights were burning anymore. From the window you could see the women disappearing behind the hills. The stars were high in the sky. Today there was no storm, which occurred more often in the heartlands. That would delight the workers.

Sadie and Abigail left the ranch behind. The whole further ride over Sadie's thoughts wandered to the silhouette on the window, which was vaguely outlined in the window frame, but recognizable enough in the moonlight to see that it was a young woman. A curious pair of eyes had fixed on the travelers until they were no longer in sight.

\--

Large, white mountains adorned the horizon. Even at night, you could see the snow glowing like a huge signpost. It wasn't far anymore, less than a mile. Then they would reach Valentine. Sadie did not know how much time was credited to them. Whether they could afford the luxury of waiting until the shops opened to provide necessary food. Or whether they should go for the next city. 

The first buildings came into view. Lights were visible. Slowly the early morning broke in. A few more hours, then the sun would slowly make its way up. The first birds would find their commitment and chirp happily to themselves. Not to mention the whine of the cock. Then the company would find the city and would bring it back to life.

The streets were as good as empty, here and there a Marauder, a man who once again sought his way out of the saloon to his home. The climate was pleasant, but Sadie was overcome by a small shiver. Her stomach growled, her muscles were burning and her eyes fighting fatigue.

Sadie felt Abigail's hand settle on her shoulder. 

"Sadie, we should take a break. We're tired. The horse is exhausted. A small break. Strengthened we are faster." Abigail's voice was rough, dulled by lack of sleep, and sounded unfamiliar to Sadie's ears. Since they left, neither had said a word.

Sadie knew Abigail was right. So she surrendered to her words. Abigail had earned a break. A warm, decent meal. Maybe a bath. But most of all, a bed. Even on Sadie the thought seemed inviting. She was used to sleeping on wooden floorboards, even in sitting. All this didn't bother Sadie. The luxury of the most natural things she had filed months ago. But even the most modest woman could be tempted.

Wordlessly, Sadie directed Bob outside the hotel She swung off her horse and offered Abigail her hand as a support before she tied the reins to the Palatinate.  
Columns carried the canopy, which also served as a balcony. Above it, in large letters, was the name of the house. Saints Hotel. Welcome to the dirt, Sadie thought.

In addition to the usual stench of horse dung on the streets, an old cloud of smoke hit them as Sadie pushed the door open and made a lovely mixture that made Sadie's nose go up. Behind the counter, Sadie spotted a man's head, half sunk in it he sat on the chair, his feet were stretched across the counter and greeted the incoming ladies. At the bottom of his boots was the dried mud collected from the streets and crumbled on the dark wood. Accompanied by his loud breath, Sadie stepped in front of the bar. Sadie patted him on the shaft of his boots, hard. He was startled out of his sleep with a grunt escaping his mouth and fought for balance for a moment. 

When his eyes fell on the women, he realized what was happening around him. His expression broke briefly, his eyebrows twitched down and spoke of resentment before he remembered and his expression gave way to a friendly one. A self-righteous smile crept on Sadie's lips.

"Ladies, how can I help you?" His words sounded almost sincere. Sadie's eyes fixed on his full mustache. It wasn't hard to see that he had eaten before he took his nap. A few remnants had caught at the corners of his mouth to the beard.

"Appetizing …," Sadie mumbled to herself.

A questioning look met her. "How was that, miss?"

"A room please I said." Like at the touch of a bottom an attached smile played on Sadie's lips. "And it's Mrs.," she added. Out of the corner of her eye, Sadie could see that Abigail was pinching a laugh, her hand covered her mouth and she feigned a hawk so as not to betray herself. 

When he turned his head a strand of hair came loose from his combed back hair and fell playfully over his wrinkled forehead. The host's gaze shifted skeptically between the two ladies. But he could not make any sense to the whole, exhaled audibly and rummaged loudly in a drawer in front of him.

"The room has just become vacant, so you can count yourself lucky." He held out the key and nodded encouragingly. The two women exchanged a look. When he noticed that, he added, "We don't have any more. I'm sorry." His expression reflected his impatience. He probably wanted to get rid of both of them and finally return to his sleep. Then he would eventually be relieved of his shift and dangle like a mangy dog home, where his wife was already waiting for him. He would come in the door and, as so often, complain that there was no meal on the table, and she would admit that he obviously had already eaten, judging from his beard, and there was no reason for a fight.

The idea aroused almost a pity in Sadie. Sighing, she reached for the key and threw him some coins on the counter.

"Above, the first one on the right." At his word, Sadie handed the key to Abigail and sent her ahead.

Sadie saw his bony fingers embrace the coins and literally saw him use his brain to calculate. His eyes lit up as he realized that Sadie had given him more than necessary and he pocketed the leftover money quickly. For Sadie, he offered an amusing spectacle. She made another noticeable knock on the wooden wall.

"That should be more than enough for you to let my companion have a hot bath." A mischievous grin crept into Sadie's face. The expression on his face was gold value. Maybe Sadies would give him some extra coins later. If he behaved, of course. 

"Of course, Mrs." His head bowed ashamed, as if Sadie had just caught him playing on himself. Sadie nodded to him before she picked the stairs and couldn't help to stop herself from laughing anymore. Amused, she stepped through the assigned room door, where Abigail was already vigorously picking the bed apart. Her facial expressions changed in a second to the other in an astonished expression. The blanket lay across the floor and Sadie almost got the pillow thrown in her face while she let the whole thing sink in on her.

"Heads up, Abigail." Sadie's words made Abigail look up.

"Sorry, I didn't hear you come in." Abigail gave Sadie an apologetic smile.

Immediately she fumbled on around the bed. Her slender fingers grabbed the mattress and heaved it up with a little effort. Sadie eyed the spectacle with curiosity before it won the upper hand.

"What are you doing here?" Sadie asked her companion, raising an eyebrow.

"I don't want to know who has slept here. That's my way of approaching it a bit,"Abigail told her with a satisfied smile. Sadie struggled to suppress her laughter. 

"I don't want to know how many others came up with this idea before you," she replied, before she laughed loudly. Abigail wanted to say something, but her mouth only formed mute words. Her hands found their way to her hips, paused for a moment before burying her face in them. Sadie had found her way to Abigail, but before she could speak, Abigail raised her head.

"I don't believe it!" Now she laughed too and slapped Sadie on the stomach with the back of her hand.

"Do not worry, that will stay with us." Sadie grinned. Abigail shook her head in amusement.

A knock on the door followed, and shortly thereafter the innkeeper stuck his head through the crack and announced the prepared bath. When he disappeared, Sadie looked at Abigail patiently until she noticed that. The questioning, uncertain look that Abigail gave her could only make her look cute. Sadie would never have admitted that though.

"Your water is getting cold," Sadie said, as if nothing was happening.

"You mean that's for me?" Abigail concluded.

Sadie knew she was a smart girl. Even if it wasn't recognizable right now. But Sadie loved to have some fun with Abigail. The two had known each other for several months now. Months that had welded them together. The life out there was hard, the deeper was the bond with the people with whom this life was shared. Not to mention all the shit that happened around them. Without a break, every second. It felt good to just be in the moment and live it, to put the worries aside and to joke somewhat lost in thought. All too soon, the real world would catch up with them. The ongoing struggle for survival could wait a few moments.

\--

Sadie had eventually convinced Abigail to take her bath. It was little more than a little back and forth of words. Insignificant. Importantly, Abigail had finally given way. A hot bath was no miracle cure for deep-seated pain. But it was a small way to relax a little. Let go. With a heavy heart, Sadie thought of John. Little Jack. Both were no longer with Abigail. Sadie knew that John was a tough dog and he had already survived a lot. This guy probably had more than seven lives. The only thing he was wearing were scars. One deeper than the other. But Sadie could not tell if John was okay or if he had really caught it this time. Either he was dead, the Pinkertons had caught him and the gallows was already waiting for him or he was on the run and did his best to find Abigail and Jack.

Sadie had to admit that this time, the probability was very low. A shiver ran down her spine at the thought of it. She knew all too well how it felt to lose a loved one. Just snatched away. Without the power to do something about it. The only consolation was that time would pass and the gaping wound would eventually become a pale scar.  
Abigail's face as Arthur told her what had happened and the tears on her cheeks floated in front of Sadie's inner eye. The expression in her face, full of pain and fear.

Her footsteps led her out of the room. It was not Sadie's intention. No thought crossed Sadie's head, only the feeling of unspoken pain. A feeling of drowning. She did not even knock, just pushed the door open, careful not to scare anyone.

The room was lit by candlelight. Black shadows danced on the walls and animated the room. Gave her company.  
Sadie stood in the room, but free from all spatiality. Her eyes fixed on the tub. The person who took a bath there. Abigail.  
As if in a trance, her eyes wandered over Abigail's back, up to her shoulders and the hair she now wore open and stuck wet on her body. The water shone on her skin, sparkling in the candlelight like little diamonds. A woman created from the most precious raw material.  
Abigail had not heard her come in. Or had she?

Sadie's lips were slightly open, but she was breathing out of her nose. She swallowed and moistened her suddenly dry lips. Her eyes burned again, but it was not the tiredness. In front of her was Abigail, running her hand gently over her arms and shoulders. As they moved, the water rippled, breaking the silence that suddenly became oppressive.

Suddenly, Sadie realized where she was, what she was doing. Sharply, she sucked in her breath, as if Sadie were frightened by herself. What had just got into her?

As if on command, Abigail waved her head in Sadie's direction. Her head tilted, wondering, but not afraid. Her soft features were framed by the warm light of the candle and showed Sadie how beautiful the young lady was in front of her. Her open hair embraced cheek and jaw, a whole new image was revealed to Sadie. Never before had she seen Abigail with her hair open, even though they had known each other for some time and lived together. Sadie knew she had to say something, she really did. What the hell was she doing there? 

The two stared at each other, none ready, or able to say anything. The reality had already fallen on Sadie, the fog in her head gradually dissolved and words began to form.

"I'm sorry, Abigail. I just wanted to know if you're okay ... with all that." Sadie made an all-encompassing move. “I didn't mean to...” Her voice cracked. 

"No, Sadie, it's alright. Do not worry. Please. I appreciate your concern." Abigail met her with an understanding smile.

"I think I'll get something to eat for both of us." Sadie just wanted it to end. As she spoke, she pointed to the door, embarrassed, and took her first steps backwards, before she turned completely around and fled.

As the door slammed shut behind her with an audible click, it was like a blow back to life. The seconds passed again at a normal pace. Was it the haze that was in the air and that had clouded her brain? Sadie found no answer to this question.

Her path led her down the stairs, still caught in her thoughts in the previous scenario. She had heard what Abigail had said. But Sadie could not help but wonder what the dark-haired thought. Her smile had been a charming one, one that should teach her that Sadie really shouldn't worry, and that Abigail understood her intentions. Sincerely. 

Back in Horseshoe Overlook, it was Abigail who was there for Sadie. The gang had migrated from the snow-covered Colter to the Heartlands, a region in New Hanover, and settled there.

Nothing more than a broken woman was left over from Sadie. The pain literally consumed her from within. A hole from which she could never escape, a slope in front of their eyes, without the possibility to turn over. Bitter agony.

Her whole life had changed to ashes and blood before her eyes.  
Sadie was alive. But she felt after all else but that. A walking shell. For Sadie, there was only that burning pain in her veins that replaced her juice of life. 

She usually spent her days at the stone in front of the cliff. Her eyes traveled hundreds of times over this slope. If only she was not so cowardly …  
Again and again the tears overcame her which she couldn't hold back any longer. Her vision blurred, blurring everything that was in front of her, until she blinked and everything was still the same. Nothing would ever be the same again. No one could bring her back to her Jakey. Nobody.

So she sat there, lingering in her loneliness, only her and her tears, her hat drawn deep in the face. While the sun was up in the sky and literally smiled. The birds in the trees chirped happily to each other and the light wind breeze laughed through her hair.  
Sadie couldn't have imagined a more inappropriate picture. But that's how it was.

She did not mind being left alone with her worries, the women had already heard enough of her howling. Sadie would not blame them if they were fed up.

But Abigail .. She didn't let up. More than once Miss Roberts had sat down to comfort her.  
Sadie had simply told her. Expressing her dearest wish and giving it words that darted bitterly over her tongue, her voice fragile and rough.

“It just takes time, Mrs. Adler.” Abigail said.

“I wish... I wish they would have killed me too.” - “I know” - “I wish it every goddamned day.” - “I know.” Abigail was sitting on the rock beside her, but Sadie's eyes were buried in the grass in front of her. The woman had turned to her, resting her hand comfortingly on her shoulder blade and even without looking at Abigail, Sadie could see her compassionate gaze and the little wrinkles that formed between her eyebrows when she was worried. “You know if... I had any courage, if I wasn't so damn weak... I'd kill myself too.” Sadie literally felt Abigail's eyes run down her face, trying to read from her face.

“We both know that ain't true. We both know that bravery is in the living.” Abigail's words radiated strength. Sadie knew that Abigail was right. But her feeling screamed against it. Nevertheless, Sadie raised her head and looked at Abigail, who steadfastly returned her gaze. “I-I don't know you very well, but I can tell you're brave. Mrs. Adler, I really can.” It sounded genuinely from Abigail's mouth. As if Sadie could really believe her. Because Abigail knew. 

But the vortex in Sadie's inner showed her a completely different side. A page Abigail could not see. As black as ink. Torn parchment, brittle, and dripping, where the ink filled these cracks. The black flowed unsustainably over the written paper and smeared what once was. 

“I don't seem very brave.”

“Nonsense. You're about the bravest woman I ever met...” Abigail leaned forward, emphatically, she rested her hand on Sadie's leg and her eyes searched Sadie's face under her hat. Sadie looked at her pretty, honest face. She put a lot of emotion into her voice, as well as her expression. This woman wanted to make Sadie believe. No. Let know. “And that tell me you got the courage... the courage to live.” 

“I hope so... I really do.” Sadie couldn't produce more. She was sobbing heavily, tears welling up. Abigail's hand had shifted to her elbow and patted it gently, caressing, as if Abigail did not want to scare Sadie, after what had happened.

“I know so... excuse me.” Silently, she spoke with complete assurance before she got up and offered Sadie her freedom.

Sadie had lowered her gaze to the ground again, her fingers intertwined. The steps died away. Unexpectedly, Abigail's voice broke the silence once more and made Sadie lift her head. “I'm always around if you need someone” Her voice sounded glum. After the words had left Abigail's mouth, Sadie's head dropped heavily and she surrendered herself to her demons.

At that time it was one of many conversations. But today Sadie saw it differently. This woman had actually got through to her. Imperceptibly she had crept in. Sadie was thankful for all this. Abigail was a woman who cared and to take care of the people around her. The two didn't even know each other well. 

Abigail became one of her closest confidants during this time, alongside Arthur. Two people who had become important to her. From which one was wrested from her again. From damned destiny. But not only Sadie suffered from this loss. Abigail knew him much longer than Sadie. How did the loss have to feel for her? Arthur. The entire gang.

Everything had changed. But it felt like yesterday, when they had gathered at one of many inflamed fires, drank beer and sang songs to it. She just had to come home and everyone would wait for them.

Suddenly that thought had died out. Time caught up with her and Sadie felt old and tired. As if she had experienced a leap in time. Everything seemed years ago. Forget that yesterday.

Her feet carried her down. As on autopilot, she ordered something to eat from the host. Before Sadie knew it, she was back in the room. She had sat down on the bed, her eyes fixed on the wall in front of her. After all that had happened that day, she felt weak. Almost numb inside.

Her stomach growled, but the hunger had evaporated.  
No sounds were heard in the room. Only the small floorboard spoke under Sadie's boots as she shifted her weight. Sadie felt connected to the small hall, so she felt as if she had to creak with each movement. Her muscles were tense and she longed for a moment's rest. Even alone in this room, it felt like anything but a break.

After dinner, she should go to sleep before the sun is up in the sky. After all, they could not risk staying longer than necessary. However, a little sleep would do them both good.

As if on cue, the door opened and Abigail scurried into the room. Her silent steps were only hinted at by her movement. A shy smile came to her lips as she caught Sadie's gaze.

There was a shimmer in Abigail's blue eyes, like on a surface of water. A splashing crept into Sadie's ears, one, as before, when she had surprised Abigail while bathing. And suddenly Sadie found herself confronted with the bathroom situation again.  
Uncontrolled, her eyes dropped from Abigail's face. In order not to appear conspicuous, Sadie devoted herself to her gun belt.

Without giving anything away, Sadie softly asked, "How are you feeling?"

Before Abigail could answer, they were interrupted by another knock on the door. Both heads turned in the direction where the man emerged. He had a tray with two plates on it carefully positioned. Including two glasses with a reddish liquid. Sadie couldn't remember ordering a wine.

Presumably he wanted to gain pluses after he had thought about it, that another tip was quite plausible, after the first was so generous. Who throws the money...

"Bon appetit, ladies." He wished, his eyes flickered to the wineglasses, and shortly afterwards his eyes met Sadie's, before disappearing again.

"Look at that one," Sadie said and took one of the wine glasses in her hand. Playfully, she circled it in her hand. "He seems to like you." Sadie winked at Abigail.

"Oh, stop it!" Abigail laughed, embarrassed. Sadie was pleased to be able to elicit her another smile, even in this tense time they were in. This woman knew to follow her own advice. She was still young, younger than Sadie, and had truly experienced and gained experience. Abigail did not give her grief, loss, the upper hand. Her strength was admirable.

Sadie would have been broken then. Sadie was broken. But she couldn't help wondering what she would have done in Abigail's place. An answer wouldn't came to her though. 

"After the bath is now relaxation option number two." Sadie handed Abigail one of the glasses. With a smile, Abigail took the wine, while Sadie did not miss the soft twinkle in her eyes.

Since the room offered no seating, except the bed, Sadie took the tray and sat on the floor in front of Abigail. With relish, Sadie took a sip of her wine. To her surprise she had to realize that it wasn't so bad. After all, they were in a traditional restaurant, Sadie had expected the cheapest bucket in the first place. The guy really wanted to see more of those shimmering coins. He proved himself to be a decent worker under the right wage.

"It's really good," Sadie commented. Abigail looked at her briefly with a raised eyebrow, before she slid off the edge of the bed and used this as a backrest. Her eyes examined the dish in front of her.

"Then it will probably work fine with the ... the food."

"That's lamb." Sadie took a fork from the meat, which was prepared with a nice vegetable side dish and tried a bite. The whole thing was rounded off with a sip of wine.

"Hmm, try it. Tastes great." Without hesitating, Abigail made sure and Sadie met her shifting face to realize that she was right.

"I didn't know you were a real gourmand, Sadie Adler." Sadie grunted and almost choked on the food.

"If you knew." Grinning, she raised her glass and took another sip of the red liquid. Abigail answered with an amused shake of her head. 

During the meal, the two caught themselves in further chitchat and experienced a boisterous meal. Sadie sensed that it would soon be serious again. A oppressive feeling sitting on her neck. But she wasn't deterred and used the time with Abigail as best she could to shut herself off. Because tomorrow was within reach.

But while eating, Sadie noticed the change in Abigail's face. A gentle brooding settled on her features. The small crease between Abigail's eyebrows drew Sadie's eye. She knew that her opposite was caught in her thoughts. The glint in her eyes gave way to a dull. Before Sadie could think about Abigail's staggering mood, she spoke up.

"Sadie ... I've thought about it. John and I had made a meeting at Owanjila Dam in case everything went wrong. And if there's a slim chance he's alive, then he'll wait for me there." Abigail didn't have to voice her concern directly, Sadie could easily get the message out of context. She knew what Abigail wanted to tell her.

The two women looked at each other for a while, it felt like minutes to Sadie, while she tried to read the young woman's face. Abigail remained steadfast and probably tried the same thing, judging by her gaze.

Suddenly, the wine on her tongue formed nothing but a bitter web that spread further and resembled the vile discomfort that slowly built up within her.

At that moment, Sadie knew that Abigail could tell. Clear. Because she jumped to her feet and threw her hands in a frustrated gesture in the air.

"What would you do? He is the father of my son!" Sadie eyed the upset woman in front of her with her lips open. Abigail retreated to the defensive, knowing that Sadie was unwilling to give in to her. She didn't even had to say something. "Then at least we have a plan. Where did we intend to hide until the air is clean? I feel their breath on my neck and it scares me!" Abigail's eyes searched Sadie, who was still sitting in front of her, silently examining Abigail.

What Abigail was right about was that they didn't have a plan. Blind on the run. Maybe an army in the back. As long as Sadie could hold her cattleman in hand, she'd take care of the bastards, for everything that was sacred to her. But she didn't want to answer for a presumably dead man.

"As you said, there is a slight chance that he is actually waiting there for you." Sadie initially made use of the interpretations of Abigail. But she knew that it was far from over.

“At least we have to try! If not us, then me. I'm sorry, Sadie." A snort escaped Sadie. As if she would allow that!

"Even if the possibility came into force, have you thought about it that even the dogs of the detective agency could wait there for us? A good ol' trap, Abigail! I definitely will not let you run in there like an idiot. That would be plain stupid." Sadie emphasized the last word scornfully. Her answer gave Sadie a dumbfounded look from Abigail. Oh, and how Sadie knew it was just going to start now. 

"You call me a stupid idiot? Who waves here angry with her revolver around when she's upset, that nothing and nobody can stop her?!" Abigail mimicked a revolver during her speech that she madly waved around. Had Sadie not been so angry herself, she would have laughed at this gesture. However, Abigail had understood pretty well what she was getting at, Sadie had to give her that. 

"You're right, but as you can see I got away every time. Praise the lord!” Sarcastic she spat the last words and looked up at the ceiling with raised hands. "John is one of the few lucky people who can take good care of themselves, even if fate does not mean it well with him. When did he not come alive from a misery?" Sadie continued. Shaking her head Abigail stood there, the frustration written on her face.

"I can not believe it! Do you listen to yourself? He could use our help, God knows what he had to go through."

"Unless we know if he's okay, I do not want you to put yourself in any danger. We can't risk anything happening to you, Abigail. As you said, Jack is still there and I will not let him become an orphan." Sadie tried a quiet pitch and looked Abigail pleadingly in the blue eyes and in fact, something had changed in her facial expressions. "In the mountains we will be safe. North-west of here in the Grizzlies. When the air is clean, we can go to the Owanjila dam." A compromise. At least Sadie wanted to try. But she already guessed the answer.

"No, then it will be too late." Abigail turned away from Sadie, visibly crestfallen. "We should sleep now," she whispered, only just her hoarse words get through Sadies ears. 

Abigail turned away and let Sadie sat there. The only noise that sounded was the rustle of the covers as Abigail lay down. Then silence fell over the room, which suddenly seemed so dark and empty. A feeling that Sadie couldn't directly interpret tugged at her guts. Was it the bad conscience that spoke there? She couldn't shake the feeling off that it was much more than that. But it were Sadie's words that had Abigail so messed. Were it tears that had formed on her cheek and she had turned away so quickly because of that? 

Tensed, Sadie pressed her teeth together tightly. She didn't regret her decision. Sadie had made it a priority some time ago that she would do anything to protect Abigail. Jack needed her and the other way round.

Ever since Sadie knew her, Abigail sought a true family. That John treat little Jack as his. Nothing had changed. Of course, she wanted to know what had happened to the man she shared a son with. And Sadie understood that. She really did. But priority was priority. Things that Sadie could and did want to answer for. To go into perhaps unnecessary danger was not one of them. In the mountains, they were safe. A tactical advantage, if they did it right.

Yes, John was an idiot. But that didn't mean that Sadie didn't like him and wanted to deliver him to the wild, or other dangers that might lurk there. After all, there were more than enough of them.

But Sadie had seen him. How the bullet pierced his shoulder and threw him off the train. Dutch was the way back to save him, but he came back without him. A crowd of armed men had followed the train. Sadie didn't want to declare him a dead man. But the prospects were more than bad. But fate had given life to many moribund and John was a candidate who had escaped more than once. She wanted to be the last to give him the death.

Dutch was a lousy bastard. He probably didn't care about John anymore. If only Sadie thought he would have left Abigail in the clutches of the Pinkertons too … 

A very different kind of anger, than a few minutes ago crept into Sadie's bones. Nevertheless, Sadie couldn't get Abigail her family back. Nor could she give Dutch the bullet he deserved. With pleasure she would watch how he fell to the ground, his hat a few inches beside him and his beard gathered with blood. Her imagination painted a pleasurable sight that made her eyes flash.

Sadie's eyes flicked over to the bed. Abigail was already lying, of course she had turned her back to Sadie. A soft sigh escaped Sadie's lips.  
Once she was sure the Pinkertons had lost the track, Sadie would go in search of John.

She noticed the changes. John wanted to get closer to his family. Small, uncertain steps, like a baby who just started his first steps without help.  
That had certainly not escaped Abigail. The idea of a family probably swam since she became pregnant with Jack in her mind, spread inexorably and had finally settled like a cat you feed and it's keep coming back to you until it's just yours.  
Abigail had been hoping for a long time and the times at the camp had made the two of them weld together and let them know what they really wanted. One early, the other later.

Only when Sadie unconsciously felt a deep breath running through her lungs, she realized that her body felt alien. She heard her heartbeat, it throbbed in a normal rhythm, but it felt like it was in a cavity, vibrated against the prominent bones and echoed through her inner shell. Instinctively, Sadie hoped that sleep would clear everything and once she got up, everything was the same. Which 'same' did she mean exactly? That an hour ago or a few months ago? She didn't even know that.

A wave of fatigue overcame her. Hard Sadie became aware that she had little time to get proper sleep.

The silverware was still on the floor, letting Sadie remember how liberated the conversation there had been with Abigail, while Sadie dropped exhausted into the bed. Before Sadie closed her eyes completely, she made sure she had her shooting iron in her holster next to her. Near to reach. Her eyelids flickered. Quietly she mumbled Abigail a good sleep and allowed her body to drift out of consciousness. Only the taste of the wine sneaked into her mouth once more and coated her tongue with a snappy aftertaste.


	3. Ice Cold, Forever There

Far too soon the croaking noise of the cock sounded and Sadie could have sworn something like an amused cackle came from his throat. If she wasn't so damn tired, she would have gone to see him on the spot to turn his neck.

Slowly, the sleep crept out of her foggy mind and the thought made her smile. No, she really wouldn't do that. She should be grateful to the bird, after all, they were refugees of government. Time was the most valuable asset they currently possessed. And they didn't have much of that.

Her muscles felt tight, so she stretched slowly and intensively the next moment. At once she felt a kind of relief and stifled a yawn. The thin curtains on the window were drawn, but the first light effects were revealed by the fabric.

A movement to her left made her look up. The cock was silent and Abigail had her eyes closed. He had done his best, but this woman hadn't been touched in any way. Sadie's mouth rose to a crooked smile that came over her at Abigail's sight. Her dark hair was still open, wildly playing her gentle features. As she lay there, Abigail looked younger than Sadie had ever seen her. Her face was clear of concern, and her skin looked as soft as silk in the dim light. Sadie overcame the urge to convince herself, to stroke her hand over her cheek to know that it wasn't just a stupid thought. Nevertheless, she denied her body any movement and resisted this nonsense.

With a deep breath, she cleared her head and pushed the idea aside.

The realization came like a resounding slap in the face. Presumably, the two were still at war, after the latest events to judge. After the heated discussion, Abigail had turned away from her, disappointed, and most of all, hurt. A sting went through Sadie's chest. Sadie didn't want Abigail to build a wall in front of her, to hide from her sometimes harsh words. But if that meant she knew Abigail was safe, she would be able to live with it. She tried to swallow, but her mouth was too dry and uncomfortably sticky. 

Silently, Sadie sneaked out of the room, she fastened her belt around her waist as usual when she was at the door and had closed it carefully. Before Sadie took the stairs she blinked the rest of sleep out of her eyes and passed her hand over her face, swollen. Sadie didn't know what it was, but she could say with certainty that the next few days would be exhausting. As she moved, the purse jangled as if to signal her what she was up to. Exactly. Food and then cut and run. The Pinkertons had probably picked up their trail long ago. A never-ending race.

Audible, Sadie came down the stairs, rhythmically the wood drummed under her boots. Immediately she was greeted by the curl of the host, who apparently still had shift. Poor owl. Sadie's eyes met his, he looked tired and after the few hours in which he had probably not got any sleep, looked a bit sunken. Just like Sadie felt. Those hours had just given her a burst of energy, which had subsided as soon as she had closed the door. Now she dreaded the thought that the sun would shine her every moment in the face and she could feel bared.

"Hey." Sadie stood in front of the desk and dropped a few coins loose on the table. His eyes focused on Sadie. As the jingling sounded in his ears, his pupils loosened and pursued the coin that rolled toward him. "Not to thank," she said, resolutely stepping on the door. 

Her hand had settled on the door handle, but Sadie paused and looked over her shoulder. The man didn't seem to notice, his head was lowered and his eyes were fixed on something Sadie couldn't see. He was probably looking for the lost coin.

"If my companion asks where I am, tell her I'm looking around the city a bit." Without waiting for an answer Sadie walked through the dark wooden door.

To Sadie's surprise, there was a gray veil over the city, the sky was murky, and all the signs of the sun remained hidden, hiding behind a gloomy crowd of clouds. Sadie would not have been surprised if the sky had broken anytime and a shower of rain poured down on the land. Instinctively, she pushed her hat lower in the face. The air was dry and cool, the natural stench of hay and horse dung lay on the streets.

A puffing sounded and her pupils focused on the culprit. Her bob waved his head in delight as their eyes crossed. Smiling, Sadie approached the stallion.

"Hey, my big boy." Her hand stroked his nose. His nostrils wiggled and hot breath came to meet her. “I'm sorry, I have nothing to eat, if you want that.” A few more times, Sadie stroked his face. "Then we want to get something for you." She let go of him and her eyes went over the house facades of the small village. Of course, nothing had changed since her last stay. The shop was located directly opposite the hotel. Worth's General Store.

As Sadie entered the shop, she came across a wave of various odors. Spices and tobacco stood out clearly. But few other groceries mingled with it. The gentleman greeted her choppy, before he returned to his activity of giving the goods, which had probably just arrived. Sadie had to admit that she was pretty early and most of the time, he certainly had to deal with customers an hour later. That would explain his slightly grumpy mood, which emanated from him. But Sadie wouldn't be herself if it disturbed her in the slightest. 

"Howdy." Plated, she nodded to him and tapped on her hat. As she looked around the shop, her boots clattered on the wooden floor. Sadie didn't catch the shopkeeper's gaze just once. Unspoken, but like a challenge, it stood between them. 

The older man, with a beard that almost reached his chest and a furrowed forehead almost as a kind of decoration on his face, eyed her with stern eyes. His stiff bearing showed that he ran out of patience. 

A pair of glasses would have fit him fine, Sadie thought. 

Sadie, on the other hand, looked around the shop innocently and every step she did yelped hollowly in the little shop. Of course, she didn't miss the attitude and included expression of the man. In the meantime, his eyes followed every movement Sadie made.

"Do you have it soon?" He renounced any courtesy, his voice audibly annoyed. Unimpressed Sadie shook her head.

"I'm still looking around." Of course, Sadie knew what she wanted and actually she could have been as good as out there, but this man was just playing her cards. And when was a little fun prohibited? After all, she didn't want to rob him and was about to pay. Only that she had an extra presentation for the money. Nothing to complain about, Sadie found.

The most exciting thing that would possibly happen to him was the evening visit of his local pub and the meeting of his drinking buddies. So he had at least found something to skimp on. A pleasure, a give and take. That was Sadie's favorite. 

Sadie couldn't resist and started to whistle. A little bit of irritation was still to have. He sighed loudly and Sadie could imagine him peering over his glasses if he had one.

"Can I help you?" His eyes narrowed as he studied Sadie once more. He had lasted longer than she had assumed. 

"Nice that you ask. In fact, you could help me out. I need ... let's say, something of everything. A blanket, happy to be the biggest you can muster. Food for a few days, for humans, as well as horse. Everything that fits in my pockets," Sadie listed. 

"Next time you come up with the language before you swallow it, young lady." 

“You can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink.” Sadie winked at him and aimed the door. "I'll be right back." Sadie stepped out the door and saw him looking up, shaking his head. 

Her path took her to the local weapons shop. This time she came straight to the essential and got a supply of cartridges.

Sadie didn't want to waste any more time and leave with Abigail as soon as possible. Would Abigail still show her the cold shoulder? She had difficulty appraising this woman. 

Again Sadie went to the grocery store. Without further ado, she went to the store and wound up the business. Everything she needed, he had packed on the counter. Sadie thanked him sincerely and gave him a small tip for the circumstances.

As Sadie stepped out of the store again, her gaze turned to Bob. This time he was no longer alone. Three more horses were tied to the stake there. Were they already there when she left to get ammunation?

It was nothing unusual, no way. But the uneasy feeling that she had gotten at the end of the day made itself wide in her again, slowly shoveling through her stomach. 

Sadie's footsteps quickened, she swiftly threw the back over Bob, almost careless, and threw him a few loose apples at the feet. Sadie's legs pulled her through the door of the hotel before she even finished. 

There was no face to be found at the reception. Did her golden boy finally end shift? But where was his replacement? Before Sadie could think about it, she stumbled hastily up the stairs and it was voices that made her pause that second.

Her breath coupled in her throat and left a sense of congestion. She tried to calm down, after all, Sadie didn't know if Abigail was truly in danger or if her concern was just playing a trick on her.

The voices were muffled, even with the strained attempt to hear something out, Sadie failed. She clenched her teeth, tension running through her entire body.

Quietly she took the last steps of the stairs and crept attentively to the door behind which Abigail was. Behind the door she feared that far more was happening than she wanted. Abigail's face flashed in her head. As she lay there in bed, innocent and pure, so carefree and free of any imbalance.

Suddenly the picture changed and Abigail's eyes were wide open, in front of her stood three dark-clad men leaning over her, panting. 

Immediately Sadie rejected the cruel idea. The ignorance drove her crazy. Her hand embraced the iron handle of the door. Cold it came with her glowing palm in touch.

Voices again. Far more than a whisper, but hardly clearer than that. Outraged expressions of opinion, definitely Male. 

Had the Pinkertons found them or were they the remnants of the O'Driscolls? Sadie's thoughts rolled over. Whatever it was, she had to get Abigail out alive. Why did she leave Abigail alone in the first place? She knew the risk, she knew what could happen. And yet she left Abigail alone, unarmed and helpless in her sleep. After all, Sadie should have known better. Foolish as she was. She was ashamed of herself.

Muffled noises sounded to Sadie from the other side. Was that Abigail? 

Without thinking, Sadie pushed the door open with a jerk and in the same motion nimbleed her revolver. At that moment, the picture revealed itself to her, the time seemed to last a heartbeat as everything moved in the room.

Three dark figures with long coats shot up with their heads. Sadie didn't have time to look at each one individually. All she saw was Abigail. Gagged on the bed. Wild, she turned under the grap of the tormentors. Two of the men tried to keep her still, the other stood farther off the window, blowing a cloud of smoke from his lungs. The smell gathered in the room and hit Sadie.

Enraged, Sadie immediately aimed her revolver at his silhouette, aimed his head, and without batting an eyelid pressed the trigger, which felt so familiar. The bullet broke through the barrel and struck through his throat, the cigarette landed glowing on the floor and rolled discreetly over the floorboards. Gargling he enclosed his neck with both hands, the blood spilled through his dirty fingers, turning his hands red as if a little kid had been playing with paint. He stumbled blindly through the open window and was gone. The other two men were startled, their grips still around Abigail's joints.

"Shit," a rough voice cursed, "take care of her!" One reached for his Colt, as a result of which Abigail seized the moment and kicked him in the guts. That gave her a slap from her other tormentor. But the distraction sounded like a call to Sadie, for when the man recovered from the kick in the next second, Sadie's revolver handle hit him in the face, knocking him down with a dull thud.

"Asshole." hissed Sadie between clenched teeth.

In order to waste no time, Sadie turned to the bastard, who was still standing there with gun on him. She was greeted with a dirty grin and eye contact with his barrel. Sadie licked her teeth. She was too slow. Her eyes immediately went to Abigail and back again. Abigail seemed paralyzed, everything stopped. No sounds, only Sadie's tense breathing in her own ears, mixed with the roar of her heart. 

It was a drawn picture of two rivals facing each other in the dim light. The air thinner than on a mountain peak. 

Then the first shot cut through the tense air, sharp as a blade and deafening loud.

Sadie drew in a sharp breath.

She watched as Abigail rammed a knife into her opponent's shoulder, stealing it from his belt holder and his scream echoed in Sadie's ears, like the shot still in her hearing.

Beeping laid on her ears, making everything seem far away. Pain caught her attention. As if in slow motion, Sadie brought her hand to her stomach. It was warm, but she felt no moisture. Was it because her fingers were numb?

Slowly she pulled her arm back, her pupils found her hand. Fresh blood covered her fingers and seeped into the profile. The time was still difficult to perceive and the events were out of reach, blurred in the background.

The reality broke in on her. Suddenly Abigail's anxious, panicked features appeared before Sadie's inner eye. No, stop. Abigail was actually right in front of her. Was that fear in her face? 

Sadie watched Abigail's lips making mute words as if she had been deprived of her voice. Her hands wrapped around Sadie's shoulders and jerked her out of her trance, into the here and now. At once she caught up with time and everything was crystal clear again. Screams pierced her ears and Abigail's voice was also below.

Abigail yanked her around and Sadie did as she was commanded. She ran. The pain that flared up was hidden by her. The man, who was allowed to taste her revolver handle, straightened up, but the two women were faster and scurried down the stairs in panic. Behind them, the cartridges popped out of their pods and caused further noise, indistinct shrieks of their pursuers was drowned out by the shots, which drove them to continue to run.

Stigmatically, Abigail tore at the reins, which were attached to the stake until they broke loose. The panic in her movement was hard to miss, her face drawn with tension. The stinging pain ignored Sadie as she jumped behind Abigail on the horse. But to Abigail, Sadie's features were exhausted, but not less upset.

Sadie clawed her revolver and Abigail slammed Bob in the side until he picked up speed. Concentrated, Abigail avoided the human being on the way, who looked at them in alarm. Presumably they didn't miss the shots. It would be astonishing, if it would have passed anyone at all and not the whole city stood in the meantime startled on the legs. Sadie looked over her shoulder and shot at her pursuers for time to win. Her aiming accuracy suffered from her pain, which made her arm heavy.

With a jerk, Abigail turned around, almost knocking Sadie off her horse, had she not quickly wrapped her arm around Abigail's hip. Her heartbeat went up a gear, if that was even possible.

Shortly after, Sadie heard the trigger for the sudden turn, a group of armed men rode up to them. The danger that it were Pinkertons or other bounty hunters was too big.

Shots were falling, hissing dangerously close to her ear.

"That way!" Sadie shouted and Abigail urged Bob to run faster. Another look back and Sadie knew that it was too late, the men had seen them and increased in speed.

That couldn't be the imagination, the Pinkertons had indeed taken their track. That was great, just great, they were just missing! It rounded everything off perfectly. Gunfighted bounty hunters whose companion Sadie had on her conscience and the agents of the detective agency. 

To Sadie's surprise, the shots stopped. Her hand pressed against the wound. Once again, she inspected what was happening behind them. Just then she could see a startled horse disappear behind some bushes, whose rider had caught in the stirrup and was carried away. Dead. They had finished them off! 

They dashed over the hilly land, behind them Sadie heard the hooves of the horses drumming on the ground and the image of a large, swirling cloud of dust, shot through Sadie's head, which lay threateningly behind the riders. 

Slowly, a well-balanced weakness overcame Sadie's body, her limbs felt weak and the lack of sleep was felt at the most unfavorable time. But it was not the lack of sleep that robbed her body of energy. It was the bullet wound. Her left side felt numb and at the same time it burned painfully around the bullet hole. 

Previously, Sadie had had nothing to do with such a wound, the feeling was completely alien to her. The bile came up to her. What if she didn't make it? Who would be with Abigail and keep an eye on her, that she could embrace her son again?

No, Sadie bit her tongue. That would not happen. It took quite a bit more to clear her from this world. A bullet below the ribs was none of them. That would be laughable, would 't it? In her inner monologue, Sadie realized too late how the blood gathered in her mouth. The taste briefly made her flinch, until Sadie realized that she had nothing to fear and that she herself had to go into debt. For a moment she thought she must spit blood from the injury. Relieved, Sadie swallowed her precious blood.

Sadie wasn't sure if it was a smart idea to shoot at her pursuers, so she stayed that way. The two women still had a lead. And she didn't want to risk the men returning the shots, besides Sadie already had an injury and that worsened their chances by far. Nevertheless, Sadie worried that they would soon be caught if they didn't find a solution quickly. These men were more than sure of victory.

The cliff split before them, clearing a bumpy path that led to the Dakota River. Large stones towered on the shore, as well as in the water and decorated the river. The shadows of the mountains and trees reflected in the pouring river, making everything seem even darker than it was. the waterfall boomed loud, estimated three men tall, which was on their right and pushed the flow forward. 

"Through the mountains, up there!" Sadie pointed out.

In front of them were two massive mountain slopes, which were connected by a drawbridge. The path went right under the bridge and Bob struggled to keep his pace. Bushes sprouted green and more trees stretched on the fertile land. Sadie felt the air getting fresher and the wind getting stronger with every feet.

"What if we don't make it?" Abigail's shaky voice rang in her ears just after she had made sure of her pursuers.

Now it was Sadie who looked back. The men had actually gained in lead. The revolver suddenly seemed to radiate heat, as if to call attention to itself.

"You'll be fine," Sadie replied confidently. She could almost feel Abigail's expression change.

“What are you up to?” she asked, agitation playing with her voice.

“I'm up to nothing just yet. But when it comes to that, do not look back and just keep riding. Understood?" Sadie spoke her words with steadfastness to convince Abigail that it was alright.

“I will not-”

“Understood?” Firmly and strong.

Hesitation and then, "Understood." 

Not nearly convincing. But that was enough for Sadie. Besides, she would just keep Bob going. Abigail would not be able to do much. But she wanted to get her consent, at least literally. How good that that was done.

Snow surfaces lay down on the grasses and signaled the temperatures change. Slowly a mist crept through the trees, as if it were on guard to not scare the forest spirits. Bald firs graced the edge of the path, whose wood was likely to rot, and painted a cool image of the temperature.

Clouds of breath formed in front of Sadie's face, and the breaking cold gradually made her shiver. Shortly thereafter, the first flakes trickled from the sky and also the path that drove them further into the mountains, led the fugitives deeper into the white wonderland. 

Sadie hadn't seen snow for months. Not so long ago, it was part of her life. The thought hurt. But she had no time for that because her pursuers caught up dangerously.

The mist thickened, the snowfall increased and whirled around their bodies in the icy wind. If Sadie didn't know better, a storm would approach. Or, better, they rode straight into it.

She knew this place, Sadie knew, but now she couldn't see anything before her eyes, except white. The snow lashed through her face, burning on her skin and stung uncomfortably in her eyes, which had narrowed to slits. Steady fog made Sadie see barely more than two meters ahead.

"This is our chance! As soon as the path turns, we dismount and let Bob put the Pinkerasses on the wrong track," Sadie shouted against the roaring wind.

"I don't know if I even see anything!" Came in response and Sadie had problems under the thunderous wind to clearly understand her. 

Sadie would not give it to Abigail, but she felt the same way. But she had to get through the plan, without doubt, and Abigail should trust her.

"I'll give you a sign!" Sadie would use her feeling. Good, old gut feeling. After all, she lived in this area back then. What should go wrong?

However, the cold bothered her, the wind tore at her clothes, she tried hard to keep her hat on her head, and her entire body seemed to go numb. Only and alone the wound radiated a contrasting heat.

Despite the pain in her bloodless fingers, Sadie fumbled at the hem that held the bags to the saddle. Of course she would try to take the provisions and the blanket with her.

"Now!" Sadie screamed. Her hands were clutching the bag and when Bob came to a halt, she jumped from his back. 

She was weaker than she had assumed, for she bent sideways. Without hesitating, Abigail slapped Bob on the rump and helped Sadie get up frantically. Abigail confiscated the bag, which she immediately threw over her shoulder, and pulled Sadie through the inscrutable land. Stumbling, Sadie came after her and caught up with Abigail with an effort. A lot of effort. Because the wind hit her nasty in the face, wanted to prevent her from every step forward. It had probably conspired with the Pinkertons. In addition, her whole body was in flames, everything was burning and Abigail's grip on her wrist was steely and anything but gentle. 

At that moment, Sadie felt it. It was not just snow that lay under her feet. A massive layer of ice opened up in front of them. Sadie felt it, even if she couldn't see it at the time in the intrusive storm.

"It shouldn't be far, keep going!" Sadie pointed out. Many explorations from back then, had taught her Ambarino. She had seen a lot of places. Including the Barrow Lagoon. They were actually correct! 

Don't give up, Sadie thought. It was only a few feet, she confirmed herself, then they would have made it.

Their pace was cut off by the smooth surface and Sadie feared every second that the pursuers had caught up with them and hadn't swallowed the bait. Let alone, seen in this storm! 

The lungs burned in her chest, like everything else, and her breath came in bursts in white clouds before her eyes. But Sadie didn't know giving up. 

After a while, the snow crunched under Sadie's feet, signaling solid ground, and before her, something opened up, covered with snow and frightened flakes that still made it hard to see. 

But if she didn't fool everything, it was a hut. Sadie knew this hut, she knew it was there. However, she didn't know if the hut was occupied at this time. When Sadie first visited this place, there were two strange guys living there from the south. She didn't know any more, because Jake, as caring as he was, had wished the two guys a good day and rode on with Sadie. He had been the kind of man who avoided the hassles, coupled with his benevolent soul. And these two guys had looked like more than just trouble.

After all this time, Sadie now understood what Jake had been up to. Such an irony that it just had to catch him and it was now up to Sadie to find and attract the trouble. When was death supposed to catch up with her? She couldn't shake the thought off that it would take a while. No mercy.

Weak climbed Sadie the small steps of the wooden hut behind Abigail. Sadie's hand readily dropped on the revolver. Before she pushed open the door, she gave Abigail a look who immediately set herself up behind her.

Demanding, the wind whistled over the mountains, leaving a chill on her chilled body. Ready for action Sadie pressed against the door, prepared for everything.

But instead a sigh of relief came over her lips. No peasant catchers present, only the cold air and abandoned objects, which now trudged away without a master. Exhausted, Sadie dropped to her knees, her face drawn with pain. They had made it, they had escaped.

But how long, what assured them that the Pinkertons didn't catch on? Sadie couldn't rest now, she had to remain alert, prepared for the worst. As if on command, Abigail's soft voice sounded.

"You need to rest." It wasn't a statement, but a call. But before Sadie could respond, the other continued. "No ifs and buts. I know what you're thinking. But that doesn't change your current situation. The wound needs to be treated." Abigail must have looked at Sadie's face. Or she really knew Sadie so well. 

Of course, Abigail was right. If it weren't the Pinkertons, then probably the bullet wound.

The blizzard continued to rage outside, the wind was pulling through the floorboards nailed over the windows and hissing softly to itself. If the men were sensible, they would go on another time and the two women had a breather. 

Sadie couldn't walk a mile in her condition. Not in the weather, certainly not in her state. Traitorically, her teeth clattered. The cold was more biting than a rabid dog. The fact that her wet clothes stuck to her body didn't make it any better. 

Considering, Sadie let her eyes slip through the cabin. It was dark in the small rectangular wooden hut, only the frost that had settled in the room made it seem brighter. In the middle was a stove. Icicles formed on the edges and gave it sharp teeth. Right next to it stood a small table with forgotten utensils. Under the table hid pipes that didn't benefit Sadie next to the other stuff. Two chairs, which offered just enough seats for the two ladies, came as convenient. In case of emergency even as firewood. 

Furthermore, a loft bed filled the back corner and connected directly to a countertop. All kinds of garbage lay on the ground, nothing to use. Only the old, worn blanket could prove useful. Sadie was a little uncomfortable collecting it from the ground and using it. However, the blanket that hid on the loft bed she could look at with less disgust. Not to mention that they managed to carry their own blanket with them. But if Sadie looked at the floorboards like that, they could use any kind of pedestal. Although the hut was sheltered from the wind, it wasn't protected from the cold. How long would it take you to start a fire?

"There are some old boards here, perfect for a fire. Slightly damp, but for now it should be enough." Abigail stood beside the table and picked up the wood, to show it to Sadie relieved. Presumably the planks had fallen off the nailed window. "In addition, the railing was broken outside, which could provide heat for more hours." Without hesitating, Abigail headed for the door where Sadie was still kneeling.

"What? Now?" Sadie sounded anything but enthusiastic.

"That's just a step out the door, believe me, I can handle that." Abigail put her hand under the door knob, pointing, but no sooner was it a crack open, it clacked back into the hinges. 

"No." 

Challenging, Abigail's eyebrow rose as if she couldn't believe what she had just heard.

"Please stay out of my way, Sadie. Don't make it harder than it is."

"Harder? Do you know what would be harder? I'll tell you! When suddenly your skull is blown away and I'm on my own!" Sadie didn't want to take any chances, even if the bastards had probably caught up with them by now when they were hot on their heels. Better safe than sorry.

"Don't be silly!" Irritated, Abigail stepped away from the door. Sadie could hear even over the mournful wind how Abigail took a deep breath. "Alright, let me treat you at least." 

Oh, a compromise. But who was Sadie to complain? That was only fair.

"Okay," she gave in, and she could have sworn a smile flickered on Abigail's lips, but before Sadie could be sure, Abigail had turned away and inspected the stove. 

Only now did Sadie realize once again how stiff her limbs felt and the yearning for a warm fire overcame her.

Sadie struggled to her feet, her shuffling footsteps leading her to the chair at the table where Sadie heavily let herself fall on, her hand always clutching the bullet wound. Now she noticed the rancid skates, which were mouldering on the table. Which stories did they carry with them? An image enriched Sadie's imagination. Mild snowfall and a smiling sun, which was reflected furtively on the ice. A woman who played playful pirouettes on the smooth surface and went through her laps dancingly. Not far from her stood a man, happily watching his sweetheart, a heartwarming smile that reached to his eyes lay on his distinctive features, making him look like the boy he once was. It was a beautiful thought, free of pain and loss.

At that moment a clinking noise sounded and Sadie shot out of her thoughts. In front of her stood Abigail, looked Sadie in the eyes apologetically.

"An open bottle of whiskey …" 

"Perfect!" Sadie snatched the bottle from Abigail's hands, smelled it once to make sure no idiot had peed on it and took a long sip. Disgusted, she grimaced as her throat went hot. "It will do it."

"Just leave something to disinfect," Abigail warned Sadie with a skeptical look. Sadie already knew why she would give herself more than a sip. "I'll take care of the fire, it'll take a while. You can mentally prepare yourself for the procedure. "

A questioning look crossed Sadie's face. "Don't need it.", she replied.

“The men...”

"I'm not a man." Sadie's eyes flew over Abigail's face. "The only thing I need is my friend here." She flipped the bottle in front of Abigail's eyes. Shaking her head, but with the hint of a smile, Abigail turned away from her and squatted in front of the stove.

"Do you have any matches left?" She asked after a while.

"Yeah, but leave some for me." Winking, she tossed her the pack and was surprised how well Abigail could catch. 

Recognizing and paired with a smile, Sadie nodded to her. As Sadie watched, she chewed thoughtfully on her lip. So that was it, her home for the next few days? Sadie wanted to hope that the storm didn't make her prisoner. After all, that's what they fled from.

"They want us alive," Sadie blurted out. Abigail looked up from the stove and studied Sadie for a moment. Sadie rested her elbow on the table and shielded her eyes. They wanted to set some kind of sign. One more thing Sadie would not allow. Before that, she would take a whole army apart, with or without injury. "Damn bastards. That in Van Horn ain't been enough for them yet." Anger flared up inside her, "I have enough bullets for each of them."

"Sadie." Abigail's voice was calm and self-conscious. "That does not help us either." Sadie was about to respond, but Abigail quickly cut her off. "I know. These men are unpredictable. I have experienced it myself. But we are outnumbered. And not as strong as it used to be. Nobody will keep our backs free here. We are on our own. You and me." Abigail had a point, it was just the two of them. Sadie shook her head.

"I'm sorry, Abigail. These pigs just make me so angry." Abigail nodded knowingly. 

"I know." Abigail paused and inspected the oven, but without moving. "We need a plan, they know we couldn't get very far."

"Yes, and I want to be damned if the bastards give up easily." Sadie snorted.

"If we are unlucky, they bring more man. But ... are we worth it? After all, we are women."

A suppressed laugh escaped Sadie. "That heats them even more. Two women who managed to escape? Impossible. They can not let that sit on themselves." 

"I hope not," Abigail sighed. "Let's think about it later. If I'm not mistaken, we'll be stuck here a little longer. The storm outside reminds me of old days." 

Sadie squinted at the small window where the planks had fallen off. Abigail was right. It looked like the night Sadie met the gang for the first time. Nevertheless, her thoughts remained with the Pinkertons.

Clever investigation teams trained on tracks was Sadie's worst thought. Because at some point they would have to go out to get food and firewood. Blurring the track every time would be a waste of time. The time would be better used to move on. A new hiding place to let fall the rates to be found.

Not to mention that Sadie carried a damn bullet wound. But Sadie was the last to spread the pessimism. Behind her eyes, purgatory hid directly from hell, knowing how to use the last breath for herself. Come what may. Against all reason.

She just hoped these bastards wouldn't do anything to her Bob. Such an honorless doing would fit them. 

Sadie's eyes lit up, shy flames flickered cautiously, in front of it an enthusiastic Abigail, who had finally managed to bring the fire to life. Internally, Sadie looked just as Abigail showed it from the outside. She could hardly wait for the room to gain warmth and leave a pleasant feeling on her skin.

"Step one would be done." Satisfied with her work, Abigail stood and looked down at Sadie, who innocently took another sip of the whiskey. Critically, Abigail inspected the bottle and then Sadie to make sure she had enough left.

"No need to look that way, I'll pay attention," Sadie reassured her.

Unconvinced, Sadie saw it from a mile away, Abigail began picking up the old blankets, which were close to decay, and put them together enough to make a small padding spread over the lower half of the bed, then the clean blanket over it. Then she pulled the other chair aside and sat ready for it. Demanding, Abigail looked at Sadie. 

"Alright." Sadie leaned against the table as she stood, trying to keep a steadfast face that didn't express her pain and before she handed the bottle to Abigail, took another sip. "To the good!" In fact, she felt the liquid slowly settle over her mind, leaving a comforting warmth. Welcome, Sadie let in the feeling.

"Before you lie down, let it examine me." Abigail demanded, raising her hands and nimbly tugging at Sadie's shirt, which was clinging to her body soaked with blood.

"Okay," Sadie said, giving her a nod of agreement that gave permission to Abigail's questioning gaze. Without hesitation, Abigail gently pulled on the shirt until the hem appeared. Then she started to open the first buttons to get a better look. Sadie felt Abigail's warm hands brush a whisper over her cold skin. Uncontrollably, she shuddered at the touch. Abigail adjusted her and kept looking, then raised her head.

"A smooth bullet. We speak of known good fortune in misfortune." There was a soft smile in her face. Sadie nodded. 

"This is my specialty now." After all that happened, she even believed it herself. Was it a curse or a blessing? Sadie did not know. "I don't even believe in luck." A throaty laugh broke its way out of her throat. Abigail shrugged.

"Maybe now is the time to start." She smiled at Sadie.

"No chance."

Willingly, Sadie lay down on the bed. She could feel the cold wood through the blankets and the fabric of her clothes, sending another chill through her frozen body. But this one was more specific. Uninvited ... cold? At least that's what Sadie would call it. Although she barely knew what that meant.

"I'm sorry, but I have to use the new blanket for this." Abigail already held it in her hands, letting the fabric slide through her fingers, looking for a suitable place to rip.

"Don't worry, it's big. The biggest he had. If you're good, we'll have something else to cover up later on." Teasingly smiling, Sadie challenged Abigail's craftmanship. 

It would be a small loss, considering that neither had a jacket, but nevertheless the blanket would have done a useful service. Of course, Sadie trusted Abigail to save half.

Before Abigail started, she disinfected her hands with a splash of alcohol. She cut a crack in the blanket with Sadie's knife and split it. Afterwards, the dark haired dabbed one of the ends with the liquid that had previously took soft care over Sadie's mind.

"Are you ready?" Abigail asked. Was that compassion that lay on her features? 

"Born ready." Sadie knew the procedure, even though she herself was usually come away with it, a gunshot wound, it was only a matter of time before it would come to this. 

It had got Sadie hard. She had been paralyzed at that moment. Sadie Adler? She could hardly believe it herself. The shot thrown her back to the beginning and destroyed the change of the last few months that Sadie had been through. In her inner eye, Sadie had seen the men, the O'Driscolls, who killed her husband. Ugly grimaces that sneered at her face. Then there was only Jake. Shortly, Sadie wondered if she would see him again. The thought was unusually warm. No fear, no agony. Only her Jake, who was waiting for her.

When Abigail's face had appeared in front of her, the vision burned like mist in the air. And she knew that no matter how wide open she received the death, it was not her written hand. There were still the people to whom she owed her goddamn life. The woman who first offered to stay with them, the gang of outlaws who had revealed a new life to her, as a broken girl they had offered her a home and accepted the woman she was today. With open arms.

Sadie gritted her teeth, feeling as if she was biting granite. Hot pain ran through her stomach and she admonished herself not to bend. Abigail dabbed the wound, carefully but not without pressure. The seconds passed and Sadie tried to relax her muscles, against the pain. From time to time she caught a glimpse of Abigail, who was attentively fixing the wound. In the dim light her soft face seemed shadowy and the still warm flames played with the orange light on her features. Then her eyes met Sadie for a moment, as gentle as ever. A barely noticeable smile on the corners of her mouth. Or was Sadie tricked by the Shadow?

As soon as it was over, Sadie should turn around and start all over again. When Abigail was done, she slipped the piece of fabric over Sadie's back and closed it into a bandage, which she tied into a tight knot at the opposite of the the wound.

"That should be enough for now."

Sadie knew they needed more stuff. Soon, the provisional dressing would have to be changed. The blanket was the only thing that came closest to a bandage. In addition, medicine was not a bad idea either. Although Sadie would never refuse a good whiskey.

Sadie overcame the craving for a cigarette. She crawled off the bed and rummaged in her pockets until she found what she wanted. The matches were next to the stove and Sadie noticed that heat was gradually spreading around the fire. Her eyes lit up, the small flame dancing in her pupils. After a vigorous pull on the cigarette, it glowed and Sadie extinguished the stick with a practiced movement that she had presumably executed hundreds of times. The familiar smell caressed Sadie's nose and made her think of other times. Probably no better ones. Just different. 

The look of Abigail rested on her, she felt it and turned around. 

"Did you also want to?", Sadie asked a bit puzzled, pulled at the butt and received the welcome draw through the lungs, which she immediately relaxed, and pointed to her glowing cigarette. 

Abigail had never smoked. At least Sadie never saw it with her own eyes. Maybe that was her secret passion?

Shaking her head, Abigail denied. "No ... I was just thinking," she revealed. Her attitude didn't point to anything. If Sadie wanted to learn something, she had to ask.

"Is it about John?" Her feeling told Sadie that it had to do with him. 

After all, they were there in the mountains now, far away from the dam. Sadie felt like no winner. It hadn 't been a contest. But the circumstances had obviously taken them there. Actually Sadie was glad about it ... If only these bastards of the states did not scare them away. Now they might have been an easy target, surrounded and penned by a horde that wanted to see them hanging, in the eyes of a pack of people who sought the passage of time and cheered on it.

What would Arthur have said at that moment? Surely he would not have shied away from confrontation and invited Sadie to put the dogs under fire, until they realized that an intervention would be futile, a charming smile on his lips and a flash of his eyes that came out from under his hat. But the reality was that they would never give up. The thought pleased Sadie. Arthur handled his revolver like no one else. It was an honor for her to have fought at his side.

Abigail was silent, only the wind and the crackling of the fire could be heard.

"I wish I knew if he was okay," she said after what felt like an eternity. 

Lost in thought, pulled Sadie one last time at her butt and flicked it across the hut, brought her a disapproving look of Abigail. The next moment she didn't care, Sadie saw it in Abigail's eyes. Maybe she remembered what a dump they were in right now. Sadie didn't think it was that bad though. 

"I can not assure you, but what I can tell you is that he is a very tough guy. Nothing beats him down easily. You know him longer than me, so who am I telling this to." Sadie could only repeat herself, but it was the truth.

"What if he is back to camp? That would be his death sentence; if they didn't catch him, then there!" There was despair in Abigail's voice.

"Arthur was there. Do you think he would have allowed that? You know how he is!" Sadie had not intended her voice to grow louder. "No matter what, if John is still alive, he'll find you no matter where, no matter when. He loves you. I saw it." 

And it was true. The looks he gave her. The brooding face he put on. The knowledge that stole more than once into his conscience and was enlightened in his eyes. How not? Abigail was a wonderful woman. Not perfect, but she tried to take care of her loved ones, even when it was hard. Likewise, she had facets that testified to sheer strength. Sadie had admired her for that. The woman was younger than her and seemed to know more about the world than Sadie herself. Today she felt the purest respect.

"Just as I know them, they swung their revolvers to death." Abigail fell silent. "But somehow survived. You're right, Sadie. I'm just so worried," she continued after a short break. 

"I want to see you like that, with the belief that it will be better. Do you remember what you once told me? That I am brave and the strength lies in life. Now look at me. I don't want to say that you should be like me. But it's getting better." No, Sadie wouldn't want Abigail to retaliate for revenge, armed and on the hunt. Although she had liked the picture of Abigail chasing Milton a bullet through his head. Without hesitation.

Abigail didn't say anything else, she dropped her head and took a deep breath.

"What did we catch on our flight? We should eat something." Sadie's voice came back after a while. 

Shortly thereafter, Abigail ransacked the bag and decided shortly afterwards to dispel everything. In the back of her mind, Sadie had the agents who could burst in at any moment and make any escape impossible. 

"That's not much, but it should be enough for a few days. I hope the storm has given way by then."

And then what? Would the Pinkertons already be waiting for them? They absolutely had to come to terms with a plan. But Sadie had trouble concentrating. Although her body gradually thawed, there was the pain, the alcohol, and the lack of sleep that clouded her mind. Not to mention that it wouldn't get much warmer.

Sadie aimed for the empty chair, but before that she took the bread that Abigail had lovingly lined up with the other foods, divided it into two, and sat down after giving the other half to Abigail.

"It may be risky ... But you should rest and sleep." Abigail looked as exhausted as Sadie felt.

"What about you?", Sadie wanted to know. 

"I'll keep watch."

"With the storm, it's more risky to wander out there. Even for the men." Sadie didn't know how hard-boiled the guys were, but everyone with a spark of understanding didn't mess around with the weather. "You should lie down, too. Who knows when we'll have the chance next time." If the storm was over, they had to be prepared.

"Probably," Abigail replied, her eyes darting from Sadie's. Did she fear sleep? The accompanying nightmares? Did she have any last night without Sadie knowing? Sadie knew it from the time Jack was taken. Jack ... Now she realized.

"He's fine with Tilly." Sadie waited until Abigail's eyes went to her. "He's probably just trying to get Tilly to read him a story and will not get enough of it all day."

"He loves stories." Abigail smiled thoughtfully.

"That'll make him a pretty smart boy, watch out, Abigail." Abigail's continued smile betrayed that Sadie had said the right thing and had relieved her of the burden of thought at least a little bit. "Do you believe that he once called me aunt?" Sadie asked her seriously.

"Really?" Abigail could barely hold back her grin.

"No shit. Imagine my look." Sadie grinned now.

"Jack likes you, you know." Abigail's laughter died until it resembled a sad smile that deserved her son, who could not be with her at that moment.

"He's a good boy," Sadie said. "I'm looking forward to seeing him again. We have a lot to catch up with."

"Oh, is there something you ain't telling me, Sadie Adler?" She raised an eyebrow playfully.

"Hey, let a woman know her secrets," she countered. "He asked me if I could teach him to smoke." She admitted after a moment's silence. Abigail's gaze was golden. But before Abigail had a chance to speak, Sadie snapped under her stern, indignant eyes and could no longer suppress her laughter. "I'm just kidding, please don't kill me! I saw it in your eyes."

Well, Abigail laughed too. Sadie suddenly realized that she knew it all the time. "Oh, that was good," she laughed.

And it was again one of those moments that Sadie so valued. Even when everything around them was on fire, she could find something to laugh about, little moments that gave them new strength and hope. Without constantly thinking of the upcoming duties. It was important. Sadie had long given up hope, but she didn't want to see Abigail without it. Because then even the pretty glitter would disappear in her eyes, that she carried so often with her. Was it a selfish will? Sadie could not answer it.

The fire crackled softly. The once frozen icicles dripped now without resistance from the frame. Was it the feeling of peace that came over Sadie, contrary to all that was? It almost seemed like that.

After they finished eating, Sadie watched Abigail hesitantly approach the bed. Her fingers stroked the old wood. How many hands had done it before? And Sadie was as if she could feel the structure on her own fingertips.

"I could really get some sleep. Besides, it looks like we will not be able to leave the cabin in the next few hours." As she spoke, she peered to the window and inspected the weather through the slits of the nailed boards. 

Sadie also saw that the storm had not diminished since they had settled there. At most the opposite. She saw nothing but white, and the hum of wind blowing the flakes wildly across the land. It could be noon and yet it was as dark as in the evening. 

"Let's try to get some sleep." Abigail slid against the wall as far as she could and glanced over at Sadie. When she didn't seem to move, Abigail knocked on the empty seat next to her. "Enough space for us both. That being said, we only have one blanket. You remember?" An amused smile crossed her face.

"Yes, I bought it. I still don't suffer from amnesia." Even amused, Sadie got to her feet, anxious to hold her right side. But before she joined Abigail, she pushed the chair she had just sat in front of the doorknob of the little hut. It might not be much, considering a squad of men on their trail, but it calmed Sadie's conscience.

"Here I am," she said as she carefully lay down next to Abigail.

"You alright?" Abigail asked. She must have seen Sadie's face.

"No problem at all," Sadie replied firmly. What was such a small scratch?

This earned her another head shake from Abigail, but adorned with a smile. Silence fell, and Sadie tried to close her eyes. It was good, more than she expected. To allow weakness. To feel heat.

Her body found relaxation, Abigail's extra body heat was like a blessing, and for a felt eternity, Sadie's body warmed up, she could feel her limbs again and keep them apart.

Not long, before she saw Abigail in front of her. Tied up, for the second time in no time. The one who probably saved her life that day. Had to leave her son behind. And lost the man she loved. Before Sadie could stop herself, the words fled from her mouth, as she herself did before the American state.

"Imagine, I'm John." Silence. Sadie was as if it were even quieter than before. Was that possible? Should she have shut up, had she said something wrong or was she already asleep to Abigail? Her heart started to move, treacherously loud in the silence. Before Sadie was lost in other thoughts, there was a rustling as Abigail moved, she took Sadie's arm and put it around her. Another few seconds passed, for Sadie it felt like minutes.

"No, I want to be with you." Sadie didn't notice that she had stopped her breathing that was now falling hotly over her lips. "Sleep well, Sadie." Her soft words gave Sadie no clue. Abigail was in the opposite direction, Sadie couldn't see her face, but at that moment she was glad about it. Could she bear seeing the true feelings on Abigail's face, even if her words sounded as sincere as ever?

After a long pause that didn't reveal her any answers, Sadie finally fell asleep. There was a loud buzzing through the floorboards, whispering over her ear and trying to get her the answers she needed. But before that came the cunning sleep and pulled her into the deep.


	4. No Objections

Until the storm had died, two more nights passed. In the meantime, Sadie had tried to forge an escape plan with Abigail. Sadie feared that the agents would guard the exits around the mountains. After all, they had last spotted the women in the immediate vicinity, vanished in front of their noses, and the storm had blurred every trace. The thought still conjured a mischievous grin on Sadie's face.

But that alone didn't help her. Now they had to act. As soon as possible. The time had since conspiring against them. This time Sadie did not want to fall victim to it.

Contrary to Abigail's previous wishes to ride to Owanjila Dam, she proposed to move further north, deeper into the snow-covered land, hoping the Pinkertons would give up the track. After all, they had done it once, back when the gang was one. This wasn't a bad idea, absolutely not. Sadie wanted to go to the Grizzlies, she still wanted to, she supported that fact. 

However, she had not expected to be found in exactly the second she wanted to leave with Abigail. These damned bounty hunters had almost killed them, now it was the time they were robbed. Sadie figured out a few weeks, if needed even months, to disappear in the mountains. But not as prey. As wanted women, but not as a hunted mouse with whom one tried to play and waited until it came crawling out of it's hiding place. In her current situation, Sadie would not have been able to escape the cat's clutches. Even if she had claimed otherwise.

Still, it was not their safety that took precedence. But Abigails. And Sadie had sworn that she would see Jack again. Even if Sadie died trying. But she did not want to miss how Abigail hugged her son again. So it was up to her to create a sophisticated plan.

As contrary the idea of fleeing farther to the north was, the more realistic it was to find freedom there. Sadie feared the past that could wait for her there. Colter. Not far away lay her ranch. Her former ranch. The thought suggested it would beat her in any of the directions. There was not much waiting for them north-south, except for snow, more mountains, and the track of the Spider Gorge winding its way through Colter and barking just outside the city. Then there was the north-east. When following the river, it led one as well through the mountains and trees of the building landscape. But the farther you move away from it, it's not just the trees, the snow, or the mountains on the horizon. It was the Adler's ranch, which painted a picture of a farm among the white. Once.

A potential accommodation? A grunt that drove Sadie's throat at the thought. Over her dead body. That's why Sadie had set Colter internally as her goal, not farther. What Sadie was worried about was the view of their food, which was slowly dwindling. Not to mention the missing equipment. Neither of them had a jacket. Only the blanket served as protection against the cold and if they couldn't find Bob, they would have to cover the distance on foot. At the expense of their physical reserves. Especially Sadie should be careful. Nonetheless, she would face the way with clenched fists. Such a little walk hasn't hurt anyone, she would have said.

So the ladies left directly the next morning, the sun was not visible yet and the sky was held in a dark shade of blue. For the first time, they stepped back into freedom, with no sheltered walls between them and the cold outside world.

Every step that Sadie took, she paid attention to her surroundings and made sure that no detectives could be seen in the distance. She was glad that it was still dark and that increased the chances to escape undetected.

As Sadie and Abigail climbed the hill at the foot of the mountain, Sadie felt Abigail's caring eyes on her. Sadie had told her more than once that she was fine and the way wouldn't be a problem, but apparently, Sadie couldn't convince Abigail. 

A silent sigh swept over Sadie's lips and showed in a white cloud before her eyes. That was the real problem - the cold. But Abigail had insisted that Sadie wrap the blanket around her body while they were out there. Sadie had finally given in to relieve her of her worries. But even now, it increasingly reminded her of days gone by.

Before they took the curve that the two distant entirely from the hut, Sadie looked back one last time. Abigail crossed her gaze, her cheeks already reddened by the cold. On her shoulder she balanced the bag with the rest of provisions. And behind her, the hut at the foot of the gigantic mountains was barely noticeable. In the dark it almost merged with the surroundings, and could just as well have been one of the many boulders, treacherously sticking out of the snow. Covered by the massive rock of the mountain and the bright white of the snow. A wonderful sight, drawn like an idyll in the frost.

Somewhat insecure, Sadie broke away from the scene and got going, the solid snow creaking under her boots.

"I didn't think I would miss the little hut. But I do." Abigail hooked in Sadie's thoughts. "We barely moved 30 feet away from it." Sadie saw the young woman wrapping her arms around her body and giving her a gentle look.

"Probably, that's just how Ambarino works," Sadie replied with a shrug, a wry smile on her lips.

"Understand."

After another few minutes of walking along a steep path, drawing endlessly and not unnoticed, Sadie whistled loudly. Bob had to be here somewhere, if the bastards hadn't caught him. She knew she might as well attract uninvited guests, curious eyes, probably from the Pinkertons. There weren't many in the mountains, only refugees, hunters, or crazy people. No one lived up there anymore.

Now Abigail looked more and more restless, because Sadie didn't give up.

"Sadie! What if someone hears us?" The concern in Abigail's voice was almost drowned out by the shivering cold. Sadie gripped the blanket with her left as she fumbled with her right revolver and presented it in response to Abigail's eyes. 

"Then let them try what they want." Sadie saw the barbs on Abigail's tongue and the start of an annoyed eye roll.

"Your condition. How can you think about fighting?"

"I have no choice, Abigail."

After a whistle, the next one followed shortly thereafter. After a while she fell silent. Her eyes narrowed to slits and Sadie looked intently into the darkness. If Sadie didn't fool everything, something came to her. The path bifurcated to one again and there, between the trees, an animal stirred. The size of a horse.

Sadie didn't know if it was luck, because she did not believe such a thing, but it felt damn good when she realized it was Bob. Bob, Sadie could always rely on, though he could be a stubborn.

"I knew it." Sadie said and gave Abigail a triumphant grin, who looked back impenetrable. 

"Hey boy," Sadie said softly and stroked his nose. Bob huffed, it almost sounded like he was happy. That made Sadie smile. "I'm sorry you had to play the bait. You'll get a little extra portion later," she added. And he had earned more than enough. Sadie was glad that even the saddle was still clinging to him and that no one had really bothered him. Relief.

"Don't think I'm not happy. It was just so risky." As Abigail spoke, she looked around.

"I know." Sadie paused and looked into Abigail's face. "We will be safe. Now that we have Bob with us, we're faster," she assured Abigail and looked at her shortly thereafter.

"I hope so."

"Then let's go." Sadie directed her words to Abigail, who nodded in agreement. 

The bag was fixed again and then Sadie pulled herself first in the saddle. An unpleasant stinging streaked through the wounded area on her body and Sadie didn't have to look again to feel Abigail's eyes on her. How long until it would get Sadie on the nerves?

Without further hesitation, she offered her hand to Abigail and helped her onto the horse. Then they started galloping. Sadie could watch as the pure snow under Bob's hooves was pitched and set a straight track. If someone should follow them, they were in a fix. Despite that, Sadie didn't come around looking at the snow with nostalgia. It were many days and nights. And then there was only red. Red snow, supposed to be pure and white, soaked in blood of men. No. Actually only Jakes. Jake's blood. Everything else came afterwards. Afterwards was unimportant. 

Sadie hadn't noticed her hands clenching into fists until Abigail's hand brushed over hers, so warm and alive, unlike the corpses in her dreams. Then Sadie's convulsive grip on the reins eased, she felt the tension in her fingers, it almost hurt to let go, and there were small crescents left where her fingernails had drilled into the palm of her hand.

Even though the snow provided a trail for supposed pursuers, they rode far off the beaten path. Every little measure could be of help. Sadie knew when Colter would be in sight, she had lived years in the area. At this moment, it shouldn't be more than five minutes before the small, abandoned mining town had to be in sight. The air also became thinner and the temperature dropped further. It was horrible.

But before that came into force, the tepid wind carried disturbing sounds. First, Sadie couldn't interpret it, but then, as she tore at the reins after a few more meters to command Bob the stand, she could listen more closely. It wasn't the wind that rustled through the firs, or any of the many wild beasts that had to be there.

"Tucker? Tucker! Where are you, Tucker?" It was a male voice, he couldn't have been older than twenty.

Sadie was undecided. He was clearly not one of the Pinkertons, that couldn't be. But was it smart to follow the voice, find out what was going on? It was already cold, Sadie longed for a warm fire. Abigail's warm body on hers. So they had been able to hold themselves at temperatures during the last nights. But it wasn't just Sadie's body that was gaining warmth, a strangely comforting feeling settled over her mind. Or her heart? She hadn't found out yet. But it was reassuring, that was all Sadie could say with certainty.

"We should look what he needs. Maybe he can help us." Abigail suggested, breaking Sadie's thought.

At the sound of her voice, Sadie blushed. It surprised her. She shook the thoughts aside. Even, if Sadie was still unsure about this, she waved the reins in the direction of the desperate voice, directing Bob through the thick firs. Abigail was right, he might even be able to spare them a jacket. With luck, thought Sadie.

"And if not, then-"

"Then you have your revolvers. I know, Sadie." Abigail ended Sadie's sentence, sighing. Involuntarily a smile formed on Sadie's features.

"Then," Sadie emphasized, "we are at least honorable citizens who help a man in need. And if everything is doomed to failure, then I still have my revolvers. You're right, Abigail." Sadie made sure that Abigail didn't miss her playful tone. Then she felt a playful push on her shoulder and laughed aloud.

The light of his torch clearly showed his point of view between the snow-covered firs from which he emerged.

"Hey, you there! Stop a minute, please!” The young man peeked out from under his hat, his red neckerchief striking Sadie's eye as a feature, and he spoke quickly after Bob came to a halt. "I'm looking for my friend. We was in the cabin and he went out to get firewood, but he got lost in the storm. I'm getting real worried, mister, I've searched everywhere. Would you help me look for him?"

"We'll help you." He seemed surprised when he realized he had two ladies in front of him. His features changed apologetically in the torch's light and he wanted to speak again. Sadie was faster. "Where are we looking?" 

In this area, Sadie didn't find it particularly shocking when someone disappeared. There lurked some evil. Avalanches and snowstorms were just one of them. Maybe he broke into the ice or a pack of hungry wolves got him. Tucker was his name, right? Poor pig. But the hope is known to give up last.

“You're good people, bless you! I'm gonna keep looking around the cabin. That's where I last saw him. If you could search the wider perimeter, I'd really appreciate it.” His despair was hard to miss. He seemed genuinely grateful, even now. 

Was it pity that made use of Sadie's feelings?

"Don't worry, we'll be right back," Abigail assured him.

Without saying anything, Sadie gave Bob the spurs and scouted the area with Abigail and, as it has since then, it was the cold that made Sadie feel like nothing else. She was glad that morning was dawning. It was less than 14 degrees. Sadie couldn't blame Abigail as she slid closer to her.

“Tucker! Tucker! Shout out if you can hear me!” His voice sounded through the trees.

"I want to hope that he can help us. The cold is almost as bad as a runaway O'Driscoll." Sadie spoke with clenched teeth to keep them from rattling.

"Was it the right decision?" She couldn't see Abigail, but Sadie could imagine her puckering her face thoughtfully. The question had given Abigail more to herself, Sadie answered anyway.

“Don't worry, nothing will happen. After that we are faster off than that Tucker boy could get lost. At best, with some provisions. I saw their camp riding by, they must have something." In those times, they needed help from others, if Sadie had to find a lost companion for that, please. But not without that the other hand washes the other. Unsubscribing should be the last remaining option. In case of an emergency, Sadie had been able to save a few more coins, which would certainly take them further.

"Where are you, you idiot? I'm starting to get scared!" The voice of the young hunter rang out , fading into the distance.

Meanwhile the investigation led the ladies on an open field, they left the firs behind them and in front of them some rocks jumped isolated from the snow. A deep trail went through the snow and led to one of those rocks.

"I hope there are no wolves lurking here." Abigail's voice urged Sadie's ears, on the basis of her body, which pressed against Sadie's, she could make out Abigail's movements, which told her that she looked alternately over Sadie's shoulders to keep an eye on the environment.

Sadie escaped a puff. "That would be the most enjoyable," she replied, suppressing the uneasy feeling along with the aggressive cold that gnawed at her skin, and carefully dismounted from the horse. In spite of this, however, the pain of the slowly healing wound howled.

"Here," Sadie took the blanket off her stiff shoulders and held it out to Abigail, "keep it warm for me." With a deliberate look, Sadie held it out to Abigail until she took the blanket and threw it around her shoulders. 

Of course, she knew that Abigail was against it, which is why Sadie had chosen her exact wording and Abigail finally accepted it with a spoiled mouth and a searching look.

Sadie had seen it from the last meters distance. The track ended before said rock and a limp body covered it. The trail of blood that gave the snow a new color didn't suggest anything good. Was he really dead? Sadie had to make sure.

"You stay on the horse.", She instructed Abigail. Her face had betrayed enough to Sadie. Was Abigail sulking? Even in such an unfavorable situation as this, that gesture warmed Sadie's heart at that moment. Sadie had expected everything, just not pouting. Contrary to Sadie's way of speaking, she would call it golden.

Before distracting herself too much, Sadie turned to the seemingly lifeless body. Oh, that could not mean anything good.

"Hurry up," she heard Abigail say quickly as her heavy footsteps led her through the hard snow to the man she was looking for and as well describing her displeasure.

When she stood in front of him, the inner turmoil was enough, a feeling that something was wrong. With a firm grip Sadie grabbed him by the shoulder. He was ice cold. His body was difficult to move. She pulled hard on him, and then Sadie felt him give in, a sound that only hinted that his flesh was already frozen to the rock, pierced Sadie's hearing. Shortly thereafter, Sadie was confronted with his face. It had hurt him badly. Not a nice sight. His whole face was torn, a pure flesh wound. One of his eyes was unrecognizable and the other was somewhere in his face, just not where it belonged. It was as if his face was squeezed and in the resulting grooves collected the blood, already frozen and overlooked with ice crystals. Slightly disgusted and taken aback by this image, Sadie grimaced and put her hand over her mouth.

"Do not look there, Abigail."

"His jacket..."

Then Sadie noticed what Abigail meant. The corpse had bad signs of a predator. His clothes were tattered and widely picked apart. But his jacket ... It was intact. As incredible as it was, the jacket had survived unscathed. At the sight of the gray fur jacket, it almost overcame Sadie, but at that moment she stopped herself.

"We can not scold him ..." Sadie's eyes ran over Abigail's face. Abigail's features betrayed nothing about what she might think. She just briefly twisted the corners of her mouth, which made Sadie believe it was necessary under the circumstances. "Let's get Tucker's friend and then we'll see,” Sadie suggested. Of course, she wanted nothing more than a warm jacket at the temperatures. But a woman had her certain honor and before she could touch Tucker, Sadie would at least need the blessing of his friend.

Sadie swung onto Bob, directing him in the direction they had come from. Instantly Abigail leaned against Sadie, enveloping her with her warmth, which Sadie gratefully allowed, arms swinging around her waist, closed around Sadie's stomach and the blanket between her fingers. Abigail's hand unintentionally touched Sadie's injury and her muscle jerked back. 

"Sorry," Abigail whispered, her warm breath tickling Sadie's ear and making her shudder. What Sadie summarily attributed to the cold.

"He's going to handle it ..." Sadie encouraged herself, Bob on the path of the footprints of ten minutes ago.

"He has no other choice." Abigail's voice was quietly addressed to Sadie.

"That doesn't make it better."

"But more bearable." 

Sadie didn't know if she agreed with Abigail or not, and spent the last few minutes brooding over it in thought. Did Abigail really feel that way? Sadie couldn't claim that she was completely blind to this view. Still, she didn't want to be warm with it either.

A moment later, the bright light of the torch reappeared, showing the women the way through the trees. They came to a halt near the camp.

“Hey, so... find anything?” Hope, so much innocent hope floating in this little question. 

Sadie wondered if he wasn't beginning to wonder what two women, not appropriately dressed, had to look up there. His concern had to strongly suppress the curiosity.

“Yeah... He's up the hill a ways, over on a rock. Listen, friend... You might not want to see him.”

“Oh... Tucker? Oh God!” Without hesitation he jumped on his horse.

"Shit," Sadie cursed and turned around. As much as Sadie was against guarding the boy, she followed him on foot.

"What do we do with him? We can not leave him alone like that. "

"So much for the subject, he can handle it. Damn it." Never wanted to run something smooth. "Let us wait and see. Then we ask him a little when he has calmed down. Shouldn't he be in hysteria ... "

"Ain't he already?"

"You're right. Crap." 

“Oh, God, Tucker!” The boy came to a halt sharply and jumped off his horse, wailing, he ran the last few meters. 

A few steps further on, Sadie stopped the horse and watched the whole area up close. Heavy breathing, mixed with heavy sobs. Poor guy, Sadie thought. She had heard how difficult it was for him to have Tucker gone. And now that!

“Oh shit, I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy,” he said. “Oh, Tucker... Tucker...”

As he spoke, Sadie heard it, an ominous rumble accompanied his words and passed unimaginably over the heads of those present. Sadie didn't have a moment to make her next breath. No sooner had the kid completed his sentence than Sadie saw the creature running towards him, which seemed to appear out of nowhere. Roaring, the adult animal stomped toward him. 

“Oh, Jesus, no!” He managed just before the bear's claws snaked around his body and his teeth dug into his flesh. 

Before Sadie could react, Bob banged his hooves uneasily. Unprepared, his panicky movements caught Sadie's balance and immediately threw her off. Abigail fell with her because Sadie felt Abigail's body catch some of her fall. The impact hit her teeth hard and took her breath away. Violently, Sadie's elbow hit the frozen ground, shaking her entire left arm, up to her shoulder. She cursed loudly. That was a pain in the ass. Sadie couldn't be sure if her injury, which she was already carrying around, had gotten something out of it. There was definitely more than enough pain.

The snow was courting the two with its shiny crystals and the freezing cold, but Sadie tuned it out, the adrenaline rushing hot through her veins.

The bitter cries of the hunter echoed through Sadie's ears, it went through her marrow and bones. Bob was out of sight and there was a clear field of vision on the attacker. Without losing any more time, Sadie reached for her revolvers. It stung uncomfortable by her left arm, while she reached easily with her right to her holster. Already as Sadie raised the Colts, she realized that she could hardly handle both. Her left arm went on strike and would buckle during recoil. Sadie didn't think twice, the first thought counted.

"Abigail, take, and shoot with all the blessing you have on the cattle!" Sadie thought it was a waste of time to put the revolver in her hand carefully, so she pushed it backwards, even if that carries to the bows, that the pain flared up again and there was a risk of hitting Abigail with the gun. But Sadie remembered Abigail's fishing skills, which she was allowed to watch last.

Even before Sadie fired her first shot, it thundered, followed by a rushing sound at her ear. Sadie recovered, had she been scared or wondered? Not a second later she also started, the bullets rumbled from both barrels and left the bear no break. His roar was almost worse than the boy's.

Did the boy stop screaming? Sadie couldn't even distinguish him and the bear. Screams and shots, in competition, who might be louder.

The monster let go, yelping and took aim at it's new target. Sadie swallowed. His eyes were set on hers, his paws pounding through the snow, his claws leaving an image of his paws, red rims surrounding the prints in the white snow.

Sadie became quiet. No more cartridges, just the clack of an empty drum.

"Damn," she heard Abigail hiss.

Sadie's pulse shot down her throat. Black eyes hung greedily on her body, wanting to shred Sadie, for the agony, they made it suffer. She shot and shot and then click. Smoke wafted through the barrel, fading in the darkness. Empty. Sadie didn't have any cartridges left. Bob kept her supply with him, kept in her saddlebag.

"Do you remember what I told you when the Pinkertons were hot on our heels?" Sadie didn't wait for an answer. "Don't look back and run."

"No..."

Sadie felt as if she could feel the ground vibrating as the bear came closer and narrowed the distance.

"Damn it, Abigail, there's no time for objections!" 

Just a few yards away. Sadie closed her eyes. He should take her, the main thing Abigail would make it. But this didn't stir a millimeter. 

Seconds elapsed in which Sadie had to feel its teeth and its hot breath on her skin at any moment. But instead, a dull noise. Slowly, Sadie's eyelids opened. And there he lay, before her, overflowing with blood, no less powerful in his sight than before. Maybe more. A magnificent animal, so big and strong. A survival artist. But the shots had brought him to the ground. His strength was at an end, Sadie saw it, its eyes pierced directly into hers. Dark, dark eyes, blinking at the last breath, slowly, almost sadly. Then it was over. Only its fur moved in the balmy wind.

Sadie let out a breath, not realizing that she had held it. Whimpering made her head startle. It came from the rock. That had to be the boy! She turned and for the first time since the fall, she saw Abigail in the face. 

Abigail was right behind her, the footprints in the snow telling Sadie exactly how she must have fallen. The two shared a look and decided without a word change to look for the young man. 

Somewhat cumbersome, Sadie got to her feet. Damn, one miserable after the other! But it was no different to the usual. It was no comfort, but it was something.

As they drew closer, Sadie could hear his gurgled breath, heavy rattle coming from his throat. He didn't sound good at all.

They stopped in front of him. Around him, all the snow had been soaked in his blood, stealing his reserves to shine in new color. He lay leaning heavily against the rock, lying half-buried, refusing to stay upright. His head hung limply on his shoulder, probably investing all his strength in his neck so as not to buckle completely.

Sadie watched him move his lips, they were already blue. But no words came out, only his heavy breathing, accompanied by a croak. Instead, blood spilled over his lips and ran down his chin. Carefully, Sadie dropped to her knees and approached the man. She leaned in, took his hand and squeezed tightly.

"What's your name, boy?" She asked him. Her voice was unusually tight, but she felt drained and weak. 

The hunter's eyes twisted, then seemed to catch himself, smacking from the blood in his mouth, trying to formulate an answer.

"N ..." coughing shook him. Sadie came a little closer. "Nick," he whispered. Just so Sadie could catch his name, which was more like a sigh than a word. She nodded steadfastly to him.

"You can do it, Nick," she insisted. Her eyes slid to Abigail's, who dodged her eyes meaningfully down shortly afterwards. Sadie knew as well as Abigail did. She took a deep breath.

His hand in hers felt anything but alive. Cold and rough, with blood and deep scratches, when he tried to throw his hands protectively in front of him and offered the bear a new attack surface.

"Ki ... kill ... me. Please." His breath was nothing but a wretched croak. Nick's eyes stared into Sadie's. 

Slowly, she moved her hand to his revolver in his holster. The bear had not given him a chance. As she reached for it, she kept his eye contact. His eyes closed. Sadie's hand tightened around the handle. The seconds passed, with Sadie keeping an eye on him. Had his breathing subsided? She checked Abigail, who looked just as helpless as Sadie was.

"Please ..." Nick whispered. Sadie didn't know if she should be happy that he was still alive or not. But at least she could do him the last honor. That was Sadie's sign.

"You're a brave man, Nick." Her hand squeezed his, firmer. Then it was the trigger that Sadie squeezed. Have shots always been so loud? It seemed louder than before. His head slumped to the side, his finger jerked one last time in Sadie's hand and then it was over.

The whole mountain seemed to be quiet and allow the shot to fade away from far away. There was no mercy in this world.

Suddenly Sadie became aware of the biting cold. She got up and whistled hard for Bob, her arms around her cool body. Her steps led her to Tucker, fingers burying in the fur of his jacket. What else was left for her? Carefully, as if she didn't want to disturb him in his rest, she got rid of his jacket. Sadie threw the jacket over her arm, closed the distance to her and Abigail and put it around her shoulders. Abigail seemed a little uncomfortable at the thought, but after a moment's hesitation, pulled it all the way. In the meantime, Sadie headed for Nick.

"I'm sorry Nick," she said, knocking him out of his anorak. He certainly wouldn't have wanted them to freeze, Sadie might think, to make it easier. The jacket was cold when Sadie put it on.

The two saddled up and took up Path, back where they had come from.

"We couldn't have done anything ...", Sadie started, even though she knew that Abigail had seen it.

"I know," she answered. "I've been around the gang long enough to see that." Something like mourning resonated in her voice.

Yes, Abigail had probably already seen a few deaths. Sadie was with the gang during the shootings, and even participated, to be able to say that more than one loved one had gone with it. What were the two names? Jenny and ... Davey? Sadie remembered that the two had died shortly before her meeting with the Van-Der-Linde-Gang. Based on their injuries. The graves were in Colter. The long-fallen church watched over the small tombs, where the dead should rest forever.

Sadie just nodded, assuming that Abigail had seen it.

A small icy lake appeared between fir trees, Cairn Lake. Two tents and a blazing fire, which lay to the right of the lake and beyond the fir trees, caught Sadie's eyes. She directed Bob toward the small camp Nick and Tucker had left behind. As if they were still there. A collapsed hut was recognizable, the roof was no longer intact, in contrast to the rest. Protecting mountains and a host of trees that surrounded them like spectators. Onlooker pack.

"Let's see what we find and continue to Colter without losing any more time. The shots must have been heard miles away," Abigail said.

Sadie was as if she had been traveling for hours. The sky was just getting light, in the distance you could see the shy glances of the sun, which ventured slowly out of its hiding place. She needed a break, something to eat, best to drink, because her throat was dry, cracked, like an old sheet of paper. The fire crackled invitingly and her stomach grumbled at the sight as if on command.

At the nearest tree, Sadie tied Bob and explored the area.

"Look, they might be of use to us." Abigail pointed to the camp in front of them. 

The tents were still intact, blankets lay waiting for their owners under the small canopy. They would be of use. The last blanket was wet from the fall and could now continue to be used carelessly as a bandage. For Sadie that came along just the right time. Speaking of ... Sadie opened her newly acquired jacket and checked her gunshot wound. A small, fresh red spot had formed where the wound was, making the old blood look rather brownish.

"Are you okay?" Abigail came up behind Sadie and laid worried a hand on her shoulder.

"Yes-" Sadie didn't come to the end.

"You're bleeding again!" Abigail spoke to the obvious.

"We'll take care of that later, let's eat something decent. There must be something lying around here somewhere." Sadie was sure that no one would go out without provisions, in addition they had been hunters. 

Disagree with Sadie's plan, Abigail gave in, however, not without giving her a scrutinizing look before she turned away and looked around more closely.

Sadie headed for the hut, the door was open, showing a spacious room. On the right wall stood a bunk, in front of it a forgotten pair of boots. Behind it was a table, some bits and pieces covering its surface. On the opposite of it was a small fireplace. Loose boards decorated the bare floor. Better than nothing, bigger than before, but less than last time.

She moved away from the hut and went to see Abigail, who was busy cleaning up one of the bags Nick and Tucker had left behind. Before Sadie could say anything, a movement in the corner of her eye caught her eye. It was a horse, not Bob, this was too dark. That must have been Nick's. Roused by the bear and now looking for its owner. He would 't find Nick here. Or Tucker.

"Abigail, we have a guest." Sadie said. She watched as Abigail looked around too hectically, knocking the bag down, with preserve crawling in front of Sadie's feet, which she stopped with one foot. A mischievous grin courted Sadie's lips. Of course, she had known that Abigail would think of anything but a horse. 

Abigail squatted and gave Sadie a look that told her to stop the jokes.

"Do you think he belonged to ...?"

"Hell yes. But he could be of use to us. "

Abigail inspected the horse in front of her. Just as she wanted to take a step towards him, he reared up uneasily. Immediately Abigail paused in her motion and looked over at Sadie, who answered with a shrug. Apparently he was still completely tizzy. Sadie couldn't blame him, after all it was a monster of a bear who had raged before them.

"Calm down, we're not doing anything to you." Sadie addressed the horse, careful to speak calmly and make slow, controlled movements. One step at a time. His eyes remained skeptical, his nostrils fluttering. 

"Don't worry, my dear." Sadie reached out her hand carefully. Disconcerted, he jerked his head and scraped his hoofs over the solid floor. "Everything is fine," she asserted. Then he left her hand in his immediate vicinity. For a moment, Sadie hesitated before she drove her hand over his snout, very gently.

"Here, give him one." As Abigail spoke, she headed for Sadie and the stallion. 

As soon as he got wind of it, he became restless again, his eyes fixed on Abigail. The delicious carrot in Abigails hands didn't helped either. 

"I think he doesn't like me." Abigail pulled a pout.

"I'm sure of that." Sadie laughed. "Give him time, it'll be fine.", she added when Abigail looked at her disapprovingly. 

Sadie imagined Abigail slapping her stomach again if she'd been allowed to be in Sadie's vicinity. Instead, she held out the carrot to Sadie, whom Sadie held up to the horse's nose. He seemed to smell what it was and stretched his head for it after a scrutinizing look at Abigail.

"Now we have him." Sadie said pleased.

"You mean, you have him." On Abigail's reply, Sadie gave her a smile.

"Then come with time." Sadie had the horse on the bit to Bob and bound him a few feet away from the nearest tree firmly.

That was done. Now they had more carrying surface and could carry much more food. And not only that, Sadie was glad to finally be in possession of a jacket and not freeze to her bones. Her limbs thanked her immensely. Likewise, she was glad to know Abigail in warmth. They both didn't had an easy time. Before Sadie turned to Abigail, she prepared something for the two horses to eat.

"There is also a fireplace in the house, where we are protected from prying eyes." Shortly thereafter, Sadie and Abigail headed for the hut.

"You should listen to me," Sadie said while the two were in to warm up something to eat over the fire, that they had found in the pockets of the hunters.

"What?" Abigail gave her a puzzled look.

"If something would happen ... The Pinkertons, the bear. You have to run when I tell you, Abigail."

"Nothing happened."

"But if-"

"No. Whether I stay or not, that's up to me alone."

"Abigail, you have a son. I want to prevent something from happening to you. You understand?"

Impenetrable Sadie's brown eyes looked into the blue in front of her.

"I know, Sadie. I'm grateful for that." A smile flickered on Abigail's lips, which was enveloped by the flames of the fire.

"You don't need to."

"Of course. You have already done so much. Don't be so modest." When the words left Abigail's mouth, Sadie couldn't hold back a grunt.

"Yeah, that sounds like me."

"I'm serious, Sadie. Without you ... I don't know." Abigail shook her head thoughtfully. "Where would I be now?"

"Probably with Tilly and Jack." The realization was reflected on Sadie's features.

"Don't say that. Probably still in Milton's clutches."

"But Arthur ..."

"Arthur would have done his best. But without your help, who knows what would have happened that day."

"Thank you, Abigail."

"No reason," Abigail smiled, her eyes flashing in the flames. "Before I forget, your revolver." Abigail held out the ratchet to Sadie between a few bites of the warmed corned beef.

"No, keep it. You will need it again sooner or later. Who knows what or who is still waiting for us?" Sadie did not want to risk Abigail not being able to defend herself in the next serious situation, relying solely on Sadie's help. "Besides, it looks good on you," she added with a wink. And Sadie meant it that way. Did Miss Roberts turn red in the face? In vain, Sadie tried to suppress her smile.

"Stop that, Sadie, that's not funny!" Despite the seriousness in her voice, Abigail was flattered.

"If you say so, Miss Roberts." If Sadie was the type for it, she would have stuck out her tongue to Abigail. Sadie's reaction was followed by an amused shake of the head.

Silence overcame the rectangular room in which the two women silently ate their food. Sadie could not complain, she had eaten far worse. Plus, she had the luxury of having warmed it before.

"And now your injury." Abigail looked at Sadie appealing as she was just taking her last bite in the mouth.

"You're in a hurry," Sadie said, her mouth half full to underline her statement.

"Is it strange considering the circumstances? Hardly likely."

"Oh, the circumstances. And it's really only the circumstances?" Sadie wiggled her eyebrows. "I was more likely to think that you liked it."

"Sadie! I said you should stop that! "Abigail's cheeks were adorned with a red glow. "Besides, I did not mean it like that," she added with a proud head.

"You're too easy, Abigail." Sadie laughed.

"Well?" Abigail looked questioningly at Sadie without lowering her head.

"Then let get this over with." Sadie sat down on the bed and fumbled with the buttons of her shirt before she stopped in her movement and fixed her eyes on Abigail, who was watching her. "Did they have anything to drink?"

"You mean to disinfect? Yes." Abigail gave her a superior look, a barely visible, sassy smile on her lips. Sadie snorted. That would be fun.

"Exactly, Abigail. That's what I meant." Sadie tried to put on her sweetest smile.

"I thought so, Mrs. Adler." Now Abigail was standing right in front of Sadie, a bottle of whiskey in her hand, giving Sadie a deliberate look. "Now, if you were so kind, could you please lie down?"

"Why yes, Miss Roberts." Sadie licked her lips before looking at Abigail. Abigail reflected her amused look with sparkling blue eyes. Then she leaned back, opened another button and lay down completely. "Let's get to work."

"I'll do this for you."

"I know."

"Good."

The old lyre, dab, disinfect and clean with water that they had previously boiled out of the snow. After that, Abigail used the blanket again, which was starting to look very battered even though she was less than a week old.

Sadie hated running around as a cripple. Apart from the gunshot wound, Sadie had to be careful not to strain her left arm too much. The fall had left its mark. She tapped a nasty bruise.

"Are you hurt?" After all the thoughts of what Sadie was carrying around, she had never once asked about Abigail's well-being. The bad conscience sneaked through Sadie's guts.

"I'm fine." Abigail looked sincerely at Sadie, a lovely smile caressing her lips. This relieved Sadie immensely, not to forget her conscience. Still, she would have liked to ask Abigail earlier. "Do not worry," she added after a few seconds, as if she knew what Sadie was thinking. Sadie nodded her thanks.

Sadie felt drained. The cold up there was anything but gentle to the two women and Sadie felt the tiredness in her limbs. Not even the food seemed to strengthen her. The day had barely begun and yet so much had happened. 

It had to be noon, by now the day had broken in, the sun was hiding behind thick gray clouds and made the mountains look dull. After the events that day, Sadie had expected no other weather. The sun would have been disturbingly unsuitable after the last few days had been just as bleak. It was the death of the boy Nick, who still lingered in Sadie's head. Everywhere they were persecuted by the dead. Young men, like Nick or Lenny, who lost their lives for nothing, lost. How anxious Nick had looked ...

"It's like back then." Said Abigail. Seconds passed until she continued talking, Sadie raised her head and looked at Abigail from under her hat. "But it feels completely different. We just lost two people." Jenny and Davey, Sadie recalled. "The thing in Blackwater ... they did not make it. To make matters worse, we were persecuted by the government. Like now. But ... how can it be that so much changes in just one eye blink?" Abigail's eyes searched for answers in Sadies. Answers Sadie could not offer her. She, as the woman who had lost everything in one night. Sadie knew only too well what Abigail was talking about.

"I dont know."

"We'll probably have to get used to it." Abigail ran her hand over her forehead, through her loose braid and looked lost. Apparently the day was a bit melancholy on both. Sadie watched her sympathetically.

"Sadie ..." Abigail seemed undecided as to whether she wanted to continue talking. Sadie studied her for a while. "I do not know if the Pinkertons have followed us so far. Last time we were lucky. I doubt we're just as good this time. They'll find us in Colter." Abigail had not said it aloud yet, but Sadie sensed the direction of the conversation. She took a deep breath, her lips pressed into a line. "Maybe we should-"

"No."

"I understand that it is difficult for you. But-"

"No but, Abigail."

"Please listen to me. I-"

"I'll check the horses again," Sadie said, getting up abruptly. 

The air in the room was fresh, sheltered from the wind but half of the roof was missing, but Sadie seemed to be running out of breath. Even the smoke emanating from the fire did not seem to be connected with it. Part of her regretted leaving Abigail like that.

She opened the door and the wind hit her face abruptly. For a moment her breath caught in her throat, so icy and unexpected did it hit her. Quickly she had caught herself, pulled up the collar of her jacket and wrapped her arms around the body. The fir trees danced in the wind, gusting the snow from their needles, lending visible particles to the wind and showing their shape.

Sadie grabbed the packed bags Abigail had stored under one of the tents and approached the horses. To be prepared, she shared the luggage between Bob and ... He had no name. At least Sadie did not knew it.

"How about ... Arthur?" Sadie cocked her head and looked at the horse. His eyes looked at her intently. "Arthur, then." She stroked his neck and patted him off encouragingly. 

After Sadie had provided the two with everything useful, she decided to return to Abigail.

The time outside the four walls, that had seemed so tight at once, had done her good. But even with the jacket, she felt the cold dragging slowly against her, the wind always his strongest henchman.

The hills before her were as white as ever, the storm had done a good job, the snow was high. Sadie knew why she had chosen this place to live. As cold as it was, it was so beautiful.

On the horizon, a few birds caught, their way led them over the mountains. Sadie followed them until her eyes lost touch and stuck to the hill. A single tree stretched in the air. She narrowed her eyes and tipped her hat a little higher to see it better. 

Stop. That was not a tree. Stoned in her walk, she stared at the spot that made her feel uncomfortable in the abdomen.

After a felt eternity, where she stayed there, her nose began to run and dripping wet on her upper lip, it moved. Sadie could just make out the way the rider turned his horse and then disappeared behind the hill. Damn it!

She ran, everything else was forgotten, like the pain that gnawed at her upper body and the freshly doctored wound hopefully not ripped open again.

"Abigail!" She screamed. "Abigail, we have to get out of here right now!" Sadie stormed through the door and stood face to face with Abigail. Sadie clawed at Abigail's right wrist and felt a jolt of pain running through her left arm as she tensed.

"What's gotten into you?" She asked seriously, an aghast expression on her face.

"No questions, they found us!" Now something on Abigail's face seemed to be happening, and she looked up in shock at Sadie's face. "Go!", Spurred Sadie.

Abigail looked over her shoulder as if to make sure she did not forget anything. A few seconds passed while she stood there thoughtfully. For Sadie it was more than that, precious time. 

Then Abigail remembered and pushed Sadie through the door. The two hurried to the horses, Sadie directed Abigail to Bob and swung on Arthur, every hint of pain was stubbornly ignored.

Sadie waited for Abigail to ride ahead, but this seemed unsettled and slowly let Bob bustle. "Where do we want to go?"

And Sadie knew what she had to do. Without hesitating and giving her mind time to think, she gave Arthur the heels and rode ahead, followed closely by Abigail.


	5. To Hell And Back

Was it the fate that challenged Sadie? At the thought a laugh went trough her throat. She had never had a chance, but always rebelled. Just to be confronted with it ever again. Everything that barked through her bones every day, animating her veins with fire, and tearing her mind under control. The woman she was today. Because of the events not so long ago.

What was the worst part about it? Sadie had never had a choice.

But it had not always been that way. It has always been hard, that was true. Living on a mountain was anything but easy. It was always cold, the hunting trips could end frustratingly in a blizzard and the stomach growled a day longer. The work had to be done anyway. Horses that wanted to be cared for. Firewood to survive the night at the highest temperatures. The best part of all was that no strangers got lost there. So Sadie and Jake had a lot of peace from the outside world and had no fear that unwelcome guests wanted to use their belongings. Oh, how foolish she was.

Although it was not Sadie's fault. Who could impose this debt? No, no. The circumstances. It went way back, to things Sadie had never touched before and people she had not known. Dutch and his friends. The incident in Blackwater and not to forget Colm fucking O'Driscoll. All this was the beginning of a rope that had slowly wrapped around her neck, without Sadie noticing. Until the noose snapped shut her throat. It was already too late.

The pigs had forfeited. Colm. Even Dutch has lost everything that once was important to him. Sadie was not left out of it. Abigail. John. Arthur. No one got away with it. That's not how life worked.

Before Sadie's inner eyes she saw the flames burning down her house, mirroring the hell-fire in her pupils. She blinked, and in front of her there was nothing but rubble and ashes. Remnants of her own.

A bitter feeling crept through her body fibers. Her home was nothing but rubble. Beside that, everything was in place, as if Sadie had never been away. As if every moment Jake should stand smiling in front of her and tell her to come to the warm house. Because it was cold. Whatever else, it was always cold up there. Without exceptions. Already his caring and soft expression would have made Sadie warm. She would have told him to feed the horses quickly and then come to the house every minute with supplies of firewood. But just as Jake was, he would have turned to Sadie and done the work with her.

A sniffle escaped Sadie. Only then did she notice that tears had come off and running hot down her cheeks. Not a second later, the trail of tears was stinging cold. That was not her home anymore.

She looked around for Abigail and nodded toward the barn. So they would spend the next nights there. The horses got going and the two rode purposefully towards the new accommodation.

Sadie's thoughts rolled over. It was a nightmare. But if that meant escaping, it was worth it. For Abigail.

The stable doors were open with a slight jerk. A creak as the door swung open made Sadie clench her teeth. That was not there before. She tried not to focus too much on it and led Arthur into the cabin. Everything else was as if she had never been away. Buckets were on the left side, one full of horse feed. The water jug, on the other hand was empty. The ground was muddy and it dripped from the left half of the roof. Sadie remembered that it was leaking before too. On the right side stood a stack of sacks, next to it an old, unusable cartwheel. A rusty anvil and a barrel in the corner next to the water pitcher. But despite everything there was enough space in the barn.

When the horses stood in the box it was unusually quiet around them. Sadie did not have to look up to know that Abigail was studying her closely.

"What is it?", Sadie asked monotonously.

Seconds passed, in which Sadie listened to her own breath. Then she looked up. Abigail still looked at Sadie, her arms tight around her body, cheeks flushed. From the gloss on her upper lip, Sadie realized that Abigail's nose was running too. As their eyes met Abigail shook her head slightly and dodged, probably fixing one of the many haystacks scattered indiscriminately on the floor. Did Sadie made it difficult for her? Sadie didn't want Abigail to turn away from her without a word. After the last conversation, however, Sadie couldn't blame her. If it were for Sadie, if it had not been the spy on the hill, they would have been somewhere else long ago.

"Abigail ..." Sadie started to voice her thoughts.

"No. It's all right. I know." Sadie was suddenly interrupted by Abigail's soft voice, accompanied by a wiping hand gesture.

"No, I want you to hear that." They had been traveling together for a few days now. "You're the reason why I'm doing this, Abigail. If it were up to me, I would have been somewhere else. And if I was dead now, I don't care." 

It was true, as Sadie said. What was she doing there? This ranch was not hers anymore. But she didn't tell Abigail that she was happy to be with her. Not alone and in constant surveillance of her demons, who looked inevitably over Sadie's shoulder and whose breath tickled itching over her neck.

Abigail's face changed, for a moment she seemed hurt, but what Sadie thought she saw disappeared the next moment, showing her caring.

"I know it's hard for you. We had no choice."

"And if they find us here too? Our tracks are probably scattered all over the mountain." Sadie wanted to be damned if everything ended where it started. Irony of fate?

"Do not say that."

"What happens then?!" Sadie demanded harshly. She wanted to hear it. Up there, they were trapped, a shot monkey in the wilderness would have a greater chance of surviving than they. The mountain surrounded her like a wildcat.

"I do not know, Sadie! I do not know! "Abigail's voice was louder than Sadie had expected, she almost stepped back.

A strand fell over Abigail's eyes and attracted Sadie's attention. Silence overcame the stable again. In her chest, Sadie could follow her heartbeat. She was upset. And the woman in front of her ... Reflected her exact well-being. They both were at the end of their strength and yet it was Sadie who started a fight. The little, hurt Sadie. Where did the fire go, or was it extinct at that time? Sadie knew it was a bad idea to visit the ranch.

"Listen, Abigail. I do not want to argue with you. There's a lot of shit going on around here and that's the last thing we need." Sadie tried to read from Abigail's eyes. "Let's hug each other?" She tried to joke and approached Abigail with open arms.

"You've totally lost it." Abigail meant it that way, Sadie could say that, and yet she took the last few steps and dropped into Sadie's arms. 

Sadie felt like it was the first time in years they had hugged each other. Her cheek brushed Abigails, so gentle and warm, full of life. Sadie wondered if Abigail had noticed.

"Thanks." It did not refer to Abigail's words, though Sadie made sure it sounded exactly like that. And Sadie knew, as Abigail broke away from her and held a guarded smile on her lips that Abigail had understood her anyway.

What was going on? Was it fear that crept into Sadie's mind? Once she knew this feeling. For months there had been nothing but merciless fire in her veins, pumping and spurring incessantly. Something else Sadie did not know anymore. Even after her revenge on Colm and the fat man with the beard. But one was missing. Micah. Sooner or later, she would catch him, Sadie swore.

But now was not the time for big revenge plans. All that mattered was to shake off the Pinkertons and get out of the mountains as fast as possible. Avoid cities and live in the wilderness for a while. Until it was safe. At least just as safe that they could use the streets without falling into perpetual persecution mania.

However, Sadie could not say how long they were stuck up there. Fortunately, there was no shortage of provisions or a missing blanket in the future. May Nick and Tucker rest in peace. The two had helped them much more than Sadie could have guessed. It was a shame the men had to die for it. Sadie was more than thankful to them.

What mattered now was that the agents did not find the two women. Sadie still suffered from her injuries, a fight they could not win. Possibilities of escape? Unavailable. Up there, they were trapped. But Sadie would rather jump off the next cliff than get caught.

Her mind wandered once more to Abigail. She could not bear this sight. The picture of them standing next to each other at the noose, Abigail's eyes slipping through the onlooker crowd, seeking help, and remaining on Sadie's. Her breathing, which spurted out of her throat and was audible even over the gag. She would think of her son and of John. Everything she had left, everything she had ever wanted. Sadie knew that Abigail would like nothing better than to settle down. Finally enjoying a life in freedom. Genuine freedom. Far away from wild shootings and crooks. That was once, Abigail wanted to leave that behind. Together with her family.

And Sadie wanted nothing more than that for Abigail. She would make sure that Abigail came home safely. Fate could kiss her ass. Sadie was a woman of her word and once she had promised Arthur to take care of Abigail and her family. She would do that. She did.

Sadie squinted at Abigail, who was sitting across from her, she just looked into the void, like Sadie before, and then she closed her eyes. Took a deep breath. In the barn, after all the time, the smell of hay and horse was still visible, softly it embraced Sadie's nose. The hooves of one of the horses, Sadie could not tell if it was Bob or Arthur, knocked on the floor. She peeked out from under her hat and eyed them. Her bob looked down at Sadie as if he were innocent. Shaking her head, Sadie grimaced. The other one just bent his head to retrieve a few loose stalks from the ground. A beautiful horse, dark, his mane growing wildly over his neck and falling almost over his eyes. Like Arthur, when he had not been to the barber for a long time. Which breed did he belong to? Compared to Bob, Sadie could exclude Turkmen. But ultimately she did not want to judge. His eyes met hers. Slowly he winked at her. She raised her eyebrows challenging. 

Well, what do you want?, she thought. Sadie knew exactly what he wanted, as he was nibbling at the hay.

"All right, Arthur. I'll give you what you want." Sadie sighed and leaned to her feet.

As Sadie walked toward the bag, she caught Abigail's puzzled expression. She was probably wondering if Sadie had spoken to herself and was starting to go crazy. That could have been good, but did not apply this time. Walking past, Sadie smiled at her and practically watched Abigail think. After Sadie had picked some apples from the bag, she divided these just under the two horses. She kept one for herself.

"Do you want to?" Sadie asked Abigail, holding the apple visibly in front of her chest.

This negated with a shake of the head and Sadie then bit off a generous piece, juicy and crispy. Audibly she chewed on the apple, Abigail's eyes fixed on Sadie.

"Do not overdo yourself Missy." Sadie said between another bite of her apple and remained her gaze steadfast. 

"Sadie, you're talking nonsense." Abigail hung her head. Abigail probably wanted to say more, Sadie could tell, but decided to keep it short.

"What makes you think that?"

"You're hurt, we're both up here to our limits and ..." Abigail stopped talking and carefully raised her head to face Sadie's face.

Sadie knew exactly what she wanted to say. And you're in the place where you lost everything. Abigail was not wrong about that. But she was fine, as good as it was possible. Her mind was in one piece.

I'm fine, Abigail. ", Sadie soothed. Abigail studied her with raised eyebrows. "Look, I'll introduce you to someone." Sadie headed for the horse, she moved to stand next to him and reached under his muzzle. "Abigail, this is Arthur." He circled his head as if by command and let himself be stroked by Sadie. Amused, Sadie watched as the knowledge crept slowly into Abigail's head.

"Wait ... you called him Arthur?"

"Yes, fits like a glove, doesn't it?" Abigail was still staggered, switching her eyes every second between Sadie and Arthur.

"I ... guess so?" It should not be a question, but was clearly divided as such.

"Don't you want to say hello?"

"I think that's not such a good idea."

"Come on, he doesn't do anything." Sadie stroked his nose and rummaged through his wild mane. "You see?"

Uncertain, Abigail got to her feet and took a cautious step forward. Then followed the next and the next, her pupils fixed on the horse. Her eyes slid to Sadie's, who gave her an encouraging nod. Arthur remained calm and did not show it. At arm's length, Sadie held out her hand to Abigail, which was reluctantly seized by her.

"Do not worry," Sadie said.

Abigail's eyes ran over Sadie's face. A thin smile built on Sadie's lips. Gently this was returned by Abigail, she dodged Sadie's gaze unceremoniously and looked unusually restrained.

Sadie led Abigail gently the last few steps in her direction. Then they stood together in front of the sealed box. The horse watched the two sharply.

"And now you can touch him."

"Better not, Sadie. I'm glad he lets me near him. That's enough for a start, do not you think? "Abigail seemed to notice at that moment that her hand was still in Sadie's, but Sadie came before her. 

Before Abigail could act, Sadie tightened her grip on her soft hand, her palm quite warm despite the cold, and gently led her into Arthur's direction, careful not to make any frantic movements.

She murmured reassuringly to not frighten Arthur. Until Abigail's hand was on his nose and Sadies rested on Abigails without letting go of her fingers.

The next moment Sadie looked her in the face, Abigail's cheeks were surrounded by a reddish glow. Both eyes met. Time stood still. Sadie swallowed.

Suddenly, both of them startled and jumped in the opposite direction. Arthur had wildly pulled his head back and blew loudly with his nostrils. The pulse felt Sadie hammering to her throat. But was it really just Arthur? She shook her thoughts aside and gathered herself.

"Are you all right, Abigail?"

"Yes ... only Arthur can not stand me."

"He just wanted to annoy you, you know our Arthur." Sadie said it as if she meant their Arthur. Abigail just stared at her in surprise and shook her head with a smile.

"Maybe you're right," she answered.

The rest of the day the women spent setting up the barn. The bags were at hand on the nearest wall near the horses. The most necessary was stowed on the horses, in case it would be a raid and everything had to go fast. In the middle of the barn they had built a small camp to keep the flames as far away from the walls as possible. Each next to a sleeping place for one of the two.

"Looks like a real home.", Abigail said and looked at her built home. "At least it's not more or less than usual," she added after a pause.

"You really miss the cabin." A raucous laugh broke through Sadie's throat.

"And how." Abigail grimaced at the pretty face. "I mean, it's not bad ... And we have a roof over our heads. But a home? "Her eyes met Sadie's, who looked up monotonously, and she spoke quickly. "Sadie, I didn't mean to …"

"It's alright. I feel the same way." Sadie watched Abigail's facial features relax and her pupils studied Sadie attentively. "How are you, Abigail?" Sadie asked to finish the topic.

The woman in front of her looked down and was lost in thought for a moment before her eyes met Sadie again.

"I can not complain." Abigail's voice bore the truth, but Sadie heard the uncertainty in her. Sadie gave her a meaningful look and did not need to say anything so that Abigail could understand her, who was doubtfully fumbling with her fingers. "I know what you're thinking. But I'm as good as you, Sadie."

"Then everything is fine."

"It is difficult. But look around, what else is left for me? "She gestured in all directions. "What else is left for us?"

"In my or your words?"

"Yours."

"A bunch of shit."

"Exactly." Abigail sighed audible.

"But when did not we escape from a hopeless situation? We have come this far. And I will not give up, just for a few idiots walking around in a suit and make one on state justice." No way. Not Sadie Adler.

"You're right, Sadie. That doesn't look like you."

"Right," Sadie agreed. But her smile weakened. "If they come after us and find us, then you have to run while I stop them." Sadie's face hardened. "No ifs and buts, Abigail. There is no hope up here."

Abigail stroked exhausted over her face and shook her head wearily. "I told you ..."

"Please ... Abigail." Sadie whispered. "Promise me."

Sadie could not say what it was all about, that Abigail agreed. Maybe it was her eyes or the voice that made her way smoky, sad over her tongue. In Abigail's facial expressions, however, something did happen, her face lost all tension, and the dull glow vanished from her eyes. Abigail moistened her lips and studied Sadie for a moment before speaking.

"I do it."

"Say it."

"I promise you to walk when they find us." Sadie could feel that the words came rather reluctantly over Abigail's tongue. But she was satisfied.

"Thanks." Abigail's mouth twitched in a half smile. Sadie picked up the tips of her braided hair and played with it indecisively. "What do we do now?"

Shrugging, Abigail watched Sadie. "I guess we're sitting it out."

"How exciting."

"Ain't it?"

\--

Slowly the night broke and Sadie decided to leave the barn for a short moment. She opened the big gate just enough to fit through. Instantly, the wind fell over her and fine flakes came into contact with her skin, which shortly afterwards resembled only a drop of water. If they were lucky, the snowfall would cover their tracks even before the pursuers took the track. If they did not have that yet.

Everything was so peaceful in the dark. The fences, the shed, and the firewood stand stood darkly out of the snow, asserting themselves against the night. But the darkest thing in Sadie's eye was the remains of the house. A written story, burned at her feet. A pile of ashes and rotten wood that described her life. Without words.

Sadie stomped through the snow, only the stars accompanied her on her way, they kept her quiet company and lit her the way. But even in complete blackness Sadie would have found the way.

In front of the house she came to a stop. Was it her heart that boomed in her ears? Or the blood that soared through her ears so loud? She dropped heavily to her knees and her eyes ran across the battlefield of a house. 

Almost timidly, Sadie's hand rose and haltingly as if she are thinking about it differently at any moment, she led her fingers to one of the many fallen wooden boards. Slowly, Sadie stroked the structure, felt it, let it sink in on her. Sadie looked at her fingertips. 

The soot. Black, so black, it covered her fingers. She wiped her nose and face with her other arm to stop her tears. But it was too late, she saw everything in front of her blurry, refused to blink and straightened up. That made the tears overflowing.

Angry, Sadie wiped her face again. She turned her back on the house that had once been her home, grabbed a few woods that were neatly stacked under the hood, and disappeared into the barn. Without looking back.

Abigail was already lying on her blanket, Sadie couldn't say if she was asleep, because her face looked the other way. So she stood there for a while, the wood in her arms, her eyes fixed on Abigail's head, and the thoughts overwhelmed her in every possible way. Suddenly she felt overpowered, weak and tired.

Not to waking Abigail, Sadie silently placed the wood next to the door. Her thoughts emanated. It was cold. It would stay cold. Unless she would light a fire. Sadie did not want that. What she wanted was to lie down next to Abigail. Her heat and no other. Out of habit of the last nights, Sadie said to herself. Not because it did her good. Not because Abigail let her forget. And not because she felt good in her arms. Her warm embrace from which she could draw so much of. What she needed, more than anything else. Warmth.

Without thinking, Sadie quietly approached Abigail, a little shy in her gait. She left her blankets on the other side, Sadie lay down on the bare floor next to Abigail and slid carefully up to her. Awakening or worse, scaring Abigail was the last thing Sadie wanted. Gently, she put her arm around Abigail. Sadie felt her regular breath under the touch. Immediately Sadie felt how they could let go. Everything disappeared behind a thick fog and spread, down to her bones. Finally, her heavy eyelids closed and sleep overtook Sadie.


	6. Here With You

When Sadie opened her eyes the next morning, she felt a chill. There was a blanket over her body, Sadie could not remember covering herself, but something was missing. Sleep clouded her mind, clear thoughts were hard at that moment. She turned to the other side and then she realized. Abigail was not lying next to her. Abruptly, Sadie sat up, the sting through her stomach made her hiss. Her eyes flew through the four walls. Until they met Abigail. She sat with her back against the wall and stared back.

"You have to be careful, any quick movement can rupture your wound again."

So Abigail hadn't missed it. How long had she been watching Sadie? There was a queasy feeling in Sadie, as if she had done something wrong with Abigail. If only she had not been tempted by her feelings and slept on her own blanket.

"Will not happen again.", Sadie replied curtly. It was not just about the injury.

Sadie pushed the blanket aside, straightened up, and looked around the room. She looked at the horses, who had caught her eyes and wanted to be fed. As Sadie took a step towards them, she was interrupted.

"I already fed them."

Sadie stopped in her motion and looked up, as if she was surprised. She was not, Sadie would have been surprised if Abigail had not.

So there was nothing to do. Sit out the situation. Her gaze rested on the built hearth, the stomach growling loudly under her layer of clothing. But now was not the time. The smoke would be like a beacon across the sky, visible from a few miles away. They could not risk that. Accordingly, she couldn't eat properly until evening. Now Sadie could feed herself from a box of bread and had to be satisfied with it.

The bread was still to chew, but harder than usual. More than a day and Sadie would have thrown it at the horses' feet. Gradually she began to miss old Pearson. Every day there was a fresh stew from him and everyone had a hot meal in their stomach. At least he had been useful for something.

Old boozer with his shaggy balding head, Sadie thought.

"Do you miss Pearson as much as I do?" Sadie asked to say something, just not to stay in silence. Abigail looked at her. Was she thinking about it?

"I'm surprised to hear that from you." She paused. "But yes, his stews were unique." She cocked her head and started to speak again. "Although it was never really special. But now that I think about it, I feel differently. "

"I know what you mean. And I bet he would have liked to spit in the soup if it hadn't been for all of us. His pig eyes have spoken volumes." That made Abigail laugh.

"You never been able to stand each other, didn't you?"

"He makes it really difficult. Or is it me?" Sadie looked at Abigail. She simply looked back with a smile, but didn't elaborate.

"I'm sure you might have liked each other under different circumstances." Sadie grunted to show Abigail how ridiculous she felt that assumption.

"That can only come from you, Abigail." But what Abigail said was true. The woman knew Pearson longer, and above all, better than Sadie had ever allowed. Abigail was allowed to make that judgment.

"So, do you want a delicious piece of salted meat? I prepare it like no one else. Even better than Pearson." Boasted Abigail, a glint in her eyes.

"I like to convince myself of your cooking skills. Forgotten? Gourmand." Sadie winked at her playfully.

"Don't embarrass me, you are unsettling me and expose me to an impossible pressure. How can I prepare something properly?"

"Maybe that's what I want, so I can tease you with it, how badly you cook." Sadie gave her a challenging look.

"Inhuman." That made Sadie laugh out loud.

"I like the view." Abigail eyed Sadie with a raised eyebrow and looked at the face opposite her.

"But it ain't true," Abigail said, her tone suddenly serious, not strict or the like, but sincere. Sadie held Abigail's gaze upright.

"Okay," she replied after a few seconds, with a thin smile on her face that told Abigail she had understood. 

Part of her, glad that Abigail had said that. Because Sadie felt anything but that. She was an unscrupulous killer. Sadie knew she was a monster. But that Abigail claimed the opposite, Sadie estimated very much.

Abigail sat down next to Sadie, her soft footsteps darting across the floor, catching Sadie's attention. This gift had certainly always been useful in stealing her. She breathed in her clasped hands and Sadie noticed the clouds of breath slip between her fingers and fade away as if she had never been there. Their shoulders brushed at the movement, shortly thereafter, Sadie released her eyes from Abigail's hands and squinted into her face. As Abigail pinned her eyes on Sadie, Sadie avoided her gaze.

"It's going to be a few barren days we're stuck here," she said, distracting herself.

"Mhm.", Abigail agreed. "Tell me about it."

Another silence.

Sadie cleared her throat in embarrassment. And then something happened that she did not expect. Abigail slid closer to her, if that was even possible, and rested her head on Sadie's shoulder. Her breath caught. Slowly, she released her breath as inconspicuously as possible.

In this position they stayed for a while. For Sadie, time passed faster than usual. She savored every second, leaned her head against the cold wooden wall and closed her eyes. Her breathing relaxed and her pulse had dropped to a comfortable level. The only sounds came from the wind outside and the horses in their box.

Time went by insignificantly, no thought was wasted on the place where Sadie was staying. The four walls protected her from the outside world, before the horror that would actually boil in her. But the small, rickety barn withstood the pressure. 

Maybe it was Abigail's presence, maybe Sadie's emotional development. She could not deny that Abigail made her stay easier. Would she have collapsed alone, would she have taken the cliff this time as a way out and taught the coward she once was better, what she had on it? Everything was possible. And yet, these scenarios didn't seem to enlighten her in any way. And that was good. Because Sadie was there, in time and space, with Abigail. Doing well. 

Okay, Sadie had seen better times, the gunshot wound was a lousy bastard, and her left arm still ached with some movement. But apart from all that, she felt better than she should have imagined in such a situation. With every evil going on, there was probably some balance, something good. As hard as it could be. As hard as it was to accept that and then let it happen. A broken soul was not healed. It took time, a lot of time. Sadie had licked her wounds and she still did it daily. The fresh blood did not quench for some time. But the iron taste still weighed on her tongue. Until it was just a scar, it would take more time. 

And slowly, slowly, Sadie could accept that too. Would that make another person out of her? Sadie thought it was too late for that. She had lived through her changes. One of the many things it probably needed. Sadie couldn't imagine where she would be today if she were still sitting on this rock in her grief. Like a nightmare she couldn't wake up from. But this dream changed. Wanting to show her the new facets of life. That not everything was cruel in this world. Even if Sadie had been holding on to it for a long time.

Now one finger after the other loosened, very careful and not too fast. Because the fall could be deep. Sadie feared this fall, more than anything else. And if you had asked Sadie, she would have said she was not afraid of anything. No more. This little big deal, however, could probably destroy her for a new one. That's what Sadie was today, shaping her character like clay. 

And yet it was Abigail who crept gently and unexpectedly into her heart. That goes way back. Abigail had never stopped believing in Sadie, had seen the strength in her even before Sadie knew something like that exist in her. Then there was Sadie, who had a weakness for the caring mother and wife. Not to mention that she would never miss a neat shootout. Another reason why Sadie had freed John together with Arthur from his lousy back then.

Left to die. That went too far even for Dutch. Where was the man who had taken her in and offered her a home? The man with a dream they all wanted to pursue and live together. Then something like that. Sadie did not want to care about that. With Arthur, however, she got along from day one. 

He was a hard-boiled guy, always saying what he thought. He was certainly too harsh for some. But Sadie appreciated that about him. The conversations with him, Sadie could always demand a lot. John was his brother. No wonder Sadie was the first who promised Arthur, to get the guy out of jail and bring him back to his worried wife. Sadie would never forget this moment in life and certainly not the nerve-racking shootout! That was a lot of fun on that day. None of the jerks even knew how to handle his shooting iron and could not hold their breath in the least. At the thought Sadie crossed a smile. Good old times.

Sadie turned her head, careful not to make any hasty movements, to see Abigail better, her cheek brushing Abigail's dark hair. A tickle ran over the touched skin and withered shortly thereafter. 

She was sure that Abigail had closed her eyes. Because her long eyelashes remained in place and without once shrug down. Her nose was scarcely red, but Sadie didn't miss it. In Sadie jammed the desire to stroke her sweet cheeks. Like not too long ago in Valentine. 

She admonished herself with everything she had in it. Sadie still couldn't explain why she was being persecuted by this feeling. This strange, crafty feeling. It would ruin everything! All that was sacred to her and will be. She could not let that happen. So she fought against this craving and eventually won. 

Presumably only because Abigail was moving in her position and it was running cold on Sadie's back. What the hell did she do there? Sadie almost choked on her own spit and an audible gasp vanished from her throat.

That made Abigail sit up and give Sadie a look. Sadie dubbed the whole thing with a big smile that was supposed to be coquettish, but more like a grimace. On Abigail's face appeared her caring expression, not without the crease between her eyebrows.

"Don't worry, Abigail, I'm fine," Sadie said before Abigail could open her mouth and ran her hand over her face. As it must have delivered a great show again.

"You're becoming more and more puzzling to me, Sadie Adler." smiled Abigail, her face was right in front of Sadie's at eye level, less than half a feet away. Her blue eyes winked at Sadie and shone in the insulated room without any further light.

"Oh yes?" Grinned Sadie.

Abigail leaned on Sadie's knees and leaned forward until her forehead touched Sadie's hat. "Yes," she breathed.

And then she disappeared again. Still afterwards, Sadie felt her warm breath on her skin and while Sadie sat there and swallowed hard, Abigail found her place next to Sadie again and nudged their shoulders playfully. Sadie certainly did not let that sit on her, and it was the distraction she needed at the moment, so she emulated Abigail, like a stubborn child who did not want to give in. In fact, this went on for a while, neither of them gave in and wanted to keep the upper hand. A nice trait that Sadie had never seen before at Abigail. That made her smile.

"What is it?" Abigail asked between another blow.

"Nothing, I just thought that I don't know you so relentlessly. The purest fighter nature. Maybe I should give you my other revolver, then we'd be better off." Sadie joked with a laugh.

"You're crazy," answered Abigail. "If you could stop now, please, so that we have this behind us, I would be obliged to eternal acknowledgment."

"Abigail, you started. Wouldn't it be fair to leave the last blow to me? "

"I don't think so."

"You're showing me some new pages of you, Abigail Roberts. I wouldn't have expected that."

"Well, there are still some of those," she said with a raised head.

"Which ones, for example; you as a born gunslinger?" Sadie took her hat and turned it on Abigail's head. "Looks good."

"That's what you want." Abigail snorted.

"You're not entirely wrong," admitted Sadie and the thought of how Abigail stopped Milton in his games pushed herself into her head again.

"Mm, what am I hearing?" Abigail pulled the Colt out from under her jacket and aimed at the clear wall in front of them. She mimicked shot sounds, not close to it, but it did its part. Sadie laughed out loud.

"I could not have imagined it better.", Sadie said between the laughs.

Abigail straightened her hat and looked at Sadie from under the top. Sadie had not lied when she said it looked good on Abigail. Not to mention that it was Sadie's hat and she liked the sight of it even more than she already did. As so often, a few strands had lost their way and fell into Abigail's face.

When Sadie's laugh had stopped, they shared another look. "You stealing my thunder, I'll need it back." Sadie grabbed her hat from the other.

"That I can do best. Steal.", Abigail replied with a flash in her eyes.

I know, thought Sadie, I know.

It has not escaped her notice how Abigail, on her soft soles, was also trying to get something out of Sadie. She still did not know if she liked it or not. What Sadie knew was that she had become accustomed to her presence all the time and did not want to miss her. Was not that the answer to all her questions? Sadie did not know any better at the time. Like so much not.

"I'm sure of that," said Sadie instead.

\-- 

When Sadie angered the fire, her stomach was already growling loudly. She could hardly wait to finish a warm meal. Quite apart from that, she was cold to the bone. Abigail and Sadie had tried to keep themselves warm in which they were sitting together, but even that did not work after a while. 

No wonder, in the minus degrees, Sadie thought. 

Sadie herself was no longer used to it and from time to time she wondered how she could stand it then. The answer was obviously easy.

While Sadie was at the fire and set the tinder on fire, Abigail took care of the horses.

"The food is not the only thing coming to an end," Sadie announced, as she fumbled a match from the pack and studied the box between her fingers with a grim look. When there was no answer from Abigail, Sadie looked up and found Abigail with her back to her by the horses.

Only with suspicion did Arthur let her near him. Bob, on the other hand, seemed pleased with her company and nibbled at the edge of her jacket. After all, Abigail still had Bob as a friend. 

Good old Bob, Sadie thought.

"Abigail." No reaction. "Abigail." Sadie waited. Then Abigail turned halfway to Sadie and looked at her apologetically.

"Excuse me, how was that?"

Sadie couldn't stifle the laughter that made her way unannounced across her lips. As soon as Abigail had turned to Sadie, Arthur thrust his forelegs out, a hollow clattering rumbled through the walls. Startled, Abigail jumped back a meter, dropping the food, while Bob produced a loud gasp from Abigail's unexpectedly hectic movement. Her eyes fixed on Sadie's and Abigail grimaced, one hand placed over her heart, which was probably hammering hard in her chest.

"He still doesn't like you." Sadie laughed.

"Didn't you say, 'it will be'?”

"At least that's what I thought." Sadie bit her tongue to keep from laughing loudly.

"Don't grin at me like that."

"Come on, Abigail, you should have seen." She winked at Abigail. "Serves you right if you ain't listening."

"Very funny." Abigail pouted before she turned into a smile and flashed her teeth.

"Well, look who's smiling."

Abigail shook her head. "I give up. But we ain't done yet." A wry smile played on her lips and made her eyes sparkle.

"That's not a problem for me." Challenging, Sadie's eyebrows hopped up, a sly grin on her face.

"Just wait. I'm the next one who has something to laugh about." Sadie shrugged ignorantly with her shoulders at that.

"We'll see," she replied, lighting the wood, the light of which reflected conspiratorially in her eyes.

The flames reached over to the wood and danced slowly over the structure, spreading until Sadie felt the warmth on her face. Delighted, she held her stiff fingers over the fire.

Shortly thereafter, Sadie opened the barn doors so the smoke would not pollute the entire room. She only hoped that no one would notice the light effects. Because from the outside you would certainly be able to make out the flickering of the flames. A nocturnal hiker was the last thing they needed.

"There ain't much left. If we're lucky, it'll be enough for a week." Abigail informed, burying her hands in the bag as she went through the supplies.

"What do we still have?"

"A little fresh meat, which we found at the hunters. Should be enough for this night. Otherwise cans, dried meat and vegetables." Abigail pursed her lip as she looked up and made a thoughtful impression, but she said nothing.

For Sadie, it was time to recover quickly. When they ran out of food, they had to hunt. She had done it many times before and could certainly kill a hare. Maybe a stag. Everything that was close by. In spite of everything, the risk was high, to be discovered or to leave traces. Something that Sadie wanted to avoid at all costs.

Did the Pinkertons find the dead hunters? What would they say, Sadie wondered. Declare Abigail and Sadie guilty even though the bear was right in front of their nose? Sadie wouldn't put it past them.

Before she ran off in her thoughts, Sadie grabbed an empty can and shoveled snow into it. The can was placed by her next to the fire, so they had something to drink later.

Abigail sat down to Sadie, both set to roast their flesh. Sadie winked at the horses, then across the room. The room was filled with the scent of the fire and wrapped heavily around her nose. Swaths rose and buried themselves in the four walls until they found the exit and wandered into the night. That had to be enough.

When her eyes met Abigail's, Sadie noticed they had been watching her. A sad smile stretched across her lips. Abigail's eyes wandered to her piece of meat, perhaps into the flames. Sadie could not make it out exactly. Her pupils reflect the glow of the fire that magically caught Sadie's attention. Mysterious and yet playful.

"How ... was he like?" Sadie could see Abigail's lips forming words, but her focus was on Abigail's eyes.

After a while, Sadie noticed that Abigail was staring back and the spoken words burst out into her consciousness. Abigail waited patiently for an answer.

"He- He was …," stammered Sadie. She felt taken by surprise. Deep, she drew in a breath and gathered herself.

"You do not have to answer me if you do not want to."

Sadie wanted it. But could she?

"Jake was wonderful," Sadie said. Here, a shiver ran over her body. Abigail's eyes were fixed on her face, following Sadie's lips. "He gave me so much and was always at my side."

Abigail smiled. "Was he charming?" She asked, lost in thought.

"A lot. Why did I choose him?" Sadie grinned. It was unfamiliar, be so open about him, to talk about her feelings. But it was strangely okay. "The life up here was more peaceful than you imagine after all that happened. But it's true and it was the best decision of my life." Sadie paused. "Without him ... it ain't the same anymore. Sometimes I think he has to come through the door at any moment and find us here." Shaking her head, Sadie dismissed the thought. She had long come to terms with his death, but her mind wanted to play Sadie pranks. "He would have liked you, Abigail." Sadie's eyes spoke sincerely to Abigail, a sad smile playing around the corners of her mouth. 

Abigail nodded slowly, uncertainly pulling her lips and searching the room for something Sadie could not see.

Shortly thereafter, Sadie heard a sniff from her direction. When their eyes met again, Abigail turned her head to one side and slipped her sleeve over her face.

"I'm sorry, Sadie. I..."

Sadie knew what was going on, she did not have to explain, let alone apologize. Abigail had to think of John. That she had probably lost him, as Sadie had her Jake. The woman in front of her had seen Sadie in her worst condition, yet Abigail showed nothing but strength for the few days they were traveling. The circumstances did not permit otherwise. Small moments of weakness were fine, even needed to be used to getting up. That was the real strength behind all this.

"No, Abigail, do not apologize." Sadie tried to speak as emotionally as possible, which was not one of her strengths. "It's okay. Let it out, if you have to. I'm here when you need me." Sadie remembered exactly how Abigail had said those words to her. I am here if you need me.

"No, Sadie, it's not okay! Look around. Why do I burden you with my loss when we are here?" Abigail's voice trembled, but her words were more than clear. At the last word she made an all-encompassing movement. 

It should not be an attack on Sadie, she was aware of that. Abigail wanted to indicate much more that it was most likely Sadies every right to grieve. She did that too. However, a lot of time had passed and made it easier than on the first day. Abigail, however, had lost John only a few days ago. Not sure if he lived or not. Added to that was the distance to her son. Sadie bet everything she had on Tilly. And she was sure Tilly was doing nothing but the best to protect Jack. She might seem weak, but she was anything but that.

"It's your right as well, Abigail." Sadie sat upright. "Look, I've spent a lot of time dealing with my grief. It was a hellish fight. But being here with you makes it easier for me. So believe me when I tell you it's okay."

Abigail's reddened eyes ran down Sadie's face, searching for signs that might contradict her words. But she found none. And Sadie saw it in her face at that moment.

"Do you believe me?" Sadie whispered.

It was important for her to hear that from Abigail, she should pronounce it herself and taste it on her tongue. So she would not doubt it again.

Abigail glanced at her and nodded. "I believe you. Thanks. "Her voice was hoarse and barely louder than Sadie's.

Sadie returned her nod knowingly, her mouth twitched into a half, sad smile.

In the meantime, the meat was cooked and they went to dinner. Abigail struggled with her food, presumably she had run out of hunger in all the agitation. Sadie could only sympathize with that. But Abigail did her best and finally ate.

It's important to keep the strength up, Sadie thought.

"Can I help you with your bandage?" Abigail asked shortly after taking her last bite.

"Since when do you have to ask?" Sadie dubbed her slight wonderment with a mischievous tone and expression on her freckled face. 

Abigail shrugged. "I did not want to surprise you." Her eyes were still red and shimmering towards Sadie. She waited for an answer.

"Yes. Please." Sadie gave her a gentle smile.

Then Abigail helped her change the bandage, dabbed the spot around with water, and then tied a piece of the blanket back around Sadie's hip, which was doing well as a bandage. 

Again and again, Sadie looked up at Abigail's face, her gaze steadily focused and Sadie could only guess the concern behind her mask. Sadie's pupils slid between Abigail's eyebrows and an imperceptible smile crept into her face. Right there, between the brows was again the little wrinkle. In silence, Sadie let Abigail did her voluntary service and did not pay too much attention to her warm fingers, which were so gentle in their task. tickling over Sadie's skin.

"Looks like the healing process slowly begins," Abigail announced with a satisfied expression on her face.

Aside from the wound being torn open, Sadie's body did everything in its power to heal. The temperatures demanded a lot and consumed many reserves. Reserves she needed. The last thing Sadie wanted was to get sick by lack of it.

"Slow sounds good," Sadie replied, sarcasm heavy in her voice.

"What do you want to do?" Abigail rolled her eyes and though it was a rhetorical question, Sadie shrugged. "Be glad it heals. It could be far worse. I've seen men who suffered from gangrene and had serious infections." When Sadie did not answer, she continued. "You can imagine how bad that must be. Nothing that you want to suffer …"

"Got it, Abigail. I'm lucky." Sadie sighed. "Even if it feels anything but that," she muttered. Abigail gave Sadie a look. 

"Exactly," she said, looking deeply into Sadie's eyes.

\--

When the two women lay down that night, each of them lay on one side of the fire. The last flames scurried over the burned wood and soon would be only hot, glowing embers.

Noise clouds passed over Sadie and she watched as the swaths wound up until nothing was left of them. They had been lying down for ten minutes, but Sadie's eyes would not close. It was not the cold, at least not yet. Her thoughts did not want to rest. 

Sadie turned her head and her eyes darted to Abigail. The thin smoke played with her perception and ruffled her field of vision. The heat tickled Sadie's cheeks and left a pleasant feeling. Abigail was lying on her back, her head turned to the ceiling. Sadie couldn't tell if she had her eyes closed.

Then, contrary to Sadie's expectations, Abigail turned her head and, as so often, her eyes met Sadies once more. For a while they looked at each other silently. Sadie did not know what she could say or how. But then Abigail averted her eyes and assumed her original position. Did she keep her eyes open? Silence.

Sadie was like she had heard her name and fixed her eyes strained on Abigail, tried not to miss her soft words, which might as well have been an illusion.

"Sadie ... I'm cold." Her voice was steady, louder than before and clearly understood, but Sadie heard an inconspicuous uncertainty in her tone; or was it imagination?

Abigail dropped her head to the side and her eyes found again Sadie. She looked at Abigail as well as before, the previous words fading slowly in her mind. Was that a call? Did Abigail want to imply that ...?

"I could ...", Sadie started uncertainly.

"Yes," Abigail interrupted.

"Okay.", Sadie answered and sat up slowly, glancing at Abigail again and again to make sure that Sadie was not doing something wrong or that she was changing her mind.

But Abigail just looked at her blandly. Once, Sadie even thought she had seen a hint of a smile on her lips.

Sadie slid her blankets to Abigail's side and cuddled up to her cautiously. The alarm bells were ringing in her head. It did not matter to Sadie. Abigail needed her. How Sadie needed Abigail. Cold, lonely nights were anything but bearable. That, on the other hand, was reassuring. Her sleep was softer. She knew someone was there. That Abigail was there. And no one could do anything to her. Because in Sadie's arms Abigail was safe, Sadie would take care of that. With the knowledge, Sadie was reassured.

"Good night, Abigail." whispered Sadie.

"Good night, Sadie," whispered Abigail back.


	7. Meteorites

The days passed, dreary the women spent their time exclusively in the barn. With exceptions, because now and then Sadie and Abigail stole behind the wooden facade, where they would be protected from view, and spent time together under the cool night sky. The conversations were deep, frisky or didn't even take place. For even in silence, they enriched their presence. Fleeting glances met again and again, and then made the two of them smile.

One of the most important things was that the two had found time to mourn and talked about Arthur. It was not an easy topic, Sadie had her head down and Abigail was clearly running a tear down her cheek. But it was necessary and liberating. To share ones grief. The man had helped them so much and given them so much.

His face had betrayed Sadie that he carried a lot with him. Incredible loss. Despite everything, he had never turned his back on his family and had always been there for them when they needed him. It hurt Sadie how it ended. To see him like that. The sunken face, the red eyes running. And the inner struggle that he constantly carried with him.

Abigail had told Sadie stories she had not known. Anyway, Sadie had only known Arthur for a few months and Abigail had known him for five years. A number that would freeze and never increase. One eye laughed, the other cried and Abigail told the listening Sadie stories of better times.

"It's like a dream. I still can not believe it. When did it start; in Blackwater? Maybe even before that. Or after that, in Shady Belle? Swamps never have anything good to signify." Abigail studied the clear night sky, the stars innocently looked back and gave the black sky a comforting effect that weighed in full unresolved mysteries.

"I've asked myself that question hundreds of times and never found an answer. I start to doubt that there even is one." Sadie snorted. "But the time with you has brought me back to life. Even if it all came to an end too quickly." Sadie's eyes found Abigail. "I can only guess what this bunch of people meant to you."

"I'm glad you're with me, because you've certainly been part of this pile." Now Abigail looked up as well, in Sadie's brown eyes, which shone so brightly despite the darkness. "I meant it when I said you were the bravest woman I know. All the time with you, it just proved me. And I firmly believe that, if we want, we can get out of this in a hurry. You deserve better, Sadie. You really do." 

Sadie tried to keep eye contact. Looking away would have been so much easier than glancing into those sincere eyes that clearly reflected the sincerity of Abigail's words.

"I'm afraid it's too late for that." Sadie didn't know what to say, and finally avoided Abigail's gaze. She looked down at her feet, the snow under her boots had come to a pulp, and the mud was shining on the tip of her boots. 

All of a sudden another pair of boots pushed into her field of view and then Sadie felt a soft pair of hands on her cold cheeks, which raised her head and gave her eyes no escape. Only Abigail's blue iris in which Sadie was allowed to lose herself in.

"Do not say that," Abigail said. "And don't you dare thinking about it."

A soft smile overtook Sadie's lips. That was reciprocated by Abigail.

"You thought I didn't know you so well, did I?" Abigail nudged her reddened nose. "Caught." She seemed to be thinking for a moment, Sadie could tell at the way she tilted her head to one side and let her eyes drop for a moment before Abigail spoke again. "Promise me." Sadie started to answer, then she was interrupted, with open lips she looked at Abigail. "Please, Sadie." Her voice was quieter than before.

Sadie closed her lips, briefly pressing them to a thin line before nodding. "I promise you, Abigail."

"Thank you," she whispered and then her hands were gone, the iron cold broke on Sadie's cheeks and fought her way back within seconds.

Sadie's eyes followed Abigail and she let a silent sigh into the night air, which just as silently evaporated in front of her eyes.

The silence was no less pleasant than before. But Sadie felt a change. Suddenly she had the urge to say something. As if there were a thousand other things that Abigail needed to know to take on and dismiss Sadie as a promise. There was something in Sadie's facial expressions. What a nonsense! That would not heal her soul either. Wouldn't it? Then it was Abigail. As if she did not already have enough grief. She shook the thoughts aside.

"Don't look so bent."

"That wasn't my intention."

Sadie was not sure if she had understood Abigail correctly, but it sounded like, "I know." Whereupon she held out her hand. 

"Come on, we're going in," Abigail said and let Sadie in uncertain whether she had misheard.

When they found their way back to the barn at night, neither of them found many words. Instead, they lay in a deep hug together until they finally fell asleep.

Sadie still found it unbelievable to be in this place. Together with Abigail. She was amazed what fate might do to her. It was as predictable as ever. Anything could happen, Sadie had devised dozens of scenarios, and yet probably not one of them would hit it.

The most important thing at the time, however, was that they had their peace and quiet there. Was luck good for them? Or had they been already found and would be visited as soon as they weighed in safety? The thought made Sadie gnash her teeth. Her revolver was loaded, before they catch them alive, Sadie knew how to deliver a showdown.

But that was not all. For a week was almost over and the supplies were running low. Which meant that they had to hunt soon to keep their strength at bay. Renewed teeth grinding. Sadie did not want to leave Abigail alone in the barn, as little as with her hunting. Both could be a mistake or just the right decision. And one shot could draw unnecessary attention, as it had been with the bear in retrospect.

"The supplies are almost exhausted. I should go hunting, see if anything can be found. Or loot. Maybe we'll be lucky and find forgotten food in Colter. Hunters are more often up here. And since the last visit there, months have passed." It was already the next day and Sadie fumbled thoughts lost on her hunting knife. She had to do something.

"I know." Abigail stopped, seemed to be in thought. "But it's too dangerous. Anything could happen."

"That doesn't change the fact that we need food."

Abigail chewed on her lower lip. "And if we disappear from here? Don't you know a secret way up here that will surely lead us out of this mess?" Hope swung in her voice.

"Then I would have come up with it a week ago. So no, I don't know any secret ways." As much as Sadie wished, up there they were in a dead end.

"Then we put everything one card." Sadie raised an eyebrow and looked at Abigail in surprise.

"You can't be serious."

In the normal case, this idea could have come from Sadie, why it felt unfamiliar for her to appeal against this proposal. Besides, she had never considered Abigail a daredevil - a role reversal? Sadie was surprised that Abigail was not willing to wait a few days longer, not even addressing Sadie's injury.

"Why not? Either, we stay here and risk being discovered, or we flee and may possibly disappear undetected. "

"You say so, Abigail. Possibly. "

"Come on, where's the Sadie out that shrinks from no adventure?"

"She has since the incident in Valentine taken a lot of things and had to rethink. You saw, they almost had us. I doubt we can do it again. "

"Presumably, they left us here to starve or were of the opinion that we would freeze to death. It's pure suicide up here. The men know that. We are two women. What will they have thought?" 

Abigail had a point. Expectantly, she looked Sadie in the face, but she did not show anything.

Thoughtfully, Sadie closed her eyes and weighed the possibilities. Something could go wrong at any time. And she was tired of waiting. For what? That the death overtook them? That was not Sadie's style.

"You got me. But we do it my way."

"I wouldn't have wanted anything else." Abigail's eyes sparkled with joy, but she tried to show herself casually.

Then they packed their belongings to leave that night.

"You said there was only one on the hill. Maybe we are lucky and the bastards are traveling with a small group. If they are still looking for us. "

"Whether one or two or hundreds, makes no difference. I would not bet on that. We're straining our luck here, Abigail. "

"Luck, are you saying?" astonishment swung in Abigail's tone. 

"I just wanted to express myself understandably. Luck does not exist. You can or you can not."

"I would have understood you." Abigail studied Sadie out of the corner of his eye. "Don't think I fell on my head."

"I wouldn't dare."

"I wanted to hear that."

The moon rested in the sky and soft flakes crept out of the night sky while Sadie opened the stable door.

"And you are really sure?" asked Sadie, just to make sure of the answer she already knew.

Abigail's gaze was steady and her nod was solid. Without doubt.

"Yes," she replied, her eyes flashing under the stars-covered sky.

All right, Sadie thought, nodding back and leading Arthur by the reins of her recent lodge. Followed by Abigail and Bob.

"Before we go ..." Sadie said, leaving the sentence unfinished.

Sadie headed for the barn, followed by a pair of eyes. With her boots she heaped the hay out of the boxes into a pile, picked up the old oil lamp hanging by the box, and tried to shake the leftover oil out of the lamp. From her pocket Sadie pulled out her matchbox. One was left.

She let it roll between index finger and thumb, overwhelmed by her thoughts, before she flipped it up and dropped it at her feet. The fire gave birth before her eyes and grew briskly. Deeply, Sadie sucked in the air, the smoke filling her lungs, leaving a smoky taste on her tongue. It was done, nothing could stop the angry flames any longer. Soon the whole sky would be covered with smoke.

Before her eyes, Sadie saw the oil lamp being brought down. "Oh, Micah, you idiot," she echoed through her ears. Sadie, who jumped frightenedly away from the man, throwing tangible things at him to keep him off. Micah, who saw it as a game, knew he had the upper hand and scolded her an O'Driscoll. Dutch and Arthur admonishing him and pushing him away. But it was too late, the lamp fell to the ground as Micah pushed the table aside to reach Sadie and burst. Mercilessly, the fire expanded in seconds and fell over her house. But ... That did not bother Sadie. Because this house had no value for her anymore.

The lights in Sadie's pupils, the dancing flames that reflected in her eyes as they did then, would redeem this place. 

Sadie turned away, crackling in her ears. She could picture how the barn collapsed, keeping the exhausted house in all its separate parts company. As she stepped out of the barn, she found straight to Abigail's eyes, which looked so meaningful into hers.

"Let's go, then," Sadie said, swinging onto Arthur's back.

Sadie did not have to look back to know that Abigail was following her, or that she looked back more than once, seeking out the untamed flames, seeing the glow in the sky that would still be visible from a few miles away and lay like a protective cloak around the barn. Sadie, however, stared straight ahead. She left it behind and never wanted to go back there. This story was completed.

\--

At the next opportunity, in front of Colter, they rode to the north, where they would stop at the edge of the mountains behind the Spider George. 

Sadie's eyes ran over the mountains, trying to look through the trees and track down an alleged attacker. The darkness and snowfall made it hard to see anything at all.

From time to time Sadie was as if she were trapping a movement between the trees, but after a long look, nothing was apparent. 

Probably animals, Sadie thought. There was more to that than enough. The main thing, not a bear. The last one was enough for her. For a lifetime.

Not long and they crossed Deadboot Creek. They made a short stop at the water and let the horses drink from the river. That night they had not come to boil the horses' snow.

Sadie glanced over at Abigail, looking for a sign that she was feeling the same way as Sadie. But the dark-haired in front of her, only let Sadie guess how she felt.

When Abigail met Sadie's eyes, Sadie turned to her hat and shook off the snow before putting it back on. Abigail watched her and stroked through her dark, wet with white flakes covered hair. Her braid hung loosely on Abigail's neck, loose strands framing her face, and had long since been drenched in the constant snowfall.

"I feel like we have a chance," Abigail said against Sadie's feelings and she did not know if it surprised her. The woman had become more confident every day.

"You could be right," Sadie replied as she looked around. Sadie did not want to admit that she felt differently.

"They would have found us long ago if they wanted." Sadie could not say if Abigail really believed it or wanted to appease Sadie, because she could saw the restlessness by Sadies looks.

"You're right." A pull in Sadie's stomach. "Let's move on before that changes."

A smile appeared on Abigail's face. Her hand went through Bob's mane before she made him run.

The trees around them made Sadie feel a little safer, though she could not help feeling watched. An uncomfortable tingling sensation in Sadie's abdomen, which was getting stronger and let her preparing for the worst. Her fingers twitched, ready to pull her revolver and give a lesson to the next who would come near them.

This feeling intensified when Sadie thought she saw something hanging between the trees. This time really. Because she saw a little light, Sadie could not imagine, that was slowly gaining in size. 

To see better, Sadie leaned forward and narrowed her eyes tight. She turned to Abigail, pulled the reins around Arthur, and held out her arm as a sign that Abigail was about to do the same.

"Can you see that?" Sadie asked, her voice muffled.

Abigail raised her eyes to Sadie, who nodded her head in said direction, following her gesture. Sadie watched as her eyes widened and her pupils hit Sadie again.

"Do you think they have found us?" Sadie had to make an effort to understand her.

"I don't know.", Sadie answered and got off the horse. "You stay here. If something happens, flee and don't look back." Without waiting for an answer, Sadie marched through the high snow.

Her posture was crouched and she stalked from tree to tree. If she was not seen, Sadie had an advantage. Under their soles crunched the snow and wanted to draw attention to themselves. 

Sadie made a face, the snow would ruin everything!

She came closer, her fingers encircling the grip of her Colt. The light grew larger, and she noticed that it was not moving. A fire or a torch were excluded. Sadie stopped in the corridor and listened. 

All quiet, only the creaking of the trees in the wind. No votes. She looked around the area, surprised. Nobody to see. Still, it could be a lousy ambush. Sadie, however, was prepared. Her feet carried her on. Until Sadie came to a standstill again.

In front of her was a hut, now Sadie could see it. The light came out of a window. Skeptically, she put her tongue over her teeth. A trap? 

Sadie knew the area. She had not seen this building before. In the meantime they had to be far to the west of the Grizzlies. Sadie had not gone there often. 

Last, Sadie remembered, it was a magnificent stag that drove her to this area. A tough hunk, the animal had probably kept her on track for over an hour. 

It was worth it, Sadie Thought. That evening, Jake and Sadie shared an unforgettable dinner.

A hut, however, has not been under Sadies eyes. But it was difficult to tell if Sadie had touched exactly this spot. In addition, their attention was on the deer at the time, not on the environment.

Alright, she thought, all or nothing. A card, Abigail had said. With that Sadie started moving and aimed at the house.

As Sadie approached, she noticed that the window was missing slices, an old cloth hung over the opening and covered the top half. A miserable attempt to keep the cold out. To the right of the door a skunk's fur decorated the wood and next to it a threatening trap, already rusted.

A hunter's cabin? Sadie wondered.

The façade was supported by a few wooden beams on the outside and gave the impression of falling into place at any moment. On the roof, the snow collected and common icicles decorated the eaves.

Sadie paid attention to every step she took, her heart rate inching, thoughts of what might expect her rushed through her mind. 

Sadie stood with her back to the wall, between the window and the door. She took a deep breath, peering through the gap that the cloth did not want to cover. 

No shadows in the light, let alone any sounds except Sadie's breath in her ears and the thump of her heart in her chest. Through the window Sadie could make out a bed, but even that was empty. 

Light is burning, but nobody is here, she wondered, what does that mean?

It's the middle of the night, something was wrong.

Her head flew in all directions. Then Sadie broke through the door, revolver raised and loaded. To face she got a deserted room. Slowly she let the gun go down and inspected the space. Many, useless stuff. A table with a burned candle. A bloody board, including a map and above a meat knife. Old meat and an already opened preserve.

A picture of a feast, Sadie mocked.

Conspicuous, however, were the bottles, which were distributed in the room. On the fireplace, as before. On the table and to the right of Sadie on the wall. 

So a drunkard, she thought. 

Sadie's eyes returned to the fireplace. Then the smell of food is pressed into her nose, which was not about the meat on the table.

It was a stuffed pot, still steaming, to the left of the fireplace. Her stomach growled as if on command, while the queasy feeling she still carried with her spilled over and she found herself in a squatting position. Maybe he'd left on a night's walk and would reappear any moment.

Sadie scurried to the fireplace and slid her hand over the ledge until her fingers sensed the pack that had struck her so furtively. Premium cigarettes. Without hesitating, Sadie put it in her pocket. She would not disappear without something useful. Her eyes scanned the room. Something edible, something edible, she repeated in her head.

The dark shelf, on the left wall, behind the bed, caught her attention. Vessels, unusable, too much ballast and more trash. Except ... canned salmon, perfect. Sadie held out her hand and stowed it unceremoniously, her eyes fixed on the window, expecting someone to come by at any moment.

She scanned the papers nailed to the wall. In the quick, she made it possible to read "Travel by train" on a poster and saw a bottle of olive oil at the foot of the bed. No use. That's it, Sadie thought, only scrap and more scrap.

A pair of ropes, another trap, but nothing to eat. But before Sadie disappeared, she fumbled for a box of matches. In vain. Cursing, Sadie opened the door, careful and thoughtful, she looked in every direction where the danger could wait.

Out of the corner of her eye, Sadie caught a movement and her heart jumped. She had seen it, that could not have been imaginary. This time really! Sadie swallowed. It came from the direction where Abigail should wait. Slightly lateral, but nonetheless from this angle. But ... If anything had happened to Abigail, she would have screamed, right? Sadie would have been the first to know. Or was it a quiet robbery, had the homeowner been lurking and was the women one step ahead? Uneasy thoughts shooed through Sadie's head. Everything was to be expected in these forests. Everything was to be expected in this damn country! That which Sadie had learned to love so much should always be doomed to her.

Sadie was much more disturbed by the fact that she was frozen right in front of the entrance to the house, she was at the mercy of a curious few eyes. Hell, he had certainly discovered Sadie long ago! Her pulse hammered Sadie up to the neck, her fingers straining convulsively around her revolver, her breathing shallow. Sadie stared mistrustfully at the point where she had last identified the movement. Her eyes failed in the darkness, so she listened intently. Shaking her head, Sadie gave in. There was nothing. He had to be pretty smart. But Sadie was not misled. Not with her. This game could play two.

Step by step, Sadie struggled through the high, treacherous snow. With each crunch, Sadie grimaced. Cursed! But she had to go ahead, go to Abigail and warn her. If it was not already too late. 

Great, Sadie, she thought, so much on the subject of keeping Abigail waiting instead of taking her with me.

The only reassuring thought was that Abigail carried one of her revolvers and Sadie knew that Abigail would not be afraid to use it in an emergency. She had experienced it more than once. Nevertheless, it did not change the fact that the culprit might have overwhelmed her undetected.

Sadie searched the darkness, her eyes wandering over the tree trunks, watching for fresh footsteps in the snow. A second later, she saw it again, a sinister shadow that lingered among the trees and aimed at Abigail's direction. Sadie sensed her chance, maybe it was not too late. 

Before she could think it over, Sadie ran straight for the figure, dodging the trees. The stinging in the side was, as usual, ignored. The snow slowed her down, but Sadie did her best to reach her goal. Her legs and feet had meanwhile been soaked through, but all she was focusing on was the lurking man in front of her.

He must have caught her sniffing and wanted to repay Sadie now, by finishing off Abigail first and presenting her before her eyes, like one of his hunting trophies. Sadie could smell it exactly. He was probably a nutcase and would even eat them. In the train of thought, Sadie opened her eyes in horror. She could not let that happen, end up in the stomach of a hillbilly, who was she ?!

A few meters left, then she would have him. His dark border between the woods suddenly did not seem so threatening. A mischievous smile spread over Sadie's face. 

He'll be surprised, she thought.

The moment he turned around, because he must have heard Sadie, which was not difficult with all the snow and the gasp that came from Sadie's throat, it was already too late and Sadie took him by surprise and brought him down the dive.

On impact, it took her breath away, even when Sadie's fall was intercepted by the other's body. The pain on her wound screamed, but that was secondary. Snow was sticking to her face and her hat was off the ground somewhere. The body under Sadie turned to free himself and fought his arms free to throw them in front of his face. At the same time, Sadie tried to sit up in a sitting position and, just a moment later, pulled out her revolver and put it between his eyes. 

"No wrong move, my friend, or you ..." ... catch one. But Sadie stopped abruptly in her sentence and stared at the person under her, her mouth left unfinished, half-open.

"Sadie!" Shocked yet relieved, Abigail's voice broke the silence. Abigail dropped her hands to one side and took a deep breath. "Did you scare me, don't do that again!"

Meanwhile, Sadie searched for her language. Unbelieving, but deeply relieved, she looked down at Abigail. She did not notice that her gun continued to point at Abigail, Sadie was frozen. Abigail, on the other hand, seemed to notice, how not, and surrounded the barrel with her cold-reddened fingers. She pushed the weapon aside and stared at Sadie with her shimmering eyes. Only now did Sadie realize that she had pointed the Colt at Abigail, right between the eyes, ready to squeeze. Panting, Sadie dropped the revolver.

"I'm sorry, Abigail ... I didn't mean to ..." Sadie stuttered in horror of herself.

"I'm fine, don't worry. It's alright," Abigail assured her. For Sadie, it was anything but 'okay'.

"No, I ... I almost- I wanted …," she stammered on. The sentences did not want to come out of Sadie as a whole, she was too shaken.

"I'm fine," Abigail emphasized, every word clearly spoken. "Hey, look at me," she demanded. Sadie's eyes went to Abigail's. "Do you see? I'm still here." Swallowing, Sadie nodded dumbfounded.

"You're still here." Sadie repeated. "You're still here."

"Exactly. Under you in the cold snow and very much alive. "Abigail took Sadie's hands in hers and squeezed them. "It's really okay." The last words whispered Abigail meaningful.

Sadie's eyes ran over Abigail's face. But as always, her eyes were nothing but sincere. Then Sadie looked at the night sky, her eyes brushing the tops of the firs that pointed upwards as if to point Sadie the direction. On her face, the flakes fled out of the atmosphere, burnt on her skin and left untold tears. Looking at Abigail again, she looked silently back as the snowflakes settled on her dark hair, forming a luminous contrast.

Without losing any more time, Sadie got to her feet. "I'll help you up," she said, holding out her hand to Abigail. "What did you have to do here? Why did not you stay with the horses, Abigail? "Sadie asked as she pointed her hat, she did not want to sound harsh, but her voice was one step ahead of her.

"I just wanted to check. It took you so long."

"Everything could have happened, you know that!" Sadie meant the bullet that almost left her barrel.

"Do you know how it is, not knowing to wait for something? Do you really think you're the only one who can take care of herself, Sadie?" And now Abigail got more and more biting.

"I think it would be best if I took the vanguard and you stay away from it at a safe distance."

Sadie was sorry to fear Abigail's life. Whether she was near her or in safe surroundings, no longer mattered. Although the latter was most likely to agree, contrary to her feelings. She attracted the disaster and could not agree to pull Abigail into it.

"That's not how it works, Sadie, in case you missed it!"

"If you had not been, then we would not even have this conversation!" Why did Sadie's voice sound so loud in her ears?

"I just wanted to help, but if that's what you want, I'll leave you alone the next time and you can see how you can manage on your own should something happen!"

"I'll manage. Thank you for your concern." A sarcastic laugh crossed Sadie's throat.

"Idiot.", Abigail hissed under her breath, which was ignored by Sadie skillfully.

Without another word, the two saddled on the horses. The only thing that got exchanged was bad looks. Sadie could feel Abigail's eyes piercing her like a knife. But Sadie never once looked back to check on her, let alone give her that satisfaction. No, apparently Sadie had been wrong and could not even rest assured that Abigail was following her instructions. Not a damn time since they were on the road! Sadie did not know what she would have done if she really did ... she did not want to think about that, shaking her head she dispelled those dark thoughts.

Sadie drove Arthur up the mountain to the right of the hut. From there they would have a better overview of the area. At the same time Sadie breathed in her cold hands to generate a little warmth in her fingers. Meanwhile, the wind brushed the mountains and made them tremble. Her legs and feet were wet and ice cold. How did Abigail fare? She was recently buried under Sadie in the snow. Gritting her teeth, Sadie finished the thought. That was not her problem.

As they approached the summit, something dark appeared in front of them in the snow. At first, Sadie tapped a tree stump. Sadie jumped off the horse and once again the forgotten bullet wound came in. She grimaced, drew in a sharp breath, hoping Abigail would not notice. Of course, Sadie refused to pay any attention to her, instead she walked to the edge of the small mountain.

Before she reached the stump, Sadie began to ponder, followed by a strange feeling. Because that before her was no tree stump, she became aware. However, she did not want to draw any conclusions, but on her tongue she already tasted the dead.

Upright in the snow, quite confused with an old stump, he sat upright in the snow. Slowly, Sadie circled the body and peered down at him. His long, ragged beard lay like a fan over his chest. The hair already gray, like the beard. The upright posture made him seem alive and barely suspect that it was a dead man. In his hands he carried a carabine repeater and kept his watch on this mountain forever. The face was already black and red, the cold had quickly done it to him. Even his tracks had long been swallowed by the fresh snow.

Sadie turned to the slope. In front of her was a wonderful view over the mountains and forests of the Grizzlies revealed. Clouds covered the sky, but now and then a few stars crept into view. The white peaks of the mountains showed their true greatness and boasted with their majestic sight. This was the last resting place of a settler. Almost melancholy, Sadie turned away and examined the hunter, who would probably have taught them in his lifetime to do a runner. Smirking, Sadie leaned down to him. The rifle...

With both hands she grabbed it, the frame was cold and stuck to her hands. His rigid grip did not let up. Sadie put more effort into her pull and heard his frozen joints throbbing. As he gave in, Sadie grimaced under the groaning noises. What had caught him, that it had played him so bad? She did not want to know.

Curious, Sadie examined the rifle, checking the magazine for bullets and readiness. Everything intact and four shots. With a swing, Sadie wrapped the rifle over her shoulder and headed for the horses. And Abigail. Under her hat, Sadie glanced in her direction, but in the next second she remembered and got stubbornly on the horse.

Their path led the women back down into the mountains and directly onto a path near Lake Isabella. Sadie looked furtively from the saddle through the area. If anyone is around who sees them, they were lost. In the darkness, however, Sadie could hardly look into the distance, which did not keep her from trying again and again, narrowing her eyes, hoping that would help. Was Abigail sitting in her saddle just as restless as Sadie? She would never know.

What Sadie was most worried about was Ambarino's border to West Elizabeth. Who could tell her that it was not guarded by a bunch of bored Pinkertons? After the recent events, Sadie began to wonder if all this had been a good idea. Maybe they should have just stuck their situation out on the ranch. Now she had even quarreled with Abigail and was too stubborn to admit that she had felt something like fear for a long time and she was eaten up inwardly by worries. Countless "what ifs" had clouded her minds.

Sadie knew what it felt like to wait, in the uncertain. But Abigail simply had no business in open combat. She was a mother, damn it! How could Sadie ever forgive herself if something happened to her? She had given Arthur her word then to take care of Abigail's family. And that's exactly what she did. Come who may. Sadie was ready.

\-- 

At the next opportunity, they retreated from the path and held themselves west at the foot of the mountain. A collapsed hut crossed their path, long since overpowered by snow. Only the stove was halfway intact, next to a missing pipe, which originally reached the now fallen ceiling. A broken coach pulled the picture off. Sadie let Arthur slowly trap and looked around. No chance, the mountains blocked this way.

She turned and soon after they found themselves again on the path, along the outside of Lake Isabella. Then it finally went uphill until they came to a fork. Sadie knew that the first path would lead to a dead end and only give them a view of Ewing Basin. Not passable with the horses. The rock was too narrow for them to pass through.

So it went uphill, southwest. Then came the slope that was to lead them to Ewing Basin. Like a garment several fir trees besieged the landscape and kept the travelers quiet company.

After a short time, they roamed the deserted village, Sadie paid close attention to foreign movements. Who knew if the Pinkertons were not so cunning and had taken shelter there or were other rogues lurking there? Dangers came from every angle. Something Sadie had learned all along. Again and again.

Sadie could feel the temperature rise slowly and something like anticipation spread throughout her. She was sick of the cold. The resulting numbness in her fingers and burning on her skin. The cunning wind and the treacherous wetness. Her feet were still icy. That would soon be over, Sadie thought.

Without an incident, they brushed the edge of the abandoned village and rode along the path between the trees and mountains. In the distance, the snow cautiously broke away, giving glimpses of green, fertile land. Sadie even caught a few rabbits, leaving their footprints in the thin snow and disappearing into the trees, startled by the tramp of horses. Unfortunately, at that point in time the hunger came in and reminded Sadie that she had not eaten. They had been traveling for a few hours and were soon to rest. The morning dawned already and gave the sky magnificent colors. They were all exhausted. As she thought about it, Sadie realized how lucky she was. Escaping unscathed from the mountains. The whole thing made her a bit uneasy, but Sadie tried to put up with the feeling.

Once again, Sadie steered the woods and maneuvered through the trees, which were no longer exclusively fir trees, and used them as camouflage to protect themselves from prying eyes.

Sadie looked around, only trees and green space in sight. There they should rest for a few hours. The cold had munched on her powers, she felt weaker on an empty stomach than usual. That's why Sadie took the opportunity and stopped. The forests had to suffice as protection. Inwardly, Sadie fought with the thought that any moment a Pinkerton or bounty hunter could come around the corner. Weakened, however, their chances declined. Why a short break was not wrong.

"We'll take a break," Sadie said.

She slipped out of the saddle, tied the horse to the nearest tree, and removed the blanket from the cradle, which she spread on the floor. Sadie did not expect an answer.

Sadie searched for a few sticks and a handful of dry leaves. Then she lit a small campfire with the utensils. The shadows of the flame danced across the mossy ground, giving nasty grimaces to the tree trunks.

The food was in short supply, Sadie went to the canned salmon and silently handed Abigail the other half. This, however, shared with Sadie the crackers that were left. With that, they had used up all their food and relied on hunting.

The silence was unfamiliar. Abigail's voice was missing. The boisterous conversation by the fire or behind the barn under the busy night sky, where the stars were their only listeners. During this time with Abigail, Sadie had become accustomed to her voice. Her sound was almost as reassuring as the wrapping of her arms, soft and protective.

Now only the crickets seemed to be open for conversation. Sadie, however, turned, bent, with her back to Abigail, trying to find sleep. Until it had obtained, was to pass another hour. Then Sadie was finally enveloped by the comforting blackness that was so familiar to her.

\--

Meanwhile, the sun had fought its way up and broke through the treetops. At once Sadie was greeted by warm sunbeams, which laughed happily into her face. Instinctively, she pushed her hat lower in the face. Sleep was dull over her mind and her eyes were hard to lift. But it was time, more time might cost them their lives. 

This thought gave Sadie the necessary drive and she sat up limply. Sadie ran her hands over her face, yawned once and shook her head. Then she straightened up and rolled up her blanket. Abigail was awakened by her activities and saved Sadie the trouble of having to wake her up. After all the two barely had exchanged a word, so it was much easier that way for Sadie. Not necessarily bearable, but not everything in life made sense.

Sadie was about to saddle up when she caught her eye. A dark log, brown and outcropping like a rock. However, rocks were not brown. She grabbed Arthur's rein and walked slowly in the direction where she had made her discovery. Sadie froze in her walk as she revealed what was to be seen before her. Nothing but a bear.

Again? Sadie Thought.

But then she saw it, around it a great pool of blood that testified to a fight. The bear did not move. Was he dead? Carefully, Sadie strode toward him. And it was true, this bear was history. But not only he, no, buried under him was a man. Or what was left of him. His face was no less damaged than that of the last victim Sadie was allowed to witness. In a position as if they were cuddling and being best friends, they were surrounded by a host of trees, the only witnesses, of a bloodthirsty struggle.

Sadie inspected the carnage and discovered the handle of a knife sticking out of the bear. Interested, she closed the distance and gripped the knife with a firm grip. Under the force, Sadie felt the flesh give way and make a sticky sound. Chic, she thought. The knife had a whitish, beige handle made of horn. 

She wiped the blade along the skin of the bear to clean it. Since Sadie was already in possession of a knife, she handed it to Abigail, who was already sitting on Bob, while Sadie made sure that the handle pointed to Abigail. Unnecessarily provocative, she avoided it better. Abigail barely paid any attention to her and silently took the blade from her hand.

\--

Sadie conducted her over the grasses in the Western and saw the Little Creek River in the distance. The two of them then rode in silence to Hilt Shack, a lodge close to the Hanging Dog Ranch.

Immediately memories were awakened and let Sadie breathe out loud. As a two-man army, Sadie and Arthur had taught a bunch of O'Driscoll's to shoot there. They had shot the bastards to the ground. The purest massacre.

Sadie will never forget how she killed the fat guy, splashed his hot blood on her face, sucked itself into her shirt and felt unfathomable satisfaction when she saw the life disappear in his eyes, and Sadie knew he had recognized her. His beard caked with his own blood, making him gasp for breath, but it was too late. Sadie's knife had pierced his chest dozens of times, his belly, his ribs, he should suffer!

When he was nothing more than a lifeless piece of flesh, Sadie had sat down in the chair Arthur had put before her and he was standing in front of her with his arms crossed. 

She had told him that her memories of her Jake were still pure. He had listened to her. Could understand her loss. She was grateful to him. For everything. This man ... Sadie missed him. 

A sense of something unfinished reigned in Sadie, she did not know how to describe it. But Arthur would not come back and Sadie would not reverse the time. His story had come to an end. And now it was Sadie who was allowed to continue in memory of him.

They left the scenery behind, crossed the beautiful, overgrown land, the sun high in the sky, painted in a radiant blue, adorned with fluffy, white clouds. Then they found the main path. That had to be the Pronghorn Ranch, a great spot for a ranch, the meadows littered with lavender. 

Sadie wondered what it was like for people on this property. Probably honest people who did not want to deal with outlaws and earned their bread decently. Sadie could not blame them for it.

After all, it was Owanjila Damm that was within reach. His river line led the two women directly in his direction.

The last hundred meters, thought Sadie.

On the hill, guided by the path, they passed around the great body of water. Sadie could only guess how Abigail was doing. Would they meet John there? Sadie hoped for it and she never hoped. But it would be better that way. Abigail could join him and Sadie would disappear. There was still some open business she had to sort out. Like Micah, for example. Was not it obvious that Abigail was better off with someone else?

John would never have raised his revolver against Abigail. Sadie had once again been guided by her feelings and almost killed the person closest to her. That only showed her how unable she was. Arthur should never have asked Sadie for this. So Sadie was the one who brought evil. A monster, she had called herself before Arthur. And it was true, because the woman she once knew does not exist anymore. Replaced, like a broken, worn wheel, broken on hard ground and stony hills.

The sun shone with all its might over the water, was enthusiastically reflected on it and blinded Sadie in the eyes. The mountains in the background guarded every movement of the magnificent forests. On the opposite side, Sadie watched a wild herd of horses pausing at the water's edge. From the trees came the joyful songs of various birds, talking excitedly to one another.

How long had it been since Sadie had absorbed the tranquility of nature? Even now, it was hard for her to take pleasure in it. Nothing was as pure as it should be. Abigail and Sadie had not exchanged a word for hours, and if they did, it was just for practical reasons.

John, you old fool, I hope you did it. For Abigail. She misses you. She needs her family, Sadie thought.

Then they fit the bridge. In the middle of this Sadie ordered to halt. The hollow hoofbeats fell silent.

On her saddle Sadie turned in all directions. Nothing to see. No camp or fires that would show this. No people. Did he come every day for a certain time, had he left a note or had he really never arrived there? Questions accumulated in Sadie, but answers were denied.

Hastily she got out of the saddle and with a quick step she searched the dark wooden fences of the dam. Also under the stairs that led to the shore. The search was unsuccessful. Grimly, Sadie looked around, hurrying toward the bushes behind the bridge faster than necessary, checking the rocks, the tree trunks and even the bushes for any sign. Damn, somewhere had to be something!

Angry Sadie's eyes found Abigail still sitting in the saddle. She felt as if it had been years since she had last looked into her blue eyes, and Sadie noticed that she must have been watching her all the time. Sadie wanted nothing more than to let go of her anger and switch to a soft facial expression. It would have been so easy.

"Your friend of an idiot is not here." Sadie hissed.

"Watch what you say, Sadie," Abigail replied dryly.

Feeling indecisive, Sadie stood there, saying nothing, and put her hands on her hip, lost. What should they do now? Sadie had been eager to find John there since the border to West Elizabeth, in a whole and well. Her plans rested on his reliability. Something stirred in Sadie's eyes. Abigail's gaze was still dark and fixed on her.

John, is he ...?, Sadie asked herself.

Then it occurred to her why John probably was not there to find him or would ever show up there.

"Abigail, I'm-"

"No, let it be, Sadie. I understand already. You want to get rid of me and I'm just a chain on your leg. Please just leave John out of it." Abigail averted his eyes and signaled to Sadie that everything was said.

Sadie dropped her shoulders. Damn, what an idiot she was!

Abigail put on a mask and Sadie could not tell God what the woman in front of her was feeling. Sadie would understand if Abigail demonized her. It showed Sadie once again how wrong she could act and how good she was at pushing people who were close to her. But could you blame her for everything she had to go through?

She certainly would not have accepted her apology if Sadie were in Abigail's skin. It was an insult that was unforgivable just in these circumstances. The woman was suffering, the wound was fresh and had just probably replaced the uncertain with bitter knowledge. Because John was not there, let alone, he left something behind.

While Sadie froze on the bridge, Abigail headed Bob through the trees and scrub. Sadie watched as Abigail got off the horse and settled down near the bank. 

So wait, Sadie Thought, and hope. 

Reluctantly, Sadie approached her, the horse directly behind her. With caution, as if Sadie was expecting a volcanic eruption at any moment, she sat down at Abigail, a few yards away. Trapped in her thoughts without escape.

Again and again her eyes found Abigail, ran her fleetingly over the inscrutable mask and then fled back to an indeterminate point on the large, confusing land plane. Abigail, on the other hand, did not seem to pay any attention to her.

When Sadie wanted to read Abigail's face again, or at least start a try, she came into contact with the back of Abigail's head. Sighing, Sadie dropped her head. How could she just make it up to her?

Suddenly Sadie heard a rustling, it had to come from the front. Did Abigail want to leave? Sadie raised her head and saw Abigail right where she had been before. Her head had turned to Sadie and her scrutiny was on Sadie.

Then again a rustling and a crackle, as if branches under heavy boots would break. Sadie's head whipped in the direction of the sound. Even before he came out between the bushes, Sadie could make out a figure. And then he stood right in front of them.

"Charles!"


	8. Hello to Sorrow

Abigail jumped to her feet and wrapped her arms around Charles' neck. This triggered a strange feeling in Sadie's chest. Not that Sadie wasn't happy. But she wanted to be the one who was embraced by Abigail with joy. Instead she had offended Abigail and insulted her, only because her own anger Sadie had on herself, had clouded her mind.

Sadie forced a smile that seemed more gimmicky than honest. She was glad that Charles was still busy with Abigail and had not noticed this failure. Then Sadie remembered, got up and gave him a fleeting embrace.

"Abigail, Sadie, long time no see," he greeted, his striking face edged by a smile.

"How did you find us?" Abigail asked, her eyes bright. Was it the sun that reflected in Abigail's eyes and made them seem brighter than usual? Sadie's mouth twisted.

"I'll tell you this later in peace. But what are you doing here?"

"Well ..." Abigail stopped, wanted to look briefly at Sadie, but remembered a better one. "We- I," she corrected, what was silently accepted by Sadie, "was hoping to find John here. Before anything went wrong, he told me to find him here when we get separated." With a slight shrug, Abigail finished her sentence.

Charles looked her over. "I'm sorry. But it ain't too late yet. John is hard-boiled." Abigail gave him a depressed nod. The man turned to Sadie, then his eyes grew big. "What happened to you?" His pupils slid down from Sadie's face to her stomach. 

Sadie followed his gaze and saw it too, her jacket showed a red spot around her wound, which had to be ripped open again.

"Shit," she said. On Charles' face drew surprise.

"You didn't notice it?"

"Yeah. I mean no. The injury is already a few days old, but it had to be ripped up again. "

As Sadie spoke, she couldn't help but wonder if Abigail had missed it or simply had not pointed it out. Sadie was sure that had to have been the latter and a sting drove through her stomach. Which, for once, had nothing to do with the wound.

"I think we have a lot of catching up to do," said Charles.

Tell me about it, Sadie thought.

\--

Together with Charles, the women had sought a suitable place for a decent camp and the night ahead. A bit off the dam, but in the immediate vicinity, so that they could keep an eye on this. Before that, Sadie was sure to leave an unobtrusive message in an adjacent tree trunk if John showed up.

The fire blazed crackling, enveloping Sadie with a comforting warmth. At night, temperatures in the area were down, but the difference to the Grizzlies was enormous and a welcome change.

"Then tell me, Charles, how did you find us? I know that you're a skilled tracker, so you can skip the part." Sadie grinned at him. 

Charles was about to share his sliced food with the two of them, stopped in his motion and raised his eyebrow in amusement, his eyes fixed on Sadie before he offered her something to eat.

"Fine, then sit back, this will be a longer story.", He started and looked around. "You probably know that I had decided to stay with Flying Eagle. It was like that and didn't change. But I knew what could happen. On the same day my gut alert sounded, a brother returned from his exploration and told of a wild shooting in Van Horn and three refugees, one man and two women.

That applies to Arthur and to you, Sadie. That's why I decided that second to break up in order to get to the bottom of it all. If one of my friends needs help, I would be there, I told myself. When I arrived in Roanoke, I found Miss Grimshaw lying on the ground, her body riddled with bullets. She didn't make it." His eyes dropped and he seemed to take a short break in memory of her.

Even Sadie kept her mouth shut, her eyes fixed on Charles, she did not dare to look at Abigail.

"I followed the tracks that led to the mountain. Less than an hour could have passed since then. The tracks all merged into each other, it had to have been dozens. I followed this. When I found Arthur's horse, I knew. My legs carried me over the rocks, then I found him. The last thing he must have seen was the sunrise. And I can assure you, it was one of the most beautiful sunrises I have ever seen. Although I didn't have such a great view as he had, but it was unforgettable." Charles took another break and let his eyes slide over the fire into the faces of the women.

Sadie swallowed hard at what he said. Abigail ran a lonely tear over her cheek, Sadie could see it, because only now she dared to look over. Abigail's meat lay beside her unmoved, and Sadie's appetite had passed.

"I took him with me and buried him decently. Arthur deserved it," he continued. "After that, I set myself the goal of finding the two women. A little later, I got wind of an incident in Valentine. I don't think I have to tell you about it." Charles winked at them. "From then on, it was not difficult to read your track and find you."

"But the Pinkertons, how did you get past them?" Abigail asked.

"The snowstorm must have led them astray. Me too. Otherwise I would have caught up with you before. I found you later, you were one step ahead of me. "

Something stirred in Sadie, like a pinched gear that started moving again, letting the many teeth mesh.

"That was you on the hill ?!" Sadie shot out.

"Yes, but I wanted to play safe before I get to you, you were gone again. In time, I made sure the Pinkertons circle." 

Sadie's mouth was open, now everything made sense.

"Charles, I don't know what to say ..." Sadie heard Abigail say.

No, Sadie did not know it either. This man had prevented the two of them from being found by the Pinkertons. How could she have thought she was so lucky? Sadie knew best that something like luck did not exist.

"You saved our ass," Sadie finished Abigail's unfinished sentence.

"Don't worry about that, it was my pleasure. We were a family. We're still connected," Charles replied.

"But now to you, Mrs. Invincible, what led you to this injury?" He asked Sadie with sparkling curiosity in his eyes.

Sadie bit her lip, her eyes shyly looking up at Abigail as she remembered what had happened.

"Let's say some bounty hunters came and wanted to take care of us. I got caught in the fight, but ... "Sadie's eyes flickered again to Abigail, who was fixing her pupils to the dancing flames.

"Thanks to Abigail, we made it out alive." As Sadie spoke, she kept her eyes on Abigail, and as she finished her sentence, Abigail's blue eyes finally hit hers.

Sadie remained steadfast in her eyes until Abigail turned away. Then Sadie went to see Charles, who was looking back and forth between the women. A milky smile covered Sadie's lips.

"Charles," Abigail began reluctantly, "When you were in Roanoke ... did you- did you hear from John?" 

Sadie listened eagerly, but Charles's stance betrayed enough.

"No, I'm sorry, Abigail. Still, I don't think he's dead. There was someone with Arthur, I don't want to say it was him, but there is a possibility."

Tense, Abigail nodded. Sadie knew that Abigail's heart was torn to live in the uncertain. And hope fueled torment, should John no longer be alive. But even Sadie gave it to think. She did not know John well, but what she knew was that he had already escaped from many delicate situations, and with Arthur at his side, it was even more likely that he had found a way out of the mess where life kept taking. Was John the last one who had seen Arthur alive? It had to be painful to leave a brother behind.

Okay, thought Sadie, and considered painfully what to do next.

Suppose he was alive, where could John hide? Sadie's thoughts led her to dead ends. If he was not alive? She didn't know. Probably back to Saint Denis, undetected. With Abigail. Perhaps. The woman probably did not want to have anything to do with Sadie and was certainly happy when she finally got rid of Sadie. By now Sadie felt like a burden. Abigail had called herself a chain on Sadie's leg. But it wasn't like that. Even if Sadie had let her feel like that. So Sadie had only been afraid of another loss.

But who was she to utter orders? Where she had learned long ago that nothing can be controlled in life, no matter how hard you tried it. No, Sadie was a burden for Abigail, not the other way around. She knew that know. Nonsense, she had known it before, just did not want to admit it. Her anger at John, who had not waited for her, was only her own. Because Sadie could no longer stand to see Abigail in that condition and was to blame. Because Sadie was still a coward, as she was when she did not manage to take her own life.

But that would change, Sadie swore.

The fire had shrunk in half and would soon be extinguished. Time to sleep, gather strength and make new plans. Right in the morning.

Sadie stretched herself in her sleeping place, cuddling under the thin blanket, imagining Abigail to be right beside her. Warm arms wrapped around her waist, making Sadie breathe a sigh of relief and fall into this momentous hug. What Sadie did not know was that sleep had caught up with her already.


	9. Say Something

"Damn!" Sadie cursed, her teeth clenched and her face twisted into a distorted grimace.

Charles looked up at what he was doing, but immediately returned to the needle and pulled the thread through Sadie's wound. He had insisted that this would have to be sewn because Sadie's lifestyle would tear it up again and again. After Sadie finally gave in, Charles did not hesitate long and pulled out the necessary items from his saddlebag.

"Almost done.” Charles muttered between another stitch, with Sadie tensing her stomach.

Even in the cool air, Sadie suddenly became hot, she felt her whole face glowing, all the way to the wound.

Charles's hands were drawn by Sadie's blood, which looked even darker on his dark skin. The smeared blood on her stomach looked as if hundreds of people had left their dirty footprints on her. Sadie chuckled at the thought. As if that dared one.

Charles tapped his hands. "We're through.", He finally said and tapped Sadie on the leg, instantly the tension left her body and her expression softened as well.

Sadie reached into her pocket and pulled out the pack of cigarettes she'd taken. She opened the pack, the accompanying card found in each premium pack, Sadie snapped into the merciless flames of the fire, which blazed beside her and made no hesitation on the piece of paper.

"You do not happen to have a match, Charles?" Sadie asked.

"One, that's all." Charles handed her the package, while he examined Sadie with a critical eye.

The pack was light and jingled when opened, the woods were almost used up. Sadie took one and immediately lit her cigarette.

"What is it?" Sadie asked when she noticed Charles gaze. "Afraid I'll steal some of you?" With a laugh she dismissed it.

"No, I trust you," Charles replied, dropping the subject. Nodding, Sadie blew her smoke into the cool morning.

"Would you like one too?"

"Not now. Ask me again later. "

“I will.”

It was a fresh morning, the sun was behind thick clouds and fresh dew lay over the grass. The water was soothing, even with the mist that meandered across the water, leaving the landscape dreary.

The three had decided to make up for their last supper that went down in the excitement, and break up around noon. Charles had just dealt with Sadie's injury and soon they would be ready to move away from the Owanjila dam, to continue to ride inland. 

They would be sure to leave enough footprints for John, which will not tell an outsider anything. If John showed up there, he should know someone had been there. Sadie did not know if she could count on ever finding him alive again. But the hope in Abigail's eyes beamed over at her and even let Sadie hope for the impossible. In her thoughts, Sadie talked to John so that one day he would be well in front of them.

\--

Sadie had just come back from the lake, cleaning her wound without any help and with a little more effort tied the makeshift bandage around her side. Her thoughts kept coming back to Abigail, who had otherwise done that for her. How her soft fingertips glided over Sadie's skin, almost furtively, and awakened a warm feeling in her. These insignificant touches that expressed so much in Sadie. Sadie was overcome by her thoughts and felt exhausted from work. Or was it her thoughts? She could not interpret it.

Her wound still ached from the treatment, was sore and red, with the dark threads between them holding Sadie's skin together. But also because of her lack of patience and sensitivity with which she had cleaned the wound, Sadie could attribute the pain to herself. 

So she sat back at the campfire, breathing in the smoke and listening to the story of the crackling fire. Abigail and Sadie still barely exchanged a word and Sadie had come to terms with the fact that it would be like this for a while.

"Charles, may I ask you for something?" Abigail asked and Sadie listened inquisitively.

Sadie saw Charles raise his head and look at Abigail quizzically.

"Just out with it." He said.

"Would you help me write a letter?" Slightly ashamed, her eyes slid from Charles to the floor in front of him.

"With pleasure. But I'm afraid we have to go to the next town. I have nothing to write with me." Charles's expression was friendly, showing Abigail that there was nothing to be ashamed of.

Sadie, on the other hand, was thinking that Abigail could have asked her as well, and probably would have done so, if the two were not at war. 

She clicked her tongue. So much for the subject, I've gotten over it, Sadie thought, and would have liked to cut that feeling off.

"Do we want to leave?", Abigail's voice rang, tearing Sadie out of her thoughts.

"Yes, it's time." Charles did not wait for an answer from Sadie, walked the few steps to the fire and extinguished the flames with his boots.

That was her cue, Sadie went to Arthur and jumped on his back.

"I still can not believe you really called him Arthur." Charles shook his head with a sad smile.

"Believe me, that's how I felt, too, Charles." Abigail added.

"Don't pay attention to them, Arthur." Sadie said to the horse and patted his neck.

He shook his head as if to agree with her. Amused, Sadie raised her eyebrows, he understood her.

"I see you've become a horse whisperer. Things seem to have happened in time," laughed Charles.

"You can see it as you want," Sadie sang.

The way they rode, led the three directly to Strawberry. Even if the Pinkertons had lost the track, Sadie was out of the habit of watching for potential spies who roamed the mountains or lounged among the many trees. 

That Charles was with them made a lot of a difference. He was a smart guy, friendly, but he did not want to be fooled with, because the guy was a sly dog. If anything was going to get in their way, Charles was the firepower to counter this. Sadie knew she could rely on the man.

It was already noon, the sun was high in the sky and cast solid shadows over the streets, rock and wood that filled the landscape of which the sun painted a black picture to honor it The tramp of the hooves mingled with the singing birds and the rustling of the leaves, which the wind animated to dance.

"The shots, in the mountains of Ambarino ... What did that mean? I found the bodies." Charles turned to Sadie.

She looked at him, was about to look at Abigail, but stopped at the last moment.

"A boy looking for his partner, who happened to be attacked by an animal of bear and then had to share the fate of his deceased friend. Before the bear could kill him, the beast ran towards us." Sadie made a weapon with her hand and imitated a gunshot. "We did it together."

"And the boy?" Charles wanted to know.

Sadie knew he must have inspected the bodies.

"I redeemed him. At his request. His name was Nick. "

"Nick." Charles nodded his head and looked thoughtful. He probably knew from the time how Arthur the horse must have come to them.

The path made a bend and shortly afterwards Strawberry was within reach. The horses fell into a cozy trap and they passed the busy streets of the city.

"I'll take the grocery store, we'll meet at the butcher." Before Charles could raise any objections, and he wanted to, Sadie had seen it by his gaze, and the corners of his mouth twitching up, she gave Arthur the heels and escaped.

Before Charles would get the idea to leave her alone with Abigail, she had to act. The awkward silence had faded since Charles arrived, after all, it was he who served as the conversation partner, closing the triangle to a new whole. But Sadie did not want to risk being attacked from the feeling of bitter silence, with whom Abigail punished her, as long as she could avoid this.

She dismounted outside the store, untied the reins loosely around the stake, and ran to the store. Paper and something to write. And a new shirt that was in no way inferior to its old one. 

The money was just enough, and the salesman's gaze did not escape her, his skeptical eyes looking over Sadie and his eyebrows contracting as he pondered what might have happened and whether he was required to include the sheriff. Surely he was not used to a woman with a big bloodstain on her jacket shopping at his place. As Sadie left the store, she had twisted her mouth into a smile.

After that, she found herself at the butcher's and was expected by her two companions, Abigail looked up briefly before her eyes fled in the opposite direction. Charles talked to the meat seller, handed him some money, and gave him a handshake.

"We should avoid the cities where we can." Charles said as he led them out of Strawberry.

"No objection," Sadie said. 

"The guys would have to be a few miles behind us if they picked up the track again. But sure is for sure," he added. He was right.

Abigail had not said another word about the letter, which made Sadie ponder. Because she wanted to know what Abigail had in mind. Did it affect Sadie? Was it because of Sadie? Ignorance made her almost insane in the saddle of her horse and Sadie was almost certain that the horse sensed her tension.

"Let's stop at Riggs Station," suggested Charles.

"Okay."

A short distance behind the station, with a view of the railroad tracks and its bridge, Bard's Crossing, they stopped and sat down on the grass. The horses were nearby and grazed under the supervision of the three wanderers.

Without further ado, Sadie handed Charles the paperwork. Sadie would have liked to keep the items and told Abigail to tell her what she should write. Abigail would probably have dismissed her with a dry reply, that she had asked Charles, not Sadie. That would not improve, on the contrary, Sadie would probably make it worse, as before. But Sadie knew what she had to do and that was to give Abigail a little space and Sadie really tried. Because shortly after she had given Charles the things, Sadie turned away and went to the horses.

She did the same to the horses and scraped her foot across the solid ground. Leaning her head to one side, Sadie's eyes slid to her companions. Mute words left Abigail's mouth, and Charles's hand wandered from left to right, swiftly writing down every word and perpetuating it on rough paper. His eyes darted from time to time up to Abigail's, who followed his hand curiously.

How Sadie would have liked to write this text for her. It was not much, let alone a big job, but Sadie would have felt good about it. She would have listened to Abigail's words as they fell sonorous over her lips, captivating Sadie. Her eyes would have deviated again and again from the charcoal pencil, only to dive into Abigail's shiny iris. A soft smile would have settled on Sadie's mouth, entranced by Abigail's nature, and Sadie would have had to hurry to write down every word before she even lost herself in thought. Maybe Abigail might have noticed, maybe not, and gave Sadie an amused irritated look before Abigail slapped her on the back and told Sadie to listen when someone's talking to her.

Smirking, Sadie was greeted by Arthur, who pulled her out of her thoughts, his head appeared behind her shoulder, and his warm breath, which he blew snorting from his nostrils, stroked Sadie's cheeks. His muzzle was warm under her hand and he was willing to get petted. But Bob was standing nearby as well, Sadie bridging the distance and grimacing at his big saucer eyes. Sadie's Bob, whom she had paid too little attention to in recent days.

"Hey you," she said, "long time, ain't it? But it seems Abigail and you are tuned to the same wavelength. Quite apart from our Arthur here." Sadie glanced at the other horse, who looked back innocently and winked at her dearly. "You're doing fine, my boy,” she praised Bob, who wanted to nibble on her belt. Sadie pushed his muzzle aside and laughed. "I still need that though." Bob showed his teeth as if he wanted to make a grimace and shrugged his ears. "You belong in the circus," she laughed, stroking his nose one last time and realized that Charles and Abigail had to be ready.

In the distance, Sadie heard the train, which would have to pass the rails at any moment and continue east over the bridges. Blue birds flitting through the branches of the trees nearby and fluttered twittering over her head.

Sadie nudged her hat and wiped her forehead with the backhand. It was a beautiful day, the sun was shining and the temperatures in this territory were moderate to good, at least during the day and when the sun was out. With wet hands Sadie opened her jacket and a pleasant breeze welcomed her body. Due to the unexpected breeze, a pleasant shower overran her body.

Her shirt was a disaster. Once white, then dyed from the fresh blood that had flowed in quantities through the small bullet wound and now, long since dried, only a kind of brown, which gave the fabric a new coat of paint. In between, a small hole where the bullet had penetrated and the individual fibers would fringe, if the dried blood would not have stiffened. Sadie clicked her tongue and kept in mind, to put on the new shirt later. 

Before Sadie went back to Charles and Abigail, she stowed her jacket with the horses. After that Sadie walked with small steps, almost cautiously, towards the two, hands clasped behind their backs. As her eyes widened from the lush lawn, she was greeted by two pairs of eyes.

An unwanted smile jumped on Sadie's face and rounded her spotted cheeks. Abigail's eyes rested on her for a moment, a second longer than Sadie had expected, and Sadie could have sworn to have seen a sparkle in Abigail's eyes as her left eyebrow twitched briefly. But ever Abigail avoided eye contact and let Sadie in the uncertain. Then Sadie met Charles, who looked at her questioningly and smiled back friendly, while he pulled a loose strand from his face.

"Do you have it?" Sadie asked in the old fashioned way.

"Successfully done," Charles said, handing Abigail the sheet of paper along with the envelope.

Of course, he knew he could have wrapped it just as well, without that it would have made a difference, but Sadie knew that he, although Abigail could not read, still wanted to give the chance to take a look at it. And she did just that. Her blue eyes flew over the paper and Sadie could only tell by her bouncing pupils how long the text was. 

Then Abigail looked up and glanced quickly between Charles and Sadie, as if they'd caught her in something. Abigail grimaced, the lines between her eyebrows shaded, and Sadie struggled to avert her gaze from Abigail. Abigail's tongue trailed over her lovely lips as she folded the letter and put it in the envelope. Then Abigail let out a soft hawk.

"I'll go over to the post office for a minute," she announced, stepping deliberately toward the station, her arms bobbing tactfully beside her body.

When Sadie's eyes met Charles, she was the one who felt caught. But why? Thoughtful and yet knowing his eyes lingered on hers. Sadie swallowed. What was wrong with the people around her? Or was it her and her secret thoughts? She expected him to ask a question at any moment, a question that Sadie could not have answered. To Sadie's surprise, however, Charles's face loosened and replaced his harsh Indian features with soft, self-confessed ones, with a smile that reached to his eyes, revealing wrinkles.

Turning away, Sadie shoveled her boots between the blades of grass and ripped the ground under her feet.

"Are not you curious?" She heard Charles voice.

Sadie's head straightened up slowly, the moment she used to think, and met his eyes, he nodded to her requesting, the eyebrows flickered short and a crooked smile stretched his lip.

"I am and remain modest, Mr. Smith," Sadie replied, leaving him wondering. But she knew that he now suspect more.

"You have not changed a piece, have you?" He joked.

At least that's what Sadie believed. Because she herself had not missed it, as much as Sadie wanted to push it away.

"You have to find out for yourself."

Charles then winked at her and Sadie could not help laughing.

Before she could reply to that, like a playful threat, Abigail appeared, accompanied by her rustling footsteps across the lawn.

"Well, I hope the correspondence is not hindered by any semi-strong robber gangs. I can't wait to receive an answer." Abigail's face warmed and she seemed to be far away, in a better place.

That was not hard, Sadie thought, and almost a loud sigh escaped her lips, it's better everywhere than here. With me. At the thought, Sadie pressed her lips together, only one line was visible.

She wrinkled her nose and let go of the brooding. Because it brought her just as little as to shoot around with her revolver on the street for no reason. Except an empty drum. That was the point. Sadie wanted to save her thoughts for the time being, before throwing things upside down in Abigail's frustrated way and aggravating the situation when she was about to recover.

Already, Sadie felt the forces pulling on her. That was enough. But what was their next clue? The letter was written and would soon start the journey. Sadie reminded herself to ask where, let alone think about it. What mattered was to bridge the time. Find out the fate of John, a possibility. Find Tilly, for Abigail, and disappear without her. Just as Abigail would want it. At least Abigail would be safe there, not like out there.

"What's next?" Sadie wanted to know, her voice rougher than usual.

"Let's see …," Charles started and put on a thoughtful face. "Staying with Owanjila Damm would not have helped us much, except for many looks. We're not interested in that." He paused and looked at the faces of the women, whether they agreed or someone objected. "When John shows up there, he will find a way to contact us. You told me about Tilly and Jack, but I'm afraid it's still too early to turn up there. The Pinkertons are clever, not as much as we are, but they have a whole army on their backs. When it comes down to it, we're outnumbered and not as strong as we were back then." Charles narrowed his eyes and fixed one point behind Sadie. "I would suggest, as we had previously planned, to travel further inland and make sure to shake off the Pinkertons once and for all. Maybe we can find someone who talks and can tell us more about John." 

In Sadie's words, wandering around aimlessly.

But Charles had a point. The danger that the Pinkertons were still after them, and that was most likely, they could not show up at Tilly. They would endanger everyone and especially Jack. Furthermore, Sadie was glad that she had more time with Abigail and thus had the opportunity to clear everything between them. What she noticed, however, was that the more she heard John's name, the more solid was the thought that he might be dead.

She could not explain it to herself, but it seemed like fiction from a trash novel if John appeared and stood in front of them alive. Her feeling could tell Sadie that fate had nothing good for him this time. Contrary to her previous statements to Abigail. But Sadie had never lied, John was a tough dog, yes, just as he was a lucky guy in the most unlikely situations. But sometime everyone got caught and Sadie lost with the hours, her faith in a safe return and a happy family reunion.

But with all that shit happening around them, Sadie just wanted to know one thing. And that was Abigail safe, with her son. It was no coincidence that Charles had joined them. He was the necessary calm that Sadie needed. A smart, prudent man with a lot of heart. This allowed Sadie to take a deep breath, take a break and process the events. If necessary, Charles would be the one to keep an eye on Abigail and Sadie trusted him with every fiber of her body. Arthur had done it too.

Frost overcame Sadie and she rubbed her arms. The sun was still up in the sky, now it had to be afternoon, and smiled down on her. Her stomach, however, was empty again and she pushed the cold draft on the lack of food.

"While we're here, let's eat something to tackle the journey strengthened. After that, I'm ready for everything. I suggest we set up a fire between the trees over there. "Sadie pointed to a nearby spot where they would be far from view and looked around.

Charles and Abigail shared a look and nodded to each other.

"Agreed," Charles replied.

So they followed suit.

While they were warming up some of the meat Charles had previously bought from the butcher to have something decent in the stomach, Sadie poked around in the fire with a stick. On the horizon, the sun crept down and gave the earth's side its last rays of sunshine.

The crackling of the fire settled over Sadie's ears. The talks were limited. Since she and Abigail had nothing left to say to each other, it had been strangely quiet for Sadie. Even with Charles. Sadie had not been so withdrawn in a long time as she was at that time.

The conversations in the cold, surrounded by huge mountains and the tranquility they radiated, seemed far away. It was barely two days that had passed. But even in the situation she had been in, Sadie felt a balanced exuberance. Even if the house that once was hers was no twenty yards away in sunken debris on the floor. Even if the Pinkertons were hot on their heels and Sadie did not know at the time if they would come over the mountain at any moment and pick them up. After the first night, Sadie had felt a strange sense of security in this place. Ironically, if it was the place that had triggered the opposite in her not so long ago. And would have. Sadie began to believe that Abigail had saved her life more often than she suspected.

She dropped her eyes from the flames and her eyes moved involuntarily to Abigail. Soft light shaded Abigail's face, prancing surreptitiously over her cheeks, giving her expressionless face a melancholy air. Maybe only Sadie could see that. Sadie looked up as she saw a movement.

"Sadie, your meat." Charles waved his hand around to grab her attention.

Almost lazily, Sadie's eyes peeled away from Abigail, her head ahead of her before the pupils followed the new target. Just then, Sadie had caught a glimpse of Abigail looking at Sadie to see what was wrong with her.

"My meat?" Slowly it dawned on her. "Oh, shit, my meat!" Sadie pulled her food out of the fire and inspected it with scrutiny. When Sadie raised her eyes, Charles looked at her and waited patiently for her findings. "At least still edible," she announced, whereupon Charles smiled.

Sadie followed his eyes, which lingered briefly on Abigail and met her expressionless face. Not a second later, Abigail turned away, glanced at Charles and rested her pupils on the fire. By now, Sadie should have gotten used to her coldness, but it was anything but that. Sadie was expecting a soft smile, unfathomable, which wanted to show at every time they saw each other in the eye. Instead, her otherwise warm eyes were replaced by cold. But .. was that really all behind Abigail's façade?

"Thanks, for the meal, Charles," Abigail's voice chimed, while getting up and tapping her skirt.

"What's mine is yours." Charles said between a bite and made a waving motion. "One more moment," he added when Abigail got ready to leave, and shoved the last bite into his mouth. Sadie felt strengthened and found it a good decision to have the time to eat. Charles gave her exactly the same impression.

"Right back." 

As it was getting dark and dawn broke to announce the end of another day, Sadie vanished briefly among the trees and wild hedges to put on the new shirt. The old one she dropped randomly to the ground on the spot and went straight back to the camp. Should the one who found it, think what he wants and come up with a corresponding story.

Already now Sadie heard the crickets that accompanied her footsteps and the sun, which was only halfway up and colored the sky in a dark orange, the clouds ran from the bright into the dark and rounded off the picture. It almost seemed gray if the sun itself did not dive the dark shadows on the horizon into orange.

While Sadie let the picture sink in, she stood at Arthur's saddle, adjusting her hat and sighing softly. Then she let her eyes glide over the meadow one last time, up into the sky before Sadie swung herself onto the saddle and looked to the east. 

There, too, were lights, like a semicircle in the distance, baptizing the darkness in a warm veil. Sadie's head turned to the setting sun, then east again. What was going on there? It was across the Dakota River, on top of the cliff. She could not see exactly, it was too far away, but there seemed to be something going on. Why else so many lights that grew together into a large dome?

"Hey, you see that?" Sadie pointed in the direction where she had seen the lights. Charles put his hand over his eyes and looked into the distance.

"We should better avoid the place, we do not know who or what is going on." He went to look up Sadie's eyes, just so Sadie could recognize this in the coming darkness.

Unsure she puckered her lips, because Sadie did not like the idea of satisfying her curiosity. In addition, they wanted to cross the Dakota River anyway. It would not be a detour. But for now Sadie kept that to herself and remained silent.

The three of them set their horses in motion, took the slope down to the river and looked for a suitable place, which remained largely flat and rode through the cold water. Sadie could feel the current up in the saddle and Arthur had something to fight, but they could make it across the river unscathed. Only Sadie's feet were wet again and the memories of the white mountains and the fluffy snow shot into her head. But the powdered mountains lay behind them and the interior land before them. Only the memories Sadie had taken with her and the incident with Abigail, which did not want to let go of her. That had been the beginning, Sadie had turned everything in the wrong direction. And that's because she played her anger on Abigail. Clever girl.

Indefinable noises penetrated Sadie's ears. She raised her head tensely, her eyebrows drawn into a line and her eyes narrowed. Sadie focused on the distant background noise, blinding the hoofbeats on the dusty ground. Shortly after they had crossed the river, Sadie swerved to the right, so that they were almost at the height of the bridge. 

She steered Arthur across the meadow, where a narrow passage in the rock led to the cliff. Shortly before that, Sadie had been able to make out what sounds her ear had penetrated. The sound of laughter echoed through the darkness and various voices mingled with each other, male as well as female, all underlaid with music that made one dance. Happy sounds, which should help the pack to a good mood.

Sadie did not know what it was or why she decided to do it when Sadie was the one who insisted on safety when Abigail was around her. That had not changed. Maybe it was due to Charles's presence, maybe missing events that made her blood boil. Or it was coincidence, like fate. All that did not matter in the end, because what mattered was that Sadie decided to give Arthur the heels and climb the hill through the uplifted, self-proclaimed path.

Behind her, Sadie heard the cut-off calls of her companions, and she could swear she heard Abigail's voice call her name. Even that did not stop Sadie from getting off her horse the next moment, tying his reins around the tree that was in front of her, and looking closely at the scenery in front of her, her hands on her belt.

In the meantime, barely more than a quarter of the sun could be seen, the sky showed a changing purple and would soon yield only a dark blue. In front of Sadie there was a crowd of people scattered across the field, carriages built in the lights of the lanterns, many tables and chairs, there could also be boxes, people everywhere. Some people. No familiar faces, but Sadie threw it back in time as they all had their camp with Dutch and celebrated gaily, on a glorious day. So that's it, a big celebration. Sadie had not experienced this for a long time. Did she want to stay?

Sadie heard a dull sound behind her, she did not have to turn around to know that it was Charles who had just jumped out of his saddle. Nevertheless, she turned her head, nodded to the action and smiled determined.

"Check it out," Sadie said. "When was the last time we celebrated so much?" Her eyes darted excitedly over the crowd.

"We shouldn't be here." Abigail spoke up as she approached Charles, a worried expression on her face that not least contained the crease between her eyebrows.

"You're right, Abigail. We should not," Charles replied. "And Sadie ..." His gaze shifted from Sadie to Abigail, who looked back patiently, he seemed unsure. "I remember Shady Belle." Charles did not express himself more.

But it was enough for Sadie to know that he meant the day Jack could be brought back home from Bronte. Out of the corner of his eye, Sadie saw Abigail roll her shoulders as if to shake the tension out of her body, but Sadie's face was turned to Charles.

"Then we clearly have something to catch up on." Before one of the two could contribute to their plans, Sadie got going and headed straight for the crowd.

The turf under her boots had long ago flattened and lay down on the floor, with the multitude of people and what they carried with them, Sadie did not wonder.

Calmly Sadie settled among the guests and did not show. There were so many different faces, from sharp to soft cut, that they would hardly attract anyone's attention at the gathering. Sadie would be surprised if everyone knew each other there. Her eyes darted over the people and the exuberant mood. Not least Sadie noticed the liquor bottles and beer mugs. Thinking she bit the inside of her cheeks. No sooner was the thought loose, she came over a cold shower, even though she was warm. Without further thought, Sadie aimed a bunch of people around a table, paying close attention to the faces of the guests to satisfy the lurking paranoia of potential enemies.

Three men and two women were standing there at the table. Barely a step away, Sadie eyed the stall and her eyes lit up. Sadie grabbed a beer from the generous box as if it were the most normal thing in the world and knocked the cap off the corner of the table. That earned her a glimpse of one of the men who studied it thoroughly. Then Sadie raised her beer, took a sip, and went to the fire to play it safe.

Her eyes danced over the heads, like the shadows of the flames on her face, searching for Charles and Abigail. But they were not where Sadie had left them. Only the outlines of the horses could be seen. Sadie waved her head in all directions, but there were too many people and she could not locate her companions. After a while, Sadie sat down on a nearby box and disappeared into her thoughts, occasionally sipping beer.

First, Sadie wondered where Charles and Abigail were going to hang around and resent her for turning away from them. No vote, pure selfishness. That was certainly positive again. An ironic smile crossed her lips. But what did that change? After all, she was already in this position. And Charles was the last one to give Sadie a lecture. Although she would like to see this page on him. The ironic smile gave way to a real one. That would be very amusing. Abigail, on the other hand ... She knew how to make an announcement and it would sit like a slap. Sadie took a long sip from the bottle, which remained bitter in the mouth. And how.

But all these were not the reasons that had driven her there, probably against all reason.

As Sadie lingered on her crate, the fire lit up her face and kept her warm from two yards away. Her elbows resting on her knees and the bottle clasped in her hands between her legs, her head raised, but the hat was deep and she found, despite the great sounds of the music, no great pleasure in all this.

Sadie jerked up, one hand on her shoulder, and her thoughts were sucked up by a black hole until there was nothing left but a sheer horror. Her head turned to one side and Charles's friendly face looked at her with apologetic eyes.

"I did not mean to scare you," he said nudging Sadie to make way for him.

She did that, and soon afterwards Charles sat next to her. His eyes were on Sadie's face, he studied her features thoroughly.

"You didn't scare me. I just wanted to change seats, it was an inconvenient moment." Sadie looked at him, his face barely three inches from hers.

He held her gaze, a strand of hair in front of his left eye, grimaced and then smiled.

"I would have thought so.", Charles replied and stroked the strand behind his ear.

Sadie wiggled her eyebrows and allowed herself to be infected by his smile. She noticed his facial features fall and slowly give way to seriousness and suddenly Sadie felt caught again.

Before he could speak, Sadie pulled out her box and offered Charles a cigarette to come back to her project a few hours ago, looking at him solicitously. He studied Sadie for a few seconds.

"Alright," Charles finally said, taking two cigarettes from the pack and handing Sadie one.

Then he pulled out his matches, igniting it on his sturdy boots, and held the flame under Sadie's cigarette, who puffed on the stink until it glowed before he made his own glow. Sadie pulled hard and let the smoke glide through her lungs with relish. As she blew out, she watched as the smoke became one with Charles' and slid invisibly over their heads in the next second.

"What's wrong with you and Abigail?" He asked suddenly, his voice soft and gentle.

Of course he had not missed it. Sadie should have counted on that. Her fingers fumbled at the beer bottle, she quarreled with herself. To save time, Sadie slowly brought the bottle to her lips and took a long sip. She grimaced and wiped her sleeve on it. Her eyebrows twitched thoughtfully. Could she tell Charles? But who, if not him? Charles was the most understanding person she knew. His own life had taught him. Sadie struggled to be open about words. At least if they came from deep inside. The people around them chatted and laughed, the music kept pouring in, and yet it seemed to Sadie as if none of her words could be overheard and anyone could listen to them. These words, however, were intended only for Charles ears.

"I pushed her from me because ... because I'm afraid of losing her." Sadie said it out loud the first time and gave it to herself, softly these heavy words left her lips and weighed tons on her tongue.

At the same time she felt an enormous relief, even something like shame. Ashamed of herself. That she had taken so long to admit it to herself and hit Abigail in the head. When the words left her mouth, it was finally sealed for Sadie, and she was slowly creeping into the realization of why her feelings might deceive her in this way.

Silence fell over the two. Charles looked into the crowd and took a drag on the cigarette. Sadie did the same. Seconds passed, if not minutes, when they sat quietly next to each other and smoked. Then Charles took one last strong draft, dropped the cigarette to the ground and buried it under his boot.

Now Charles turned his body to Sadie, their knees touching, his face in front of hers, his eyes unfathomable.

"Bonds are precious, far more precious than any of us may suspect. We should not destroy them ourselves, crush them to dust, because something does not suit us, or let us be led too fast by our own feelings. They're too valuable for that. "His big hand squeezed Sadie's shoulder. "Look at her."

Then Sadie looked over her shoulders, suddenly aware that they were only two. Charles noticed that.

"She's sitting over there." He nudged his chin straight.

Sadie's pupils followed his line, across the wriggling flames and through the meandering smoke that made its way into the night air. And then Sadie's eyes met Abigail's. As if frozen, they looked at each other, neither of them moved or dared to avert their eyes. Then it was Sadie who gave in. Although that was what she had been wishing for all along. That Abigail's beautiful eyes withstood her and did not flee directly because she could not bear to look Sadie in the eye.

"I know, Charles. I know." Sadie sighed and looked down in dismay.

"Look again, Sadie."

Was that a laugh in his voice? But Sadie did just that. What did he mean? Abigail, who looked over and over again, got caught, and acted like nothing? Abigail who- Sadie smiled. Only now did it strike Sadie.

"Maybe she wants to dance?" Charles suggested, his eyes fixed on Sadie all the time.

"I'll be right back," Sadie said, taking the last sip of her beer, removing the hat from her head, which she placed on the now free seat next to Charles and patted grateful his strong shoulder.

She wrapped herself around the blazing fire, her eyes fixed on Abigail, concentrating not to pinch or shame on the ground. No, Sadie was steadfast, confident and knew exactly what she wanted.

She wrapped the blazing fire, her eyes fixed on Abigail and focused not to pinch or to look ashamed to the ground. No, Sadie was steadfast, confident and knew exactly what she wanted.

"Miss Roberts." Sadie held out her hand to Abigail.

Big doe eyes looked up at her and shone even in the shadow that Sadie threw on her. It was cold on her back as the thought turned up that Abigail would dismiss her at any moment. Sadie's hair heaved and her eyes blinked for a moment at her free arms, where the shirt was carded, back in Abigail's blue eyes. As Abigail did the same, she felt caught again and Sadie's hand was still reaching out to her, the realization chasing an opposite rush of heat across her body. Before Sadie could think, Abigail's hand crept up, her eyes never leaving Sadie's, and then her warm hand lay in Sadie's. Hesitating to give Abigail the chance to escape, she embraced it. A smile crept on Sadie's face.

"I thought you would leave me stranded."

"I almost have that."

"But?"

"I haven't danced for a long time."


	10. Ring Them Bells

Light footsteps glided across the lawn, the moon was in the distance, shining for that special moment. No cloud dared to cross its path and take the light from it. No one seemed to notice, only Sadie could see and feel it. She did not care, because she did not notice the others around her either. The loud laughter, the excited voices of the guests. None of it reached her ears. Only the music enveloped her and Abigail. Sadies right hand rested on her waist just where Abigails belt was, and the left one held Abigails right hand, stretched out slightly at shoulder level. Through the fabric, Sadie felt Abigails warm hand on her shoulder, and a gentle smile crept up on her lips. Who would have thought that the two would ever dance together and in such a place, under these circumstances?

Sadie struggled to keep Abigail's eyes and had the hard feeling of having to say something. If not, she wanted to destroy the moment. But now Sadie felt strong enough to tell Abigail as well, looking into her deep blue eyes that did not want to reveal anything and looked unfathomably at hers.

"Abigail", Sadie let the name melt on her tongue, she had not pronounced it for long, her words were quiet and intended only for Abigail's ears, and took the moment to take a breath, "I was never mad at you or John." There was something on Abigail's face, but Sadie spoke quickly. "I camouflaged my fear as anger. Something I can handle better. It has never been my intention to hurt or blame you. The moment I pointed the revolver at you …" Sadie paused. "I couldn't bear losing you. I'm sorry." For a long time, those were the most sincere words that had left Sadie's mouth. She was surprised at how easy these meaningful words were on her lips.

"You do not have to explain yourself."

"I wanted it." Something in Abigail seemed to be fighting.

"Thank you, Sadie. Really. I know how hard that has to be for you." Sadie started to grin and shook her head. "I missed your stupid grin." Abigail pounded her shoulder lightly.

"And I missed your punches," teased Sadie. "But you would be surprised how easy it was for me." Sadie initiated a twist that Abigail smoothly performed before their eyes met again.

"Shouldn't that make me think?" Abigail asked, brows raised and a challenging glow in her eyes.

"I was sincere to you and I do not intend to change that in the near future." Sadie made sure there was a certain sincerity in her voice.

"I'm just kidding, Sadie."

"I know," she said, but it had been important to her to make that clear.

"But what exactly do you mean, not in the near future?" Abigail asked skeptically.

"Oh, Abigail, you'll have to find out for yourself," Sadie mused, wiggling her eyebrows.

"Shut up, Sadie," she answered, laughing.

"You asked, Abigail." Sadie put the emphasis on Abigail's name.

"I know," Abigail sighed, leaning her forehead against Sadies forehead.

Sadie hadn't thought before that she could exchange such intense glances with someone again. Endless blue, playing with a hint of gray, as dark as a storm, whirling around the stinging black of her dilated pupils. Long eyelashes edged Abigail's eyes and honestly blinked at Sadie. Sadie became too conscious of the throb of her heart as she continued to lose herself in Abigails eyes. She opened her lips a crack, as if she wanted to say something, but Sadies mouth gave only hot breath, which evaporated into the fresh night air. 

Still they moved slowly to the music. Sadie had completely blanked out the environment, and she couldn't even tell if the music was still running or a consolidation of her mind. Was it her heart or was the drumming of the instruments? She swallowed hard as her eyes slid to Abigails lips for a nanosecond. But even in her rigid, Sadie moved on, small sweet steps followed by Abigail. And before Sadie could act, out of her mind and lost in the moment, the reality tore her out of her dream. Suddenly something crashed behind her and Sadies head shot up to make out the noise.

While she was looking for the trigger, everything was already up and down, loud clinking and roar broke from the crowd. It was a huge mess, people were running around, Sadie could swear that someone flew past them and had fallen a hairs breadth into the open flames. Shortly thereafter, there was a loud bang and the fire hit all sides. Sadie heard panicked screams and saw the man lying on the ground frantically shaking the jacket from his body that had caught fire. She opened her eyes and grabbed Abigail by the wrist. Her eyes continued to search until they met a few running people.

"Take care of yourself." Sadies eyes ran over Abigails face before she jerked around and steered for the ruckus. As she approached, Sadie heard a rumbling voice stick out, deep and angry.

"You steal all our wages! Race mix, that I don't laugh!" He rumbled. "'A black redskin, your mother was probably a whore," the voice snapped, laughing, and Sadie was sure his tie must have been too tight for him. 

Meanwhile, Sadie had made her way through the crowd and could make out a stocky guy, who was just rolling angrily, ready to strike. Then there was Charles. He scrambled to his feet, he had to be hurled into the dirt by the man in front of him without premonition.

"You ain't wanna mess with me, big one." Charles threatened, jumping in his spot a few times and getting ready for something bigger.

The big one laughed loudly and played on his mustache. Some men who had lined up behind him joined in.

The events had calmed down a bit, the chaos subsided. Most of them were on the edge and in safe surroundings, both men and women. Others grabbed a chance to beat each other, with another bottle speeding past Sadie, her head following the flying object over her shoulder, which burst at a nearby box.

Sadie wanted to keep an eye on Charles and the Mustache, but no sooner had she turned her head back than she was carelessly jostled. Annoyed, Sadie turned to face two fighting men, who were jockeying.

"Watch where you step," she snapped, taking a swing with her boot, punching the two in the middle of the knot they formed, causing them to plummet to the ground and payed no further attention to them. Should they take care of their problem.

As soon as Sadie looked around, she found Charles in a circle of men. Mustache and Charles beat each other, the cheering cries of the men drowning out the clapping blows of the fighters.

Something in Sadie flared up, she wanted to do something, just not watch. But the solid mass of men didn't let her pass. As she propped herself on a man's narrow shoulder to push him aside, in vain, Sadie could look over him and see Charles hit him with a fist that had been sitting. The crowd cheered as the big one stumbled backwards, his paw held close to his mouth. He wiped his bloody lip aggressively, spitting blood on the green lawn. His eyes showed nothing but madness and resentment.

Sadie bit back a laugh, the guy was hurt in his dignity, it smelled ten miles against the wind. A 'black redskin' put him in the barriers.

"Charles, you have him!", she called and jumped up. Charles's head turned to find Sadie. Sadie opened her eyes. "Watch out!" She yelled. But it was too late. The guy had used the moment of his carelessness, which made Sadie grunt, because fair fighting was different, and gave him a hook to the chin that almost knocked Charles down if he hadn't caught himself. "Ouch." Guilty, Sadie grimaced.

"That's your end!" At once the big one wanted to beat Charles, who skillfully dodged his sluggish fist, slipped through his arm and thumped his elbow into his ribs. He leaned forward and Charles grabbed his head with both hands before slamming his knee with violence in his face, making him acquainted with the distorted cracking of his nose, which itself reached Sadies ears and silenced the crowd. Then he fell to the ground, collapsed. The big flap he had was pressed into a narrow line and only the moaning from his throat could be heard.

The silence stretched for seconds, until suddenly the crowd yelped and slapped their arms in the air, and Sadie agreed with a laugh. Feeling a grip on her belt, Sadie turned her head until she was on par with Abigail. How long could she have been there? The two smiled at each other, and Abigail got infected by Sadie and gave a pleased victory cry.

Suddenly it was like a dejavu and a loud bang echoed over their heads. The two women startled, Sadie saw the whole crowd jumping in horror, shoulders hunched, and then another one started. Screams, loud and piercing, tramps and fleeing people. Ascending smoke, Sadie caught it with her eyes. A raised colt. She pushed Abigail behind her and searched for Charles, flipping her hand to the holster and pulling out her revolver. Before Sadie knew what was happening, another barking shot pierced the scene.

Restless, she tried to locate Charles, Sadies pulse drummed rhythmically in her chest, down to her throat. Abruptly she was seized by a feeling of weakness and beads of sweat formed on Sadies forehead, which were caught by the balmy wind and made her shiver against the heat.

"Charles ?!" Sadie's eyes ran across the field, below which she encountered Abigail's worried features, who looked just as aroused as Sadie herself.

"There!", Abigail said and the next moment Sadie felt a hand on her shoulder. It wasn't Abigail, as she had first suspected, for that the hand covered too much area on her narrow shoulder. Relieved, Sadie let out a breath as Charles's face appeared in front of her. Loose hair fell over his eyes and made him look agitated. His hasty head movements underlined the picture.

"Come on, we need to get out of here." As Charles spoke, he pushed the two women toward where the horses stood, and without hesitation, Sadie and Abigail did as they were told.

Sadies footsteps felt heavy, as if the earth's gravity was more than usual for her. Even her breath dwindled faster, with limp, shaky arms Sadie pulled herself on the saddle horn on the back of the horse, while she was breathing heavily and her lungs gave a whistle from it. But Sadie made no comment to her companions. Her heart throbbed in her ears and her face felt unusually hot. Sadie wiped her wet forehead, grabbed the reins stiffly and rode up. The three took the steep slope from which they had come.

Charles took the lead, closely followed by Abigail and Sadie. Above them, the bridge jutted to a new one, it was the way they must have taken one or two hours ago. Dim, the scene blurred in front of Sadie's eyes and she had to blink hard before she could recognize something again. Tense, Sadie tried to focus on her body, the constant throbbing of her heart that slowly diminished, and not quiet as rabid as before, hit her breast, the slight dizziness that Sadie wanted to overcome and the loss of her spatial perception. But her pulse stayed high and her breath did not really calm down. Once again, Sadie wiped her wet forehead weakly, leaving a cold sweat on the back of her hand.

Sadie could not say how long that lasted, let alone how long she was sitting in the saddle and struggling. Roaring sat on her ears and seemed to want to crush her head with iron hands. Like a jamming signal paired with a tunnel vision at her eyes, she wrestled with herself. Sadie fell limp in the saddle, the up and down galloping seemed nothing but tiring at her. With all her strength, Sadie tried to keep her eyes open and straighten up, in which her wet hands slid off and hang off to the side. Her head rested on Arthur's powerful neck and black mane. She strengthen her grip on the reins, at least that was the plan. Instead, she tore him to the left, startled Arthur's head jerked to the named direction, while Sadies eyes exhausted fell shut and her body was no longer under her control. A muffled sound made it to Sadies ears, followed by a neighing. It seemed so far away. This was followed by another rumble that Sadie could not interpret in her condition.

"Sadie!", It echoed through her head, as recurrent sound waves that did not want to break, solidified, with the image of Abigails blue eyes in her mind.

White black lights flickered in her mind's eye and replaced the picture. Then there was nothing but impenetrable blackness.


	11. Pandemonium

Sadie found it hard to open her eyes, so she let them closed. Stinging heat was over her body, her chest was heavy with breathing and her head jerked uncontrollably in all directions. Her lips felt brittle, as if she hadn't drunk for days.

A blank fear took possession of her and did not let go of Sadie. Hot blood ran through her veins, as if they were about to burn up or burst, spurred on by her violent pulse. And everything Sadie could do was endure.

There was a slight pressure on her forehead that had just been taken. Shortly after it was back and a cool wetness spread. Hot air streamed between Sadie's lips, relieved. That was good. She felt soft fingertips brush against her cheeks and then one hand covered them. So warm and soft. Then it was the thumb that soothed her hot cheek. Not a second later, Sadie lost consciousness.

\--

Trembling, Sadie's eyelids opened. The sky was gray, but no less glaring in Sadie's light-sensitive eyes. Immediately she pinched these and tried to recognize something through the narrowed eyes. Sucked out, Sadie sighed over her rough lips. Her heartbeat had calmed down to a normal pace, she realized with relief. A slight dizziness came over Sadie as she wanted to raise her head, so she sank again. Tense she looked into the sky, which was covered by a thick cloud layer. She couldn't say what time of day it was. All she saw was the sky and treetops that lay around her. Where was she? With a little more effort than the first time, Sadie leaned on her arms and faintly moved to a sitting position. A burn came from her stomach.

"No, don't, Sadie. You need to rest." Sadie turned her head and came to eye level with Abigail, who was already squeezing her shoulders, onto the blanket below her. A weary smile courted Sadie's mouth. "Drink this," she said, bringing a cup to Sadie's lips.

"And what about you?" Sadie asked, who hadn't missed Abigail's deep edges around her eyes, before she enclosed the cup, raised her head and took a long sip. Bitter, it ran down Sadie's throat and she grimaced in disgust before she spat in the grass next to her. "What the hell is that?"

"Do not worry, I'm fine." Abigail said and the suppressed yawning on her face made her look unbelievable. "Charles mixed it. That should strengthen you, "she added.

"I'm supposed to buy that?" Sadie asked with a raised eyebrow, ignoring the latter. Abigail's eyes fixed on Sadie's, and as she looked intently at Sadie, Abigail nodded lazily, trying to hide her tired eyes by opening them wider. A hoarse laugh escaped Sadie. "Come on, Abigail, I can see it."

"No, I just slept a little bit earlier. Really, don't worry. Sleep on. I'll keep watch." Then Sadie realized that she hadn't heard Charles yet, had it been seen. Her eyes scanned the clearing.

"Where's Charles?" Wonderment played in Sadie's voice, her eyebrows twitching in confusion.

"He's left." Before Sadie could jump up again, Abigail grabbed her shoulder firmly and squeezed Sadie down. Sadie was surprised how well Abigail knew her and without consciously controlling it, Sadie gave her a challenging look. "Charles insisted. But he didn't leave without making sure that you would feel better soon." Abigail added, her eyes searching in Sadies. When she was sure that Sadie would not move, Abigail took her hands from Sadie and put them on her knees. Sadie's eyes followed her movements.

"What a great guy," Sadie said a little sarcastically. Sadie did not like the fact that Charles had left her alone. She disliked leaving Abigail alone. "Did he tell you what he's up to?"

"He said he needed to go back to the Indians and make sure to lay a false trail. The men two days ago- "

"Two days ago?" Startled, Sadie looked at the woman in front of her.

"The fever got you bad," Abigail said, her hands folded in her lap. "The men, two of them have followed us." Sadie listened intently, her face draining all color, if that was still possible, as she listened to Abigail's words. "Couldn't handle a defeat of their friend. There was a small dispute. Then Charles decided it would be best if he moved on."

"I know exactly what a "small dispute" means, Abigail! What happened?" Sadie couldn't control the agitation in her voice. Abigail said nothing, pulling the revolver from the belt tied around her waist. She inspected the gun and weighed it in her hand before handing it to Sadie.

"I think you should have it back," Abigail said, head bowed. Sadie's eyes slid from Abigail to the revolver and back. It did not take words to understand that. Slowly Sadie put her fingers around the Colt, the wooden handle was still warm where it had touched Abigail's body, and her brown eyes read from Abigail's blue, which looked back unfathomably. Swallowing, she pulled the iron out of Abigail's hand without taking her eyes off her.

"I'm sorry," Sadie whispered knowingly. Abigail shook her head.

"It doesn't have to. I decided to do that," she replied firmly. Her eyes reflected the truthfulness of her words. Sadie nodded approvingly. Abigail's ribcage rose and Sadie watched as a deep breath escaped her lungs.

"You should sleep," Sadie said, who looked once more into the tired eyes of Abigail and examined her sluggish smile.

"We could argue about that."

"If you want, darling. Let me just remind you that my arguments are quick-witted and inescapable." A smug expression appeared on Sadie's face. Abigail, on the other hand, looked at Sadie, perplexed.

"Darling?" Sadie bit her lip, she hadn't expected that Abigail would give it attention. That she had even said it out loud! It had to be the fever, Sadie was sure.

"Go to sleep Abigail, you already hear things.", Sadie answered witty and confident of victory.

"Maybe you're right." Abigail touched her head, Sadie barely trusting her ears. It actually worked! She stifled a sly grin. "But..."

"No buts. I stay awake, I slept enough. Two days." Sadie looked at Abigail with a meaningful look. "Just lie down before you fall over." Surreptitiously, Sadie looked at Abigail's blanket. She noticed that this place seemed incredibly familiar to her.

Trees around them, a small clearing. A cliff and big stones. These stones Sadie would recognize everywhere. Sadie's pupils widened, fixing the stone. At that time, a few months ago, suddenly it seemed like yesterday, she was sitting on exactly this chunk. Her whole existence was filled with pain. Horseshoe Overlook. There, where her new life was to begin, in a gang of outlaws and a woman whom Sadie couldn't get out of her mind. Was she surprised that she had once again come to this place? Sadie could not answer it herself. This place had offered the gang the perfect hideaway for weeks. Then it got too hot.

Would one once again come to them there on the ropes? Sadie could imagine that they were safe for the time being. For now. Besides, Abigail had mentioned that it was already two days ago. Soon they should disappear, Sadie decided. A long stay could be dangerous, even with a wrong track as a hedge. But Sadie also wanted to avoid unfavorably crossing paths with the pursuers. Since then even a wrong track would bring nothing more.

Sadie squinted, headache taken the upper hand and a wave of tiredness overcame her. Not that she let anything show if she hadn't hastily closed her eyes.

"You alright?" Abigail asked immediately, a worried tone in her voice and her hand found Sadie's forehead to check the temperature. She must have been watching Sadie the whole time.

"Just a headache," Sadie replied curtly. "You are still sitting. Lie down to me." She slipped aside to make room for Abigail and tried to say it as normal as possible, not to make a big deal out of it. That wasn't it, was it? Although it was not cold anymore and they relied on each other's body heat, Sadie's desire remained. Like an untamed flame spreading. When the words had left her mouth, her heart jumped.

Without saying anything, Abigail studied the woman next to her. She was still sitting, looking at Sadie and biting her lip. Abigail grimaced as she considered and just before Sadie regretted everything, very shortly before her heart had dropped into her pants, Abigail leaned on her hands, crawled the last track and lay down next to Sadie. If Sadie had allowed herself to exhale relieved , she would have simply done so. But too big was the probability that Abigail would have noticed.

Sadie had her head turned to heaven and studied the occupied horizon. She licked her lips and squinted at Abigail. Abigail was lying on her back with her hands folded on her stomach, her eyes up, just like Sadie's a few seconds ago. What did she think, what did she see in the thick cloud cover? Sadie turned to her, head and body were now turned to Abigail. Tied up, Sadie's eyes ran over Abigail's side profile. Her sweet nose, pretty lips, full, dark eyebrows that made Abigail's eyes light up and her shaped cheeks. Abigail tilted her head to one side and received Sadie with a smile. Sadie did not turn her eyes away, she looked at Abigail as if there was not the feeling that lurked in her that she was just caught. A sparkle appeared in Sadie's eyes as she returned the smile, without any control over it. Even in the dim, pale light that described that day, Abigail was beautiful. She was always beautiful and Sadie liked to enjoy her sight. If she squeezed her mouth and her nose bobbed at the movement, if she was worried and the lines creased between her eyebrows, or she was angry, or looked at Sadie, as if Abigail knew she was safe with Sadie and no one could hurt them. As in this moment. They stared intently at each other, seconds passed and neither seemed dare to avert each others eyes. Without interrupting eye contact, Abigail also turned her body to Sadie. Only centimeters separated them.

Sadie wanted to lick her suddenly dry lips, but all she did was open her lips a crack. A heavy swallow went down her throat, her chest dropping rhythmically to her faster breathing. Dilated pupils looked at Abigail's clear blue eyes. A strand of hair fell over Sadie's eyes, caught in her eyelashes. Slowly, Abigail reached out and gently brushed it behind Sadie's ear. Her fingertip moved tentatively over Sadie's stained cheek. Sadie could hear her heart drumming, a whispering shiver ran through her body and her hair reared up. Abigail kept her eyes, did not turn away, and her eyes twitched down for a moment. If Sadie hadn't seen it herself, it wouldn't have occurred to her to avert her gaze, she had not believed it herself.

Sadie was waiting for something, anything she could interpret as a sign. Until Abigail crept closer. In Sadie, everything was tingling, did she know how to interpret it correctly? Excitement shook her body, spurred the strained heart to beat faster and reached to the palate, beaten indiscriminately. The desire to take a deep breath tightened in Sadie, instead, she slid insecurely closer, never leaving the eyes of Abigails shining profoundly against her. Only a breath separated their lips, but before they touched, Abigail stopped and leaned her forehead against Sadie's. She closed her eyes and Sadie had no choice but to look at the full eyelashes. Her eyelids flickered, her hand on Sadie's cheek tightened and remained in half-fist on her cheekbone. Hot breath grazed Sadie's face and the tingling became stronger. Abigail's chest also dropped faster than it should.

Sadie would have liked to obey her heartbeat just to make sure. To hear and feel that she too exerted this influence on Abigail. Sadie remained silent, trying to keep her breathing under her command. Then Abigail's eyes flashed, catching Sadie's. It was a second, not more, and then Abigail's lips met hers. Surprised, Sadie let the air go, her heart skipped a beat, if not more, and began to race as if she had a marathon behind her. The tingling gave way to an explosion, flowing through Sadie's limbs and resting on her mind. Her body felt light and a heat ball flared through her upper body. A feeling that was familiar to her.

Shyly, Sadie returned the kiss and moved her lips to the beat of Abigail. Soft, gentle kisses. Hardly more than a whisper. Calmingly, Abigail's thumb stroked Sadie's cheek. Then it was over. Sadie opened her eyes and was awaited by Abigails.

"What are we doing here?" She whispered, while Abigail's eyes searched Sadies for answers.

"I do not know." Sadie really did not know.

"Should we stop?" Sadie's otherwise so big mouth could not make a sentence and was paralyzed, instead she shook her head barely noticeably. Even though Sadie didn't know what they were doing there, she knew she would not stop. To explore this feeling further. Abigail looked at her intently before her lips found Sadie again. They tenderly exchanged more kisses as if they had never stopped. And at that moment, Sadie wished it would never end. That they could lie there forever bathed in freedom, the excitement of the moment that played with Sadie's mind and threw a wave of happiness over her. Leave the real world behind and never turn up. Thinking about nothing, no pinkertons, no bandits or bounty hunters and no ... A nasty feeling wanted to fight through Sadie's conscience, which she put into the corner and held like a dog on the chain. Sadie could worry about that later. This moment, however, should last.

Shyly, Sadie put her hand on Abigail's waist and felt her belt, where her fingers stayed and played with the fabric of her blouse. The urge to touch Abigail became stronger, Sadie wanted to move closer, but not scare Abigail. So Sadie concentrated on her sweet lips and kept losing herself. Abigail stroked Sadie's hair and a pleasant warmth overcame her. Sadie held back a sigh and she would do nothing but keep going, but she retired, gave Abigail some more small kisses and stroked her cheek. A smile courted Sadie's mouth, quietly mirrored by Abigail. Before Sadie pulled her hand away, Abigail caught her and held it between her bodies.

Curious eyes looked at each other.

"I didn't know you could kiss so well." Teasing, Sadie grinned at the woman in front of her.

"Well, now you know. Better late than never." Abigail gave her a smug look that was replaced by a laugh. Her features changed smoothly into a thoughtful, serious look, and Sadie saw her bite her lip again.

Gently, Sadie stroked Abigail's face. "Sleep a little. I'll stay awake and watch." Sadie waited for an answer and could see in Abigail's face that she was wrestling with herself. But then she nudged Sadie gently on the shoulder, so that she turned on the back and Abigail could cuddle up to her. Without hesitating, she put her arm around Abigail. Sadie took a deep, relaxed breath. She liked the feeling Abigail gave her.

Fingertips danced over Sadie's stomach and a smile came over her lips.

"Let me take a look at your injury later." The woman in her arm audibly stifled a yawn. "The inflammation has already receded somewhat, but I want to make sure you do not have gangrene." Abigail's voice softened at last, and Sadie saw her eyes drop in exhaustion.

"Don't worry, I'm fine. Sleep well," Sadie whispered, stroking Abigail's dark hair, which was so soft between her fingers. In response, she got a tired nod and a soft sigh. A few minutes later, Abigail's breathing was even. A warm feeling was expressed in Sadie's heart. Sadie peered next to her and there lay the revolver Abigail had given her. She pulled it closer, just in case, and closed her eyes to bathe in the beautiful feeling that rested on her. How long she was there, Sadie could not say.

When Sadie opened her eyes lazily, it was already dark. As if horrified, Sadie opened her eyes. She must have fallen asleep. An owl cawed through the night, the sky was still overcast and showed no stars, mingling erratically with the creaking of the branches. Confused, Sadie looked around the grounds. Her eyes failed in the distance in the stinging darkness. Abigail didn't move, she had to sleep deeply. Calmly, Sadie let out her breath.

Indefinable cracking suddenly sufficed for Sadie's hearing. It was probably the horses, though Sadie's hand jerked to the Colt. There was no sign of it in the clearing. Carefully, Sadie crawled off Abigail and got into a sitting posture. She looked over her shoulder. Nothing, except rock and wood.

If anyone dares to come too close, Sadie would make those acquainted with her shooting irons and have them swallow the lead with pleasure. It was the middle of the night and every uninvited visitor turned into an enemy. The first shot would be a warning. The next one would sit. Deadly or wounded, Sadie would decide.

Outlines attracted Sadie's attention. Narrowed eyes stared into the darkness. There was something, Sadie's eyes hadn't betrayed her. The horses, of course. The hand holding the revolver kneaded her forehead. A headache had become noticeable. The darkness and the ongoing paranoia, someone could ambush them, doesn't get her good. Unbelieving herself, Sadie poked the air between her lips in an annoyed tone. Where should that lead to? Just as she was about to sit back, back in Abigail's cautious embrace, she was stopped. At first it was a movement in the corner of her eye, which was quickly followed by her head. When she thought she had fallen for a brain ghost again, Sadie's eyes fixed one point in front of her. Between the trees. Sadie's brows drew together and she jumped to her feet, a pull in her lower body accompanied her. The hand wrapped itself more tightly around the iron, her finger stretched tightly on the trigger. How many times had she succumbed to this intoxication?

Sadie licked her lips, squinting at Abigail, who did not notice anything. It was better. Who was this, the one who approached so slowly? Was it someone she knew, maybe Charles? Could it ... No, Sadie didn't believe it. That could not be. That was not allowed. Not now. The timing was not right. Sadie thought she would have some more time. To give the feelings a name. Suddenly her hand became sweaty and the wood of the handle seemed out of place in her fingers.

The thick clouds didn't allow light to flood, trapping the moon between an impenetrable wall as if to deny Sadie all help. Who the hell was that? She took slow steps towards the figure, keeping aware that she was standing in Abigail's line, so there was no clear view of her. Anyone who wanted to go to Abigail had to compete with Sadie first. A bloodthirsty smile broke on her lips.

If it were somebody they knew, he would have noticed it long ago. Sadie excluded every acquaintance.

"Who are you?" Sadie asked, raising the revolver. A dark, dirty laugh reached her ears. She cocked the hammer, which in the silence produced a meaningful click.

"Don't be silly, take the gun down, lady." His voice was smoky, he sounded amused. Then he did not know who he was dealing with.

"I give the instructions. Hands up," Sadie ordered, her tone was nothing but biting rage. He swung from foot to foot and before Sadie could react, he looked around her.

"Well, who is the beauty?" He simpered in a melodic tone. 

"She belongs to Me. Don't touch her, "Sadie growled. He laughed again, as if Sadie had told a joke. There was nothing to laugh about. Nothing at all. "Get out before I blow a hole in your skull."

"Oh no. I just wanted to look around a bit, no one could have guessed that this place is occupied," he replied and gestured with his arms. Sadie did not trust this guy and knew she should banish him into the happy hunting grounds. Even if he disappeared, that kind of guy would keep coming back, until he had what he wanted. But what was that?

"You should pick up your hands, I said," she replied simply. He made a move that said she should calm down.

"I have understood. Give me a second and I'm gone," he said, his tone betraying nothing about him. Sadie watched his act skeptically, weapon still aimed at him. His hands were raised, slowly turning his back to Sadie, a lithe movement. Suddenly his hand jumped to a holster, his turn ended at 360 ° and Sadie's finger squeezed the trigger before his arm was at full arm length. His head bounced heavily on the back of his neck, the shot pierced the night's sleep. Birds flinched from the surrounding trees and, cawing, as if complaining about the disturbance, fluttered into the gloomy sky. The man fell backwards on the sodden grass and remained motionless.

Sadie's heart throbbed. This time for quite different reasons than a few hours ago. But he was dead. Nothing happened. Well, at least she and Abigail were fine. Bastard saw it coming. Just as Sadie stowed her revolver, hand still on the handle, and had turned half to Abigail, she was already in front of her and had worried eyes fixed on Sadie. Abigail grabbed her by the shoulder and looked behind Sadie, studying the area behind her.

"What's going on?" She asked, Sadie did not fail to notice that she was suppressing something in her voice as if she did not want to express all her emotion. Somewhat confused, Sadie looked back.

"The bastard was after us," she said, pointing to the spot where he lay lifeless on the ground, a black outline in the dark meadow. Abigail's eyes ran across the square. Her eyebrows twitched briefly and Sadie knew something was wrong. "What's going on, Abigail?" Sadie asked, concern rising in her voice. Instead of answering, she stared into Sadie's eyes and tried to find words. Sadie grabbed her by the shoulders, she needed to know if something was wrong. Did Abigail know this man? What had Sadie done wrong? "Please, tell me what's going on." Sadie relaxed her grip and dropped her hands to the side, Abigail swallowed visibly.

"Sadie ... there's nobody." Abigail's voice was muffled, but it sounded loud in Sadie's ear. As if struck by lightning, Sadie turned her head and her pupils landed on a pure grass cover, where the corpse of an unwelcome guest lay before. Frantically, her eyes flew over every corner of the clearing. But she found nothing. There was nothing there. There had never been anyone there, it came to her. A logical conclusion that now spread in her mind.

"It's alright," Abigail said solicitously before placing a hand on Sadie's forehead. Somewhat lost Sadie looked in Abigail's loving eyes, no fear was reflected in them, only concern. "The fever is back. Sadie, you are not feeling well. You literally glowing." Abigail looked around, but kept her concern for herself. "Lie down, we'll take you to the doctor tomorrow morning."

"No I'm fine. We can't afford a doctor. This is already gone, just patience. I'm fine, really," Sadie soothed.

"You're hallucinating. Where are you fine? "Abigail put her hands on her hip. Sadie made a dismissive gesture.

"You'll see," Sadie said, which caused Abigail to shake her head.

"Do me a favor and lie down, you need to rest." Sadie looked at the woman in front of her and she realized that a discussion would have no way out and it was best to do what Abigail asked.

"Fine," Sadie answered curtly.

"Thank you." Relief swung in her voice. Sadie was sure it was not the fever when a wave of heat overcame her. She liked how they cared for each other and looked after each other's well-being. With a hidden smile, Sadie sat down on the blanket and stared at the fireplace not far away. Once they sat there all together, the smell of fire and whiskey filled the air and the mood was cheerful. Many stories were told at this fire and also remained in Sadie's memory.

Although it was not her time, lost in her grief, she became a member of this gang in this place. Abigail was the one who came to her, as she often did, and offered to stay.

Sadie was not sure at the time, though the decision had long since been made.

Now it was just black, charred ashes, decaying in front of a deserted tree trunk, only hinting at what was going on there. But Sadie saw the ghosts of the past clearly before her eyes. Was it the fever? How the people in the camp marched across the clearing, doing their daily tasks and welcoming the change in the weather. They had all been suffering the cold. At times, that made Sadie smile, before she became too aware of everything around her and it shattered, the bitter taste of betrayal on her tongue. How could she smile if her husband was dead?

In the time Sadie had taken a book to immerse herself in another world and to escape the evil of the world, when she herself failed to take the cliff as a way out. Mary-Beth's glances and the sweet smile she set. The girl loved books and would have loved to talk about it. But Sadie was rather shorthanded at this time and left little room for her to befriend.

Then there were Susan, Karen and Tilly. Miss Grimshaw knew how to place a swift kick to the girls butts and shooed them back to work whenever they took too long breaks. Laziness wasn't tolerated. Karen probably hated her like no other. She seemed to have a thing for Sean, though she didn't always made that clear. After his death, she had drunk more than ever. Her statement to Susan as she pumped Molly lead through her body showed her how she saw things. A woman who had loved.

Tilly was the most insignificant, besides Mary-Beth. Who would believe she had already killed someone? But it was like that. Sadie knew it from Arthur. Sweet girl, had a lot through. Like everyone of them, she carried her past with her, the demons, lurking on lonely nights.

Suddenly Sadie became aware of a new, how much had happened and what should have happened differently. Would they still make one today? The gang was a family, and Sadie had become friends with the idea of being a part of them. A part of something big. But it was already too late. Dutch Plan led them all astray, if not Dutch himself. Sadie had no doubt that he meant well. In the end, however, he had lost himself, plunged into a cause that could and should never have been. As an outlaw, your deeds will catch you sooner or later. Like every other human being too.

But who knows what would have happened if Micah had not been. The rat nestling on Dutch's shoulder, whispering in his ear. A leader was manipulated. In search of the wealth with which he could buy himself and his family freedom, enable a beautiful life. Family. When did it start, was it already in Colter? Micah ... But without him, would they have found Sadie at all? If someone else had been on clientele, would they have found the ranch? Or wouldn't the whole gang without Micah have even landed there? Sadie wondered if Colm and his bastards would ever have landed there without these events. She lost herself in that thought, a tangled web that did not seem to end, and when it did, it was tying new threads and tempting Sadie to new questions. As if her head was not droning enough already.

Abigail's hand on her shoulder pulled her out of the flood of her mind-chaos. She looked up in Abigail's unfathomable blue eyes. Suddenly Sadie felt weak. So weak. Leached of the whole time. Sadie dropped into Abigail's arms, a protective hug, and thought for a moment how Jack felt when Abigail held him in her arms. Soothing humming came from Abigail's throat, Sadie simply closed her eyes and didn't think further. Certainly not that she was no longer a small child and didn't want to be treated that way. But that was fine for the night. It was good, she could let go. The pressure on her head slowed down. Abigail's fingers brushing through her hair relaxed Sadie, there was nothing but ease. And at some point, Sadie had come to sleep.


	12. Seasons

Sadie's body felt like a dozen horses trampled on her. Her muscles ached and were weak. Through her closed eyelids, she realized that it had to be daylight. A faint sigh escaped Sadie's lips.

"How are you?" Asked a soft voice beside her. With a tired smile, Sadie nodded her head in the direction of the voice and opened her eyes. Wearily she looked into Abigail's pretty face. Before Sadie could say anything, Abigail checked her temperature. "We should go to the doctor in Valentine." When Sadie heard that, the sleep was wiped away, suddenly she felt awake and wanted to convince Abigail that she lacked nothing.

"No," Sadie said simply. Even for talking, she felt too exhausted. A questioning look focused on Sadie. Then Sadie shook her head to make herself more explicit. Abigail grimaced and silently pulled Sadie's shirt up over her belly button. Iron eyes fixed on Sadie's and she looked patiently back.

"Look at it." Abigail demanded after a few seconds and nodded her head to her wound. Sadie straightened, holding Abigail's gaze until her eyes slid to her injury. Surprised, Sadie blinked, she opened her mouth and was about to say something, but stopped in motion and stared at the badly reddened injury.

"What do you say now?"

"We can't afford a doctor," Sadie called to her words from before. "It'll be over in a few days. Believe me, this is not my first injury. Just give me some more of Charles's healing juice." Abigail looked at her incredulously.

"At your own risk." Abigail's words were firm and her eyes hard.

"I know." Sadie returned Abigail's fixed gaze without giving in. She could read anger from Abigail's features, the concern had to hide underneath at that moment. A sharp sparkle emanated from Abigail's eyes and her nostrils trembled.

"Here's your juice," she said, voice softer than Sadie had expected, and held the cup in front of Sadie's face.

"Thanks." Sadie felt the air crackle around them and was charged high. She had even expected a snappy response, but Abigail only rolled her eyes and her face was clearly in her disfavor. Sadie wanted to get up to prove Abigail that she had no problem with the infection. However, she felt weak and knew that Abigail would be anything but good. So Sadie stayed, drinking from the juice she wanted to spit right out and exchanging tense glances with Abigail. Then she noticed a change in Abigail's features, her eyes grew warmer, and she dropped her head with a sigh. 

"I don't want to argue with you, Sadie. But I'm worried. What if I lose you to an infection?" Her otherwise glittering eyes were now dull, and Sadie remembered saying that sentence to Abigail once. They could obviously argue well.

"Do you really think I would leave you here alone? Then you really don't know me at all." Sadie eyed Abigail with a scrutinizing look and showed her a chuckle that should take the seriousness.

"I could hardly bear another loss." Abigail's voice was barely above a whisper, her eyes clouded and downcast. Sadie straightened up, she didn't pay attention to the pain in the side, only Abigail gave her a look, and took Abigail's hand in hers.

"I will not die. I will not leave you alone. Promise. "Sadie led Abigail's hand to her heart. "Do you feel it?" Then Abigail met Sadie's gaze and it was as if the shine would come into her eyes again. She tensely nodded.

"Thanks, Sadie," Abigail whispered. Sadie gave her a wry smile and played with Abigail's fingers in her hand before placing a soft kiss on the back of her hand.

The exhaustion was still dragging on her and Sadie's eyelids became heavy. A colossus of a moose had to trample on her forehead, judging by her headache. But it was all worth it. For Sadie, it had meaning. Pain or not, the fever or a small infection, to hell with it. Sadie had to smile like a stupid idiot at the moment, looking at Abigail with her eyes half open, her hand still enclosed. She felt soft fingers sliding down her cheeks as the thumb stroked the side of her mouth. The eyes closed and a deep, pleasant breath passed through Sadie's lungs.

Whatever happened, Sadie told herself, she was going to survive. How not? Abigail would follow her all the way to hell, just to tell her, "I told you so." And the satisfaction, Sadie would certainly not give her. Because Sadie was strong. Stronger than ever.

Abigail feared the loss, as did Sadie. After the gang, there was nothing else. They have seen so many people dying. Friend, like enemy. A word that has since been capitalized. Loss.

Sadie would take the bad thoughts from Abigail. She had no intention of dying and leaving Abigail alone. After all, that was the last thing she could do.

It was enough that Sadie worried about losing Abigail, even if she would never let that happen. Each bullet that was intended for Abigail, Sadie would capture. Any sling that held Abigail's name would be shattered by Sadie. Any man or woman, it did not matter, who dared to touch Abigail would come in touch with Sadie.

Abigail had a son and she deserved to live. None of them was innocent. But what was innocence in this life, what did it mean? Survival was not one of it. To shoot dirty bastards on the pile, perhaps, but Sadie had freed the world of lousy bastards. No guilt to take care of her. It were all bandits who deserved it. Men who had no fear or even shame and would cause trouble as long as they were on this earth.

But that did not matter, because it's irrelevant. They had come this far and that counted. Continue, not give up. Even if Sadie couldn't say what would come next and happen. There was never a long silence until the next incident. Should Sadie blame herself? She doesn't even know when it started that the events went to Sadie and not the other way around. Actually, yes, but she didn't want to name it. Was he guilty then? Sometimes Sadie wondered how he could just leave her there. Even if he had no choice. But it was the love that finally made her so strong. Pure hate, would have killed her directly. Sadie knew it. She knew herself.

Since then, Sadie has carried this purity in her heart. If she did not know what to do, if everything seemed doomed to fail, she thought of Jake. The feeling he gave her. And let her go on, even after his demise. It was him why Sadie was where she was now. That she was breathing. Even if she would rather have died to be with him than to spend another second in the evil that was called life. 

Then there was Abigail, who showed her how to be strong, even when sadness gnawed her from the inside out. Maybe it was fate, though Sadie did not believe in something like that, that had driven her into the arms of this woman. Just like Jake had given her protection, it now was Abigail who created a related feeling in her. Sadie realized that. Why else, were Abigail's hugs like a protective cloak and her closeness, like sweet oblivion? Sadie needed Abigail to keep going. She would not die, just as Abigail would not die. Abigail. Sadie's retreat.

\--

It wasn't the last day that hit hard on Sadie. The fever continued, bad rage breaking over her body. Fluctuations in temperature played with Sadie's mind, weakening her cramped body without remorse. Soaking wet, Sadie turned under the blanket, her fingers rigidly clenched in the fabric or limp beside her, or Sadie was filled with miserable trembling, her entire limbs tense and shaking the leached body. All the while, Abigail was on Sadie's side. Did not leave her. Lying down to her and hugging Sadie when chills came over her. If it was the fever, she dipped the rag in the small bucket beside her and patiently dabbed Sadie's forehead.

"What are you doing Abigail? You can not do that, in front of all the people. I'm fine with it, but ... -," Sadie murmured and her voice muffled in her throat. That had to be kisses, Sadie was sure. She was puzzled that Abigail wasn't shy and that she didn't care. Of course, Abigail always showed her new sides! A childlike smile played on Sadie's face. This woman was good for surprises, she liked that and Sadie was open for every fun. The intense glances of those around them doesn't matter Sadie in the least. That gave her more reason to enjoy herself. Snotty philistines from the industrial city, who scrutinized one critically. At least something that they were good at. 

"Look, over there, his eyes almost fall out of it's sockets," she mumbled and Abigail looked at her with a teasing grin. This grin pleased Sadie, as well as Abigail's waiting surprises. She wanted to see that more often. Sadie examined her with a challenging look and a smile. "What would they do if it was the mouth?" Sadie asked, her eyebrows flickering up and Abigail's beautiful eyes sparkling. It didn't need words, that was an invitation. The eyes clearly told Sadie to try it out. Consciously, Sadie grinned at Abigail and wanted to approach her lips. Wanted, since she could not do it, as much as Sadie tried. Abigail smiled delightedly at her, as if she couldn't wait, but just so, she seemed to be out of reach. Sadie came into contact with nothing but air. It obviously doesn't need to be explained how frustrating it was for Sadie.

Until unexpectedly whispering lips stroked her. Surprised, Sadie opened her lips and gasped, pausing for a moment, before she moved her lips and Abigail fought a fight. The people around them were nothing more than shadowy ghosts dancing vaguely around them like creeping fog. In the middle the two women, coordinated movements that startled the butterflies in Sadie's stomach.

Breathless Sadie came to a stop, she was hot and her breathing accelerated, the heart throbbed carelessly against her chest. Sadie dropped her head in all directions, trying to control her breathing, slowly opening her eyes. But instead of large-scale facades, as she saw in Saint Denis, she came in contact with Abigail's blue eyes, green leaves around the trees, baptizing the clearing in color, and above her the blue sky holding gray clouds in the distance. Despite everything, the light was glaring at Sadie's eyes and she pinched them instantly shut. Meanwhile, Abigail's hand found Sadie's cheek and patted it gently.

"Hey, you all right?" She asked, clearly hearing the concern. Carefully, Sadie peered through her eyelids and nodded slightly depressed.

"Yeah ... I was just dreaming," she said while Abigail dipped a cloth in the bucket next to her and drove it over Sadie's brow. Her whole body felt sticky, the last few days she had sweated out all the body fluids she had. Sadie pulled her necktie over her head to get rid of the feeling the air was tied up in her throat, and with trembling hands opened two more buttons on her blouse, her ribcage still sinking faster than usual. Then she grabbed Abigail's hand, or rather the cloth in her hands, and led the pleasant wetness over her neck to the chest. Abigail watches the whole thing, never letting go of the cloth. The moisture left a trail and the tepid wind draft made Sadie feel comfortable. Relieved, she breathed.

"I'm sorry, Sadie, I didn't want that. I thought ..." Sadie's eyes widened.

"That wasn't a dream?" In response, Abigail stared at her with her shiny eyes. Sadie didn't know what Abigail had expected, but Sadie started to laugh hoarsely, realizing that she was still holding the cloth with Abigail's hand in hers. Abigail, on the other hand, kept staring before her eyes followed Sadie's and rested on her hands. Demanding, challenging, Sadie looked at her.

"You were dreaming." Abigail said after a while, looking at Sadie. A grin hit Sadie's face.

"Do not mess with me." Abigail leaned over her, the grin on her face not going away from Sadie's lips, and looking deep into her eyes.

"I do not," she said, kissing Sadie briefly, who followed her eyes with Abigail's lips and found back to her eyes when it was over. "Convinced?"

"More than that. Liar." Sadie jerked the cloth from her fingers and dropped her head back onto the blanket before dabbing her neck. That made Abigail look at Sadie with raised eyebrows.

"Well, it was not a dream.", She admitted and smiled sheepishly, while Sadie glanced at her, clearly indicating that she was right and that she could not be fooled.

The brief burst of energy had passed and Sadie felt the fever on her body. Sadie's breathing, however, had finally calmed down and she managed to survive the hot flash. Nevertheless, she felt exhausted. But Sadie was in good spirits and estimated that she had left the worst behind. In a few days, she should be fit again and they could travel further. Even if no one had crossed their path at this place, the longer they stayed, the greater the risk of the appearance of an uninvited guest. This time none Sadie would fantasize.

Sadie felt as if she was suffering from a nasty poisoning, when the sudden change of hot flash once again led to chills. She clenched her teeth as an uncomfortable shower seized her body, put the damp cloth aside and pulled the blanket up to her chin.

"Make some room." Abigail ordered and scurried under the covers as Sadie did as she was commanded. Abigail lay down with Sadie, feeling Abigail's body against hers and wrapping her arms around Abigail's upper body to keep her as close as possible. The soft contours of Abigail perfectly snuggled against Sadie's and the dark-haired one rested her head on Sadie's chest. The heat was noticeable, but the shivering continued. But Sadie could not imagine anything better than this moment. Just be together and feel the warmth of the other. And once again, Sadie's eyes closed heavy, Abigail in her arms, and sleep pushed her consciousness aside.

\-- 

When Sadie woke up, she felt knackered. The body aches had passed, and apart from the feeble feeling, Sadie felt better. Her throat was dry, so she drank the rest of the nasty juice. At least it gave her a clear conscience to drink this groats. Abigail was no longer with her, instead Sadie saw her at the fire place, where a fire was burning and smoke was rising in the air. Her back was turned to Sadie.

As Sadie's muscles felt limp after all these days, she straightened slowly. The burn on the former bullet wound was a small pull through the seam. Curiously, Sadie pulled up her shirt and inspected the wound. In fact, it had gotten better. Redness was still evident, but it didn't stick further around the suture. A good sign, Sadie would say. She owed it to Abigail's nourishing arts; she had taken good care of the cleansing, though Sadie hadn't always been aware in her suffering fever, and probably Charles's herbalism as well.

Sadie was about to get up and stretch her legs after being tied to bed for so long before she had the feeling that she was unlearning to walk. So Sadie straightened up and the first thing she did was stretch. Very extensive. The tension vanished from her limbs and relief came over Sadie. But before Sadie could take a step towards Abigail, she was already standing studying Sadie.

"Do not say anything. I'd like to stretch my legs and can handle it without falling over," Sadie said, leaving no time for Abigail to open her mouth first.

"Understood." Abigail nodded and Sadie was amazed that she gave in without a word. Which didn't affect her negatively. As she stood in front of her, she eyed Abigail skeptically. "What?" She asked.

"I'm just surprised that you don't say anything else."

"That's all right," she replied, leaving Sadie in the dark, whether she meant Sadie's amazement or her missing resist words. Abigail took a step toward Sadie and closed the distance between them. Her eyes slid a little lower and before Sadie knew what to do, Abigail's hands wandered to the buttons of her half-open shirt and buttoned it carefully. A reddish glow settled on Sadie's cheeks. She had completely forgotten that.

"We should get out of here soon," Sadie said, foresawing Abigail's concern why she kept talking quickly. "I don't do anything you wouldn't do," she added with a raised finger. Abigail grimaced for a moment before nodding.

"You're right. We've been here too long." Abigail paused. "Would you mind putting a stop in Valentine?"

Sadie sighed heavily. "I'm feeling better. I will not go to the doctor. That being said, we hardly have a dollar together. "

On Abigail's features appeared a smile that disappeared instantly through the purse on her lips. Sadie didn't know why Abigail was smiling, but she didn't have to look twice to see that the woman was against her opinion.

"It would be better to have a professional look at it."

"You know what happened in Valentine." Sadie really didn't feel like being watched by a so-called "expert" when she was sure she was feeling better. Besides, only the thought of Valentine felt insecure.

"I know." Abigail lowered her eyes and conveyed the feeling that the subject had ended. Sadie was surprised that Abigail didn't care.

"Okay," she said. "At your own risk," Sadie repeated Abigail's own words a few days ago, whereupon Abigail nodded affirmatively.

\--

When Sadie saddled Arthur the next morning, she felt much better than the day before. She came back to old forces. Sadie had missed controlling her body. Although it was nice how Abigail had looked after her, and how it was, but Sadie was only half herself if she couldn't fight back. And faltering Sadie didn't help anyone. Not even her own. Nevertheless, she still lacked something.

"Abby, did you see my hat?" Abigail walked around Bob and looked perplexed at Sadie.

"You ain't had it since the party." Sadie could clearly hear her voice derogatively emphasizing the word "party."

"Oh," escaped Sadie's throat. She had missed that in the hustle and bustle. She grimaced. "Crap."

"Don't worry." Abigail gave her a fleeting smile before swaying on Bob. Sadie shrugged indecisively and pulled onto Arthur's back. Then they rode off. To Valentine. Where it all started. There, where Sadie had first captured this lousy bullet wound. And where Sadie had seen Abigail the first time through different eyes. How dramatic. But that's exactly how it was. Sadie remembered it clearly. It was after the fight. Nerve-racking. The soft contours of her face that were so beautiful to look at, even in the dim light.

Slowly, Sadie believed that everything had a purpose. Like the deafening shot cut through her flesh. Sadie could recognize and see. That, after all her wishes for the dead, there was more than this. And she hoped, yes, she hoped that Abigail saw it the same way. Because cope with a dead was never easy. But there was light, sometimes dark, hidden behind thick clouds, and unwilling to dawn. But the time is coming, for the world is turning and the sky was about to break and show all the beautiful colors it has for everyone. Someday. Sadie almost believed that day was approaching her. For on the horizon were not only gloomy clouds to see, which had made the sky quite a while. An endless black with destructive storms, striking lightnings, rumbling thunder and dripping rain. A thin smile crept up on Sadie's lips and she lowered her head. Yes, quite possible.

Valentine was only minutes away. With critical eyes, Sadie looked at the city from afar. It looked so unimpressive, for the things that had happened there. The mist of her breath rose in front of Sadie's eyes and dissolved in the fresh morning air. The sandy road gave way to soft trampled mud of the city and splashed with every hoof beat. Sadie shook the evil spirits away and fought the urge to solve her revolver from its holster.

Abigail rode beside her and had a stony expression on her face. What she felt, Sadie could only guess.

Abigail stopped at the post in front of the post office. A few feet away, Sadie came to a stop. Shrugging, she turned Arthur and directed him next to Bob.

Abigail rode beside her and had a stony expression on her face. What she felt, Sadie could only guess.

Abigail stopped at the post in front of the post office. A few feet away, Sadie came to a stop. Shrugging, she turned Arthur and directed him next to Bob.

"I don't need long, I just want to see if a letter has arrived," Abigail said. "You can wait, if you prefer." Sadie could have imagined, if she had thought about it. So not a doctor, Sadie thought. Was she disappointed that Abigail dropped the subject so fast? Now the smile made sense, too, Sadie remembered. Abigail had allowed herself a joke.

"I will not leave you alone in Valentine again.", Sadie replied, referring to the precedents, while the next moment she jumped off the horse and walked beside Abigail.

Without hesitation, Abigail strode purposefully toward the man in uniform, leaving Sadie behind her. The man wore a well-groomed beard that hid some of his face and his eyes spoke of another lackluster day in his life. When he noticed Abigail, he adjusted his cap and cleared his throat with his hand at the mouth.

"How can I help you, Miss?" He asked, trying to give her a charming smile that was anything but picturesque to Sadie.

"I wanted to pick up a letter. Kilgore." Abigail gave him a short smile. What reminded Sadie of someone who wanted to get it over with as quickly as possible. Reason number one, the guy whose job was to manage the mail. Reason number two, the city. Not the other way around.

"Kilgore, Kilgore ..." Sadie heard him mumble as he stepped away from the counter and rummaged through papers until he fell silent. "Ah, there we have it!" He exclaimed. With a little too much enthusiasm, Sadie meant. He went back to the opening and Sadie looked intently over Abigail's shoulder. A simple white envelope he handed to Abigail.

"Please, Mrs. Kilgore. The letter has been waiting for your arrival for a few days," he said, bobbing from back to front. Sadie almost rolled her eyes.

"Thanks, mister ..." Sadie paused. He didn't wear a name tag. "Mister. That's it for now. Have a nice day," she finished her sentence and made a waving gesture, looked at Abigail with an expectant look over her shoulder, and nodded toward the exit.

"Goodbye," Abigail said, Sadie couldn't see her face, but she was almost sure that Abigail had given him an apologetic look. Finally, Sadie rolled her eyes and walked to the door behind Abigail.

"Don't think I didn't see that," Abigail said. "You know what I mean," she hung up when Sadie opened her mouth to ask her what she meant. A small laugh escaped Sadie. She had to admit her defeat.

The door swung open and Sadie had been expecting the first rays of sunshine, instead they were greeted by a cloudy sky stretching for miles. For days it was gray. Although Sadie had not heard much about it, the fever had taken her, but the times she could think clearly and her eyes were open there was nothing but gray. Sadie knew what that meant. Time that the sky relieved itself.

"What do you say, how far can we make it until the storm starts?" Abigail asked, looking up as well as Sadie.

"From here, no further than Emerald Station. A few miles." Abigail glanced at Sadie.

"Let's ride to Rhodes. Once the storm is over, we stay on the edge of the swamps and flee further north," Abigail suggested. "Maybe we could visit Charles for a few days on the reserve."

Sadie checked the sky once more. It was a long way to Rhodes, even farther than the Emerald Station, and she was sure the storm was halfway there. Nevertheless, Sadie found Abigail's suggestion not uninteresting. If someone was hot on their heels, and Sadie tapped on it, because even if the Pinkertons did not follow them, there were plenty of bounty hunters who would look forward to a payoff, then near the swamps they would have a good chance of losing the pursuers or at least misleading them. The mountains offered shelter, Sadie had recognized that early on, and with the Indians they could have a little rest. Charles was there too. And until the storm was over, they would find the necessary shelter in Rhodes. Because Sadie expected more than a little rain and thunder.

"Okay, you convinced me," Sadie agreed, turning her gaze from the sky.

Then they rode off. Again and again, her eyes found their way to the black clouds that lay so ominously on the horizon. Wind flowed warningly through Sadie's hair, cool and determined, even pleasant, and made the grassy areas of land dance to its nose. The threatening freshness that the wind carried with it, lay down conspiratorially to Sadie's body and wanted to tell her to turn.

"We better hurry up. That ain't looking good." Sadie said and urged Arthur to run faster. A look over her shoulder told her that Abigail was doing the same, but still struggling to stay close behind Sadie. Sadie couldn't blame her, because Abigail didn't ride as often as Sadie did. But Sadie was surprised that Abigail didn't ask her to ride slower. So she did it herself and fell back until she was on par with Abigail.

"We can ride slower if you prefer," she said, giving Abigail a small smile.

"That's not necessary ... But if you want ..." Clearly, it was Abigail's pride speaking, but the small uncertainty in her voice didn't escape Sadie.

"Yes, I want to," Sadie laughed, whereupon Abigail gave her a look with a glint in the eyes.

Just before the border to Lemoyne, the sky was darker than Sadie suspected. The darkness dominated the sky and cast a single huge shadow over the accursed land. No stain was spared. And then the first thunder roared between heaven and earth. Arthur shook his head at the sound, Sadie's eyes darting to Abigail.

It shone brightly in the distance, for a moment Sadie could see the colors of the surroundings glowing brightly before everything fell back under a dominant darkness. The first drops fell, shattering on the leather of the saddle. Sadie's skin was tickled by the escaped tears of the clouds. It seemed like a tragedy to which everyone was invited.

The two women rode directly into the storm, the wind increased dramatically and lashed Sadie the raindrops carelessly in the face. Meanwhile, the initial drizzle had given way to a patter and crashed noisily to the ground. Sadie wiped her wet face with her sleeve and squinted. The branches of trees and bushes were carried away by the wind and had to surrender to the gusts. It pulled hard on Sadie's wet clothes and shivered her body.

Rhodes could not be far away. Roaring thunder and bright flashes of light wanted to attract attention. Successful, because Sadie let her eyes circle restlessly over the sky, minute by minute, she became more queasy. The storm was not far away, it was less than ten miles. If the wind kept beating then there was a danger that they would go straight in and Sadie was not keen on being struck by lightning or witnessing Abigail being caught. But Sadie was in good spirits, almost on par with Southfield Flats, a body of water in Scarlett Meadows and just minutes from Rhodes.

Suddenly, it crashed, Sadie winced, Arthur made an abrupt stop and Sadie flew almost head first out of the saddle. At the same moment sparks flew through Sadie's field of view, everything was brightened for a second by a higher power, and in the corner of her eye she could see Abigail clinging to Bob's neck. The horse had to have suffered a shock and noticed the sudden stop in the last seconds, which is why he now wanted to make a sharp turn, therefore he kinked to the side and Abigail lost her footing. Sadie could only see Abigail hurled relentlessly into the grass the next moment. Instead, she sat dripping wet on Arthur and stretched out her hand helplessly to Abigail. When Sadie realized what had happened, she jumped off her horse, almost falling to the ground herself, and ran to Abigail. Behind her, Sadie heard Bob neighing in panic and hitting the mud with his hooves. Next to Abigail, Sadie dropped to her knees and held her by the shoulder.

"Are you hurt?" Sadie asked troubled and had the picture of the fall in the inner eye. Sadie couldn't see her face, Abigail was lying on her stomach with her back to her. Seconds passed when Sadie held her breath.

"I'm fine," Abigail said muffled, after what felt like eternity, and Sadie breathed in relief. Slowly Abigail turned on her back, while Sadie kept her hands steady near Abigail's body if she needed help. It was dark, but Sadie could see the dark outlines of the dirt on her face the impact had given her.

Crackles hit Sadie's ears, which was covered even by the pouring rain. She threw her head in all directions until Sadie saw it. Warm light showed itself between the trees and flickered to itself. As if on command, another rumble and the following lightning sounded, dipping the dark sky into a cold blue.

"We need to get out of here," Sadie said, looking around agitated, helping Abigail to her feet. Sadie did not want to make it a topic, but she guessed Abigail had taken more than she wanted to admit. Sadie bit back and calmed Bob.

"I can't do that again." Sadie heard Abigail say and her eyes automatically went to the rebellious sky. Sadie gritted her teeth. She grabbed Bob by the reins and guided him to Arthur, who shook his head wildly. Then she pulled herself on the saddle horn on the horse's back.

"Then we'll do it together." Sadie said, holding out her hand to Abigail. Sadie saw the hesitation in her face, a shifting look from Bob to Sadie sitting on Arthur's back. When the next clap of thunder sounded, Abigail's hand was already in Sadie's, a dependable grip, and shortly afterwards they were on the move again. Bob's rein in one and Arthur's in the other, Sadie urged the horses to give their whole. And behind her Abigail, like then, how she had both arms swung around Sadie's waist and pressed against her.

The horses' hooves pounded across the muddy roads of Rhodes, the puddles shuddering and splashing in all directions, pursued by lightning and thunder. Empty streets welcomed the women, aggressive rain replaced the citizens of the city. Without much thought, Sadie headed for the inn at the near end of the city.

Quickly she tied the reins around the wood and pushed Abigail to the door of the white building, Sadie paid no attention to the bushes in front of the hut. The terrace was completely deserted, but Sadie heard muffled voices behind the door, which grew suddenly louder as the door opened. As usual, a local cloud of smoke slammed towards her and flowed through Sadie's trachea. Including the smell of hard liquor of which people wouldn't be dissuaded, even if the world went down. In the weather, Sadie wouldn't have counted on so many people, a few more than a dozen, and she wondered if the gentlemen were aware of the storm or if it passed them indiscriminately.

The people here were neatly dressed, but that did not bother Sadie. Out of place was only the one who felt like it. Sadie certainly not. Abigail, on the other hand, judging by her gaze, already. Because she looked uncertainly over her shoulder in Sadie's eyes, meaningful enough. Here again, Abigail's dirty cheek stung Sadie's eye. 

Still, she shoved Abigail in front of her, her boots clacking loudly on the wooden floor, leaving behind a film of mud and a lot of rainwater that was not just dripping off her boots, and she went to the counter first. Soaked from head to toe.

Foreign pairs of eyes followed the newcomers, Sadie could feel their curious, perhaps even disdainful glances. She left nothing to point to, because basically she did not care. None of these spinners in the saloon was better than them.

When the keeper looked up, Sadie gave him a hand gesture that they needed a moment. Sadie had no money left. But Abigail waved him close, his head jerked up again and caught the movement, whereupon he came waddling and gave Sadie a dirty look. Provocative, Sadie raised an eyebrow and fixed him with a look that said he was welcome to try.

Before any sort of altercation came, Abigail intervened, leaning against the counter and leaned over it.

"One room and two whiskey," she ordered and Sadie wasn't sure for a moment if she had heard correctly. Abigail and whiskey? Abigail and alcohol at all? Except wine, of course. Somewhat surprised, but impressed, Sadie looked at the dark-haired woman, supporting one arm at the counter and tapping her fingers rhythmically on the wood.

"I don't want to complain. But since when do you drink whiskey?"

"I don't. But after the days, I was looking for something new."

"That's ... unbelievably reasonable."

"I know," Abigail answered briefly, but emphasized, her eyes flashing and she gave a fleeting smile to Sadie, which vanished as she turned to the innkeeper and paid him. Sadie watched it all with watchful eyes until she followed Abigail up the stairs to the first floor and didn't open her mouth until they were in the room.

"Where did you get the money from?" Sadie gave her a look and put the glasses on the next cupboard. Mild light flickered in the holders, which was trumpeted for a moment by a nearby lightning strike, and the shadows on the walls lent an eerie touch in the glare before it was replaced by the warm candlelight.

Abigail shrugged. "You know that I have my methods." Whereupon Sadie approached her with a mischievous smile. As she stood in front of Abigail, for the first time, she looked right into her face ever since the storm began. Sadie put her fingers under Abigail's face, her thumb against her chin, and waved it slightly in the dim light, which flickered unreliably.

"Your pretty face ...", Sadie said and approached the scratch on her face. It wasn't just dirt, as Sadie had previously assumed, there was a bloody gravel underneath the layer that had mingled with the dirt. Carefully, Sadie placed a kiss on this spot. As Sadie backed away, she smiled, a reddish glow on Abigail's cheeks. "That makes you look like a hard crook."

"Maybe I am. Watch out."

"I want to see that," Sadie said, raising an eyebrow with a smile, before picking up the glasses and looking at Abigail mischievously. "Let's start with something simple." Sadie held her glass with the golden liquid in front of her face. Abigail studied her for a moment, then took the glass out of Sadie's hand. Grinning, Sadie nudged hers with Abigails, a clinking sound set the clash before Sadie sipped her drink and a sweetish taste settled on Sadie's tongue. Over the edge of the glass, Sadie watched Abigail, who, more cautiously than Sadie, brought the glass to her lips. But before Sadie could say something, Abigail threw her head back and emptied it in one blow. Somewhat surprised, Sadie gave her an impressed look. "Not bad."

Sadie could see that her reaction should say, I told you so, and it would have had the effect if Abigail hadn't started coughing in the next moment, as her liquor went down her throat. To suppress her laughter, Sadie faked a throat-clearing, but in the next instant, contrary to her actions, grew into a giggle.

When Abigail had calmed down, she straightened in front of Sadie and slapped her on the shoulder. "You don't have to laugh at me." Abigail said, folding her arms across her chest. In response, Sadie brought her glass to her mouth and, like Abigail before, tipped her down in one, whereupon she raised an eyebrow to prove it.

"Fine, I got it. Not everyone can be as tough as you are." Abigail emphasized the word "tough."

"You're pretty damn right, darling." Sadie licked her lip and revealed a teasing grin. Abigail grimaced and nodded ironically.

"Darling," she said pointedly, letting it pass on her tongue. "Why does this phrase seem so familiar to me?" Sadie shrugged her shoulders with a smile, the glass holding her face level and fixing Abigail before she set it down on the next vacant space.

"I don't know, Abigail," Sadie replied, turning to the woman in front of her who had never really taken her eyes off her.

"Oh, I'll help you. But only if you want, darling. Let me just remind you that my arguments are quick-witted and inescapable." Abigail used exactly the same words Sadie had pronounced a few days ago. Sadie bit her lip and hid her grin.

"Darling?" Sadie asked innocently.

"Go to sleep, Sadie, you already hear things." Abigail gave her a raised eyebrow.

"Maybe you're right. But..."

"No buts. I stay awake, I slept enough. Two days." Abigail took a step closer and put her hands around Sadie's arms. "Just lie down before you fall over." Sadie's lips were surrounded by a smile that did not want to go away. She liked this game.

"You alright?" There was concern in Sadie's voice.

"Just a headache." Abigail grimaced and rubbed her forehead. Then she looked Sadie in the face with her blue eyes and led her with a gentle grip on the wrist to the bed, to the edge of which she sat down. "You're still standing. Sit down with me," Abigail said, sliding sideways to give Sadie room. This time, the words were slightly different from those at the time. But the connection was the same.

A few seconds passed while Sadie just stood there and looked Abigail in the eye. This made no expression and let the spectacle upright. Meanwhile, Abigail's fingers slid off Sadie's wrist and found her hand. Her warm fingers and her thumb gently stroking Sadie's finger reminded Sadie that Abigail had said something. Without further hesitation, Sadie sat next to her, glancing down at their tangled hands, before she found Abigail's eyes beaming so clearly at her.

Slowly, Abigail removed her hand from Sadie's, took her face in both hands and looked softly into her eyes. Then she closed the distance and teased Sadie with lightly kisses. Sadie gripped Abigail's wrists and backed away only a few inches.

"What are we doing here?" Sadie whispered, her pupils jumping from left to right, trying to read from Abigails.

"I do not know." Abigail answered just as softly as Sadie, her eyes radiating pure heat for Sadie.

"Should we stop?" Abigail shook her head, her eyes glued to Sadie's, before Sadie let her lips run over Abigails. Quiet and careful, like the first time. Sadie still didn't know what they were doing there or what it meant. She just knew that she liked it, that she could forget and that she felt more alive, as ever. The tingling that ran through Sadie's body, the warmth she took and the incessant chills that shook her. It was invigorating. Something Sadie could only feel for a long time through nerve-wracking gunfights that had brought blood to her ears. Each detached shot, whether from its drum or that of the enemy, excited her heart rate in a pleasant way and flowed through it with sheer joy. Quite in comparison to what she felt now. Only tender, in no way rustic and hostile. Loving and warm and blue, like Abigail's eyes. Why she lost herself in this kiss.

Sadie tasted the sweet whiskey, on Abigail's sweeter lips, subtly wetted by it. Instantly, Sadie wondered if Abigail felt it too. Or if her lips were pure poison for Abigail. Did Sadie want to try it, did Sadie want to know? Everything in her screamed for a meaningful yes. So she opened her mouth and ran the tip of her tongue over Abigail's upper lip. For a second, Sadie had no choice but to worry and wait for Abigail to react. A second that was much more than a fraction of an instant. Sadie's heart jumped and her own mind whispered treacherously in her ear. 

Sadie opened her eyes, just for a moment, when she also met Abigail's, black pupils, circled by the blue swirl of irises that Sadie so loved to look at and had so often lost herself in them. This circumstance lasted only for a moment before they both closed their eyes and Sadie came in contact with Abigail's tongue. Almost cheeky, Abigail asked playfully for access. This made Sadie grin, with Abigail nipping on Sadie's lower lip and teasingly bit it, whereupon Sadie glared at her. Which didn't mean that she did not like it. Because she did.

Abigail just caught the glare and shrugged innocently with her eyebrows. Still in the same breath, Sadie tore Abigail's hands down and held her firmly. Their faces were less than an inch apart, and Sadie felt Abigail's warm breath on her skin. It felt as if before a big showdown with the opponents standing in front of each other with their hands over the grips of the revolver, ready to snap down at any moment, tensing the hammer lightning fast, and chasing the bullet out of the drum with a beguiling bang. Two challengers in the midst of a spectacle. Sadie could hear her pulse and believed to hear Abigail's at that moment, too. Although she was sure it could only be a sum of imagination. As Sadie's gaze wandered briefly to Abigail's lips and then back to her eyes, Sadie could see the smile forming on her lips. For a moment, Sadie thought she'd lost the game, Abigail's face betrayed it, and Sadie couldn't talk herself out of it, then Abigail's eyes flickered on Sadie's lips too, which made an even dirtier grin than Abigail could ever have.

If Abigail had her hands free, she would probably give her a little push, but instead Sadie felt the tension in her arms, but Sadie was stronger and held her in place. This earned Sadie a bad look, because this woman was anything but yielding.

"I think we are in a dead end," Sadie said. Because she was as willing to give in as Abigail. Which made Sadie think for the first time that the two of them tended to start silly games in present of the other that were difficult to end.

"I do not think so," Abigail replied, storming her lips tightly at Sadie's. Well, apparently there was a possibility. One that also appealed to Sadie. Without hesitating, Sadie met her kiss with as much temper as Abigail showed her. It was different than before. Less cautious approach, but an enraged fire that took possession of them and yet has always been inherent in them. At least that's how it was with Sadie and she knew that Abigail looked the same inside. She was sure. Although they brought out their feelings differently, but the flame lived not only in Sadie alone.

All that had happened stoked a fire in everyone, once made of pure embers, and grew into a sea of flames. With every day, every hour, every minute and every second, when it burned with bitter experiences, as well as the joy of something big or the cherished, little moments of life. That moment was something big. Everything bad hid far behind, not as usual. Where it was the other way round.

Sadie surrendered to the heated kisses until she noticed Abigail jerkily free herself from Sadie's loose grip. But before Sadie could act, and she wanted to, Abigail wrapped her arms around Sadie and and pressed against her as far as she could. Positively surprised, Sadie did the same. Granted, she would have expected something provocative. But that played in her hands.

Abigail's body heat, which Sadie herself felt through the wet, cold fabric of the clothes, made her feel alive. The soft, unbridled lips that kissed her passionately. The breath, which paced, her torso rhythmically pressed together, and ran hot into each other. Sadie felt alive. She almost meant, more alive than in the last months.

But the most important thing was that Sadie did not blame herself. Because that's what she was, innocent. As mentioned, it was months. And Jake, just as Sadie knew her Jake, he would have wanted her to be happy. Although Sadie never put the word happiness in her mouth, let alone put it that way. But what she would say is that she had a damn great time. Highs and lows. Above all, dedication and passion.

Abigail's hands retreated over Sadie's back, trailing the collar of her shirt, grabbing Sadie by it, and gently backing away so that she could lean her forehead against Sadie's. Slowly Sadie opened her eyes and saw Abigail's eyelashes open until she could see into her clear eyes. A soft smile appeared on Abigail's lips and was reflected on Sadie's next moment.

"We should rest," Abigail whispered, reading in Sadie's eyes, only lighted by the light of the candle, with dancing shadows on her face. Sadie's eyes darted to the scratch and carefully stroked it with her thumb before answering.

"Ain't we doing that?" Sadie replied with a grin. Abigail pulled tight at the collar, which was supposed to be a slap, while Sadie pursed her lips and stole a kiss. From a short distance, Sadie could witness a mature eye roll. Not a second later, the smile touched Abigail's lips again, which had never left Sadies.

"You're impossible."

"I know," Sadie sang back. Another few seconds elapsed in which they looked each other in the eye and tried to read something from each other. Until Abigail traightened Sadie's collar and slowly moved away. Sadie momentarily missed her embrace and the warmth she carried with her. Only now did she realize again that her clothes were still wet, whereupon an uninvited chill ran down her body.

"The room is rented over the night. Then tomorrow we can start bright and fresh," Abigail said and walked around the room with no target until she stood in front of Sadie and looked at her. "I don't have much money left ... But it should be enough for a decent meal." She bent her head from left to right. "Maybe a drink too," Abigail added. Then Sadie had to laugh, whereupon Abigail looked at her questioningly.

"What, is this going to be your new passion?" Sadie asked teasingly.

"No, I thought much more of you," Abigail replied, giving Sadie a look.

"Sounds good to me." Sadie winked at the dark-haired one, and Abigail stared back for a moment before she blushed and turned around just to keep her eyes on Sadie.

"You know that I meant it differently."

"Do I know that?" Abigail met Sadie with a look that clearly said, "Stop these games," and a grin on Sadie's face grew. "Abigail, Abigail, Abigail." Sadie said slowly and emphatically. "You make it too easy for me. Ain't you learned anything yet?" Abigail wrinkled her nose and raised her head.

"Nonetheless, the drink is for you," she said, ignoring Sadie.

"That's so nice of you, Abby." Simpered Sadie ironically.

"Come on, tell me what you want and I'll be right back." Sadie knew exactly what she wanted. No food, no drinking. Only Abigail in her arms, who was so lovely in front of her.

"Surprise me," she said instead, giving her a smile. Abigail looked as if she wanted to say something, but decided against it and walked backwards to the door.

"See you soon," she said, waving.

"I'm waiting here," Sadie replied, watching her until the door slammed shut, whereupon her eyes wandered around the room, staring holes in the air, accompanied by the candlelight and its shadow in the small room. The rain rustled behind closed windows and Sadie could hear the sky whine, still beating with lightning. But for Sadie it was unusually quiet in the four walls.

And for all she hold dear, Sadie did not know what it all meant and how it came about. How it was possible. As she sat there alone in the room, and had been alone for the first time ever since the events, it almost was too much and it unexpectedly laced her throat. As daring as Sadie was, so overwhelmed she was by the thought of what might happen. Far in the back of her head, a soft voice spoke to her, a dancing figure mocking Sadie. But before that omen could use Sadie's mind, Abigail's footsteps rang out, which Sadie could make out in silence.

Then the door opened, a creaking sounded, that clearly wasn't heard before, the light from the corridor and the room merging, and Abigail entered, under her the body's own shadow. Abigail carried a tray over her left arm and closed the door behind her before she put it down.

Curious, Sadie stretched out to catch what Abigail had brought with her and whether she had taken her taste. That didn't escape Abigail and a smile grew on her lips. She took one of the bowls and held it out to Sadie, who took it from her and inspected the dish. In the meantime, Abigail sat on the empty seat next to Sadie, as if she had never been away. Only when Sadie looked up, she realized that Abigail had washed her face and the graze in her face was no longer covered with dirt. On her cheekbone was the reddish glow of a fresh wound.

Then Sadie turned to her food, smoked meat with vegetable garnish, on which she had nothing to complain about.

Again and again Sadie looked over to Abigail and it was as if the charged storm air was in the room, filled it with electrifying pulses. Which only Sadie could feel. Just before a big bang, when the sky bursts, the rain fell to the ground, and lightning and thunder were not far away. A simple gut feeling.

After dinner, it was Abigail whose eyes occasionally went to Sadie's. But before she said anything, her eyes flew to an indeterminate point in the room, making Sadie more and more impatient each time. Abigail's nervous hand folding did not help Sadie either. Until she finally spit it out after what felt like eternity.

"Sadie," Abigail began, Sadie almost thought she had decided otherwise and wouldn't speak any further, when she pulled out an envelope that crackled under her touch, "would you read it to me?" Sadie was relieved when it finally was outside, so Abigail had unnecessarily stretched her to the torture. She had not noticed how tense she really was, and now smiled as she took a deep breath. Not only that, Sadie was pleased that Abigail asked her. It was just a small thing, but it means something to Sadie. Trust.

Sadie was relieved when it was finally out of her, so Abigail had unnecessarily drawn her to torture. She hadn't noticed how tense she really was, and now smiled as she took a deep breath. Not only that, Sadie was pleased that Abigail asked her. It was just a small thing, but it meant something to Sadie. Trust.

"Then give it to me," Sadie said casually and took the letter out of her hand, while both pairs of eyes met and Sadie gave Abigail a fleeting smile. Because Abigail certainly did not need to be ashamed.

The letter was sealed, Abigail hadn't opened it since she had picked it up. Carefully, Sadie opened it, unfolded the sheet of paper and cleared her throat before she read.

"Hey, Abby,  
do not worry, we are well. Jack is fine and he settled in here. He even found a few friends! Your message has made him very happy and he misses you. Who can blame him? His mom is the most important person in his life. But please do not worry too much. He is safe.

I was happy to hear from you and to be sure that you are well! It took a great load of my mind. Even if the circumstances, as you mentioned, are not the best. When were they ever?

If we meet, you have to tell me everything! Unbelievable that you met Charles!

And you probably will not believe me …" Sadie's eyes slid over the words and her heartbeat increased enormously. Her voice lost vigor and grew dimmer, as if she'd just been given bad news. "But I also received a surprise guest. Abigail, it's John! He lives and he is well!" Slowly, Sadie peeled her eyes from the piece of parchment and fixed Abigail. Her lips were half-open, her face showing the unexpected surprise, and Sadie felt Abigail's heart pounding. Because Sadie felt the same. There was a rebellion in her chest, throbbing, up to her palate, beating her body. Abigail's eyes went to Sadie's, both had to share the same look. Nevertheless, fundamentally different. Sadie saw Abigail gather, blink in disbelief, and closed her lips to swallow. She turned her eyes to the letter again and continued reading.

"Come visit us as soon as you can. We are waiting for you every day in the park at lunchtime. See you soon." Including Tilly's signature. Nothing felt more real at this moment. She would have liked to see Abigail's eyes to find answers. But all that was left of Sadie at that moment was to stare at the words that started shaking in her mind's eye. That's what it meant. A sudden end. Had Sadie been alone, she would have grunted, crumpling the letter and lighting it. But no, Sadie pulled herself together, she had learned what happened if she let her feelings run wild. Quite apart from that, Sadie did not want Abigail to see her like that and find out what it caused in her. A raging fire, as ever. Not one of those that revived her body in new ways. It was one of the old kind. Probably fueled by disappointment.

Then she felt a warm touch on her suddenly cold hands, clutching the paper, whose small, sweeping words had just changed everything.

"Was it from the beginning your plan to come to Rhodes, so we move to Saint Denis?" Asked Sadie, who suddenly became aware of all this. Her eyes fixed on the paper. One minute passed. But there was no answer. "You never intended to disappear into the swamps or mountains, did you?" Sadie felt the cold take over and Abigail's hand moved away from hers.

"Listen, I'm sorry. I just thought you would never let it happen. After all, we are wanted women! I could see how important my safety is to you and Jack. "Abigail put her hands to her face. "I miss him so much." And Sadie could tell from her voice that she was crying. But Sadie could not help wondering if she really meant Jack or not John. She knew for herself what a banal thought it was that wanted to cling to her and hold nothing but bitter darkness.

"I know," Sadie said, hugging her despite everything. Because it was Abigail. Damn, it was Abigail! None of that was her fault. Who could have guessed that everything was driving them in this direction? If it hadn't been the letter, then the time. At some point they would have come to Saint Denis and there would have waited the evil surprise. Sadie cursed herself for seeing a wonderful message as an evil. But that's what it looked like in her. It was as if everything that was being rebuilt would collapse. To dust and ashes.

That being said, Sadie had known it better in-depth. Still, she had pushed herself to think of what should not be. Unmissable as it was and Sadie now caught up with all her strength. She felt like an idiot. Abigail's hair brushed her cheek, reminding her of other days, as her warm arms wrapped around Sadie's body and even gave her in this situation hold. That warmth, it meant more to Sadie than she could have guessed.

Soft sobbing touched her ears and Sadie gently stroked Abigail's back, which trembled under her hand. Slowly Abigail broke from Sadie's embrace, her head rising until she was on par with Sadie.

"I didn't want to hurt you. I'm sorry, Sadie.", she said quietly, her voice fragile. Sadie had been hurt. It hurt to know that Abigail thought her so incoherent. Even if that was exactly the case. Safety was paramount, nothing else. But Sadie wanted Abigail to know she could talk to her. No matter what. Everything else was unimportant.

"It's okay," Sadie said. Also, if it was anything but okay around them. What Abigail felt, she understood. Nothing could change that. It was strangely okay. "Please know you can talk to me," Sadie added. It was important to her that Abigail knew this. Sadie looked into those wonderful blue eyes, which enchanted her to a new one and tried to read from them. Abigail nodded to her honestly. She could see it in the glint in Abigail's eyes.

Hazy, Sadie lowered her eyes and dropped them on her hands. Once again, Sadie wondered how they had landed in this situation. And she knew that it couldn't have changed anything. Then she felt again Abigail's fingers closing on her hand. Her eyes lifted and Sadie's gaze was received by Abigail.

"I don't want to lose you." Abigail looked steadfastly at Sadie, sincerely, eyes spoke of a loss she didn't want to experience. "You will leave me. I know it."

"Don't say something like that. I'll always stay by your side." Sadie pulled Abigail into a deep hug to express her words. Show her what it meant. To look Abigail in the eye, Sadie pulled her head back just enough that she could. Pure blue eyes shimmered toward her. Carefully, Sadie took Abigail's face in her hands and shyly put her lips on hers. Immediately, it was returned and Sadie gave her one more. And one more. Then she stroked gently on Abigail's cheek, down to the chin and gave this a gentle nudge. "I like you too much for that," she said, giving Abigail a sad smile. "Apart from that, there is a lot to catch up with. You remember? I wanted to teach Jack to smoke. "Abigail started to laugh and gave Sadie a smack on the shoulder.

"I'll warn you if I catch you, then ..."

"What then?" Abigail's eyes lit up before she dropped her head undecided, a faint smile on her face, and the subject was over. "I'm looking forward to seeing John," Sadie said. And she meant it, really. "He's got to tell me how he got away from his lunatic this time. The guy does something damn right." There was a brief silence, and Sadie wondered if Abigail would answer.

"Yes," she replied and fell into a silence, her eyes running over Sadie's face. "I always wonder where he got his luck from." No matter how happy Abigail was, she hid it from Sadie.

At that moment, Sadie would have liked to suggest Abigail to run away with her and leave everything else behind. Only the two. A wild reverie. Because reality hid much more than that. A loving mother who missed her son. A loving woman who missed her husband. Her family. Sadie was not part of it. Even if Abigail and John would tell her otherwise. Sadie was the last to stand or push between people. Quite unlike Uncle, the old good-for-nothing. Sadie looked at the woman in front of her, let her eyes jump over Abigail's face and became aware of why she liked her so much.

"Let's go to sleep and leave early tomorrow morning. Then, as described in the letter, we will be in Saint Denis at lunchtime." Sadie gave her a sincere smile. Abigail's only response was a tired nod. Then they went to bed. The raging thunderstorm had long since been forgotten and drowned out, from her own storm of emotions.

Sadie slept restless that night. Every time she started to turn, Sadie felt Abigail's gentle grip on her body and dropped into her protective embrace. It was ironic that it was precisely this woman who ensured peace in her mind, even if she was responsible for the chaos.


	13. Don't You Forget About Me

It was the next morning, the fresh air, that animated Sadie's senses. Nothing had changed. But she felt stronger than before, even when the night was anything but restful. The streets spoke of the storm of the past day, large puddles formed on the paths, made a squishy noise as soon as they stepped off the wooden deck, and clung to Sadie's soles.

Raindrops pearled on the saddles and vaguely reflected the light of the rising sun. Sadie's eyes focused on Abigail, a silent question as to whether she was ready. Abigail looked back for a second and stood there in front of the horses until she pulled herself up on the saddle horn and watched Sadie from Bob's back. Without hesitating, Sadie immediately followed her and took lead, to east. To Saint Denis. Where Tilly, Jack and John would wait for them. Not realizing that it would be time today and they would actually see Abigail and Sadie.

Sadie did not have much to say. At least that's what she said to herself. Actually, there was so much she wanted to tell Abigail. Just could not. How could she? The journey was over, Sadie felt it. Sadie knew it. Every word that would have left her mouth, she didn't want to burden Abigail. And that would have been it. Pure load. Abigail didn't deserve the pain. So she had enough to fight already.

The unfamiliar silence weighed on Sadie's ears and all she could do was slip into her own evil thoughts. She wondered what Abigail had to think. Apart from her anticipation for Jack and John. She couldn't miss what happened there. Sadie couldn't be the only one who felt it. No matter what, it not only sealed Sadie's mouth.

After a while, Sadie focused on the rhythmic tramp of the hooves, which soon became nothing more than a soft thump in the back of her head. The force with which she was drawn into her thoughts was stronger than Sadie herself.

When she saw the cloud of smoke of the industrial city on the horizon, Sadie became sick in the stomach. When had she last had a stomach leak? Hell, Sadie couldn't tell.

Then it was the clacking of hooves on paving stones that counted down like a countdown. Before Sadie knew it, they were standing in front of the park and she pulled on the reins of her horse to stop. The gray facades of the city looked more desolate than usual, and the trees in the park, like the green bushes, with the otherwise pretty flowers, were too glaring.

Almost lost, Sadie let the countenance of the city sink in and let her eyes glide over the action, which was nothing but a huge act. In the background the church bells sounded softly and made its way through the meanwhile busy streets. Sadie got off Arthur and suddenly had the feeling that she wanted to get over it quickly. Before Sadie walked into the park, she glanced around for Abigail, who crept behind her and stopped in her track. Now she stood there in front of Sadie and didn't move, her hands clasped in front of her body and an uncertain look on her face.

"What if ... when they're not there?" Abigail's eyes shifted restlessly over the crowded streets of the gray-looking city. "I mean, the letter is a few days old and-"

"Abigail," Sadie interrupted her and took a step towards her, "don't worry, they will be there. And they will wait for us." They will wait for you, Sadie thought. She wanted to take Abigail's face in her hands, one last time to look deep into her eyes. Instead, Sadie's arms fell loosely down her body. Suddenly she had a desire to do something with her hands and clawed it to her belt.

"There they are!" It was the voice of a little boy who could not be more excited. Then Sadie's head shot in the direction of the voice. Brown hair covering the boy's forehead, bobbing to the beat of his step as he walked, and the happiest face Sadie had ever seen. It was little Jack, who came running with a huge grin. Not far behind, Tilly and ... Where was John? It would be too much to say that it took a great load of Sadie's mind, yet she felt something of a relief. So Sadie had more time to brace herself.

Sadie's eyes fell on Abigail, whose grin went with Jacks, and she took the last few steps before she hugged Jack tightly and laughed.

"Mom, I missed you so much," the boy said and Abigail gently stroked his head.

"I missed you too. You don't believe how much." Sadie could see her happiness, she was beaming all over her face. Something that Sadie had missed a lot. Because this boy was part of her. Now Abigail was whole again and it got to Sadie's heart. It was this day that she wanted to witness and that had given her the strength to survive it all.

She placed many small kisses on her son, who laughingly underwent the procedure before Abigail was even in a position to break away from him. If only it were centimeters. Smiling, Sadie watched, before her eyes found Tilly.

"Nice to see you, Tilly," Sadie said, squeezing her shoulder. This gave her an amusing smile.

"I'm glad to see you. Well and healthy. "

"Tilly, I don't know how to thank you." In the meantime, Abigail had straightened up and stood with them, Jack in front of her and a protective grip on his shoulders. Again and again he smiled up at her.

"You don't need to thank me. We were a family. We still are." Nodding, Abigail smiled at Tilly, still overwhelmed with holding her son undamaged in her arms before she slid her hand down her face and blinked away her tears. How Sadie would have liked to hug her.

"You're probably wondering where John is. Shall we?" Tilly's facial expressions revealed that they would find out right away. Abigail and Sadie shared a look before moving and following Tilly.

\--

Her path took her to the eastern end of Saint Denis. Smaller houses, poorer people. But the perfect place to stay undiscovered. In addition, Sadie had never been a fan of big and pretentious. Small and comfortable meets her needs.

Tilly directed them through a few houses until she came to a stop. She opened the door and Jack was the first to run in, even before the door was properly open. With a wave of her hand, Tilly indicated that they should enter. Right behind Abigail, Sadie passed the threshold.

The walls were a dark shade of wood, and the narrow hallway was set against a large room, probably the living room. Where they were now. At a table with chairs all around, Jack found himself in front of a stooped person who had his eyes on the table surface and devoted attention to a brochure, or something obvious.

Jack pulled at his sleeve until he looked up. Sadie could guess he was about to say something that Jack should stop and leave him alone. Then his eyes met the guests. Abigail and Sadie standing in the middle of the room, and Tilly, standing between them. He looked exactly the way Sadie must have looked when she read the letter. Then the initial shock and tension vanished from his face, a grateful expression over his features.

"You're well," he said, Sadie could feel the relief, and got to his feet. The chair slid backwards and scratched the floor. John found Abigail and took her in his arms. His hand moved over her cheek, he clearly saw the scratch, but said nothing before kissing her on the forehead. With a strange feeling, Sadie turned her eyes away. Suddenly she felt her body give way and she was in the firm grip of a man who gave her a hug, a tight hug.

"You know you want one, Sadie," he said between laughter. Sadie tried to say something, but her words were smothered on John's chest and submerged. Briefly, she fraternally patted him on the back to approximate a hug approach, before she put more strength in her punches, until he let off and looked at her amused.

"If that's no welcome back," Tilly spoke up, and Sadie could no longer hide her smile. She was right.

Meanwhile, Abigail found Sadie and put her hand on her arm. A familiar feeling that at that moment felt anything but like that. Nevertheless, Sadie returned her smile. Abigail's eyes were so pure and shone for her.

"I see you have a lot to tell." She heard John say and Sadie was about to jump back out of Abigail's immediate closeness, which despite everything hadn't lost its value, and felt caught. Sadie looked up and saw John fixing Abigail, his hand on her cheek where Abigail's bruise was. Relieved, Sadie let out a breath, whereupon Abigail glanced at her.

Abigail scanned John, but found no evidence of an incident. John noticed this and gave her a flirty smile.

"I also have a lot to tell. Only I have to disappoint you, I don't carry a war injury this time."

"That ain't bad. I've had enough for all of us." Sadie interjected, thinking of her bullet wound, the nasty impact with her left arm, the fall of the horse, and the inflammation that attacked her. The list was clearly long.

John licked his teeth, then turned to Tilly. "You make some of that yummy tea?" His eyes looked pleadingly at her. Tilly held his gaze until she finally gave in.

"Alright, I'll do it," she said. "I don't know how you can handle him, Abigail. This has been going the last days like that. Nonsense, what am I talking about? Since he's here." Abigail laughed and Sadie let out a throaty laugh. "Will you help me, Jack?" Tilly asked the boy, whose eyes lit up and in the next moment he jumped vividly to his feet. Three pairs of eyes followed them until they disappeared into the kitchen.

"Now that's settled, sit down, ladies." John clapped his hands. "Then, as soon as Tilly returns, let's share our stories," he said, sitting down at the table.

\--

"He didn't come back. He probably told you exactly that."

"Why doesn't it surprise me?" Sadie probably would have been more surprised if he had really tried to rescue John, bastard. "What about your shoulder?" Sadie asked, with the incident in mind and how John hurled from the wagon. As painful as it must have been, Sadie knew it was very painful, and then paired with the fall of the train, so much it had ultimately saved John's life. The army had paid no attention to his lifeless body as John escaped. A guy of luck. John was the only reason that could convince Sadie that there was such a thing as luck. And Sadie was sure that there was no thing like luck. But this guy always showed her the opposite.

"Can't complain," he replied with a look around the table, his eyes pausing briefly on Abigail. "Not only is Tilly an excellent cook, she has also helped me maintain the injury." He smiled thankfully at her, which was returned by Tilly.

Sadie laughed and all eyes landed on her. She raised her eyebrows. "What?" With a wry smile, Sadie looked at the group.

"Why are you laughing?" Abigail was the one who said it aloud.

"I was not allowed to enjoy your cooking skills, Abigail, but parallels are there." John looked up, eyebrows raised, "She's done everything to get me back on my feet," Sadie said.

"Without chewing your ear?" He wanted to know and seemed baffled.

"John!"

"Not a bit.", Sadie smiled, thinking in the several times where Abigail had helped her with the bullet wound. And not only there. It was so much more.

"Then I have to believe you," John gave in.

"Hey, you're the one who always made that a procedure," Abigail complained, crossing her arms. Sadie vaguely remembered back to Colter sheltering herself from the cold in a small hut. The fire crackled in the fireplace, but the cold was biting. Not that Sadie had cared at the moment. The loss of her husband was very fresh at the time. Then there was John, tracked down by Arthur and Javier, somewhere beyond the Black Stump of Ambarino and dying. The men had been able to get him to Colter, but his condition spoke for itself. Abigail and John had argued a lot. Sadie heard how annoyed they were from each other, but love was definitely the spur for all this. Abigail barely left his side. No matter how much John wanted it.

John turned up his nose and Sadie's eyes studied the long cuts across his distinctive face. But before he could open his mouth, Tilly intervened.

"Nice to see that we're all together and we love each other." She eyed John and Abigail with a meaningful look, both of whom dropped their shoulders.

"You're right," Abigail agreed, turning to John, who gave her a soft smile that was immediately returned by her, and Tilly nodded in satisfaction, showing her gleaming white teeth as she caught Sadie's gaze, who nodded to her admiringly.

"Now that we have clarified that, how was your trip?" Tilly folded her hands on the table in front of her and looked curiously at the other two women in turn.

Then it were Abigail and Sadie who told their story and reviewed everything. Sadie felt the relief deep inside her that it was all over and they finally had a break. Even if their heads were still exposed to a prize money, they could feel peace. Also, when the time was up with Abigail and it was the most beautiful that Sadie had been able to experience for a long time. Because that's how she would remember it. As something beautiful.

She was just glad that Abigail had her family together, a wish that Sadie supported. That's what Sadie wanted. That Abigail could be with her family.

Part of her, would always want to have Abigail with her, just for herself and no one else. So it had been Abigail, bringing her the missing lack of warmth. Heat that Sadie didn't want from anyone else. Except Abigail. Sadie had experienced it. That was more what she could ask for. Now it was time to let go. Sadie knew that. She had been preparing for that since she had read the lines in the letter. Nothing else.

"Mh, the tea is really good.", Sadie praised when the tea was finally ready and after a few minutes cooling drinkable. 

"Didn't I say?" John grinned and put his hand on the top of Sadie's armrest. Sadie nodded approvingly. As she took another sip, she looked over the edge of the cup and over to Abigail, who held the cup in both hands and blew straight into the drink, before she took a gulp carefully. Everyone was watching Abigail.

"Tilly, that tastes great," she said after a few seconds.

"Thanks." Tilly was extremely flattered by all the compliments.

"No, seriously, you have to give me the recipe."

"If you like." She looked surprised that the three had succumbed so much to her tea.

"Absolutely, Tilly." Abigail smelled the tea and took another sip. "Really good."

"Maybe your wonder-tea will replace her morning coffee, who knows." Sadie grinned in Abigail's direction.

"I wouldn't go so far. But qualities certainly exist," Abigail answered with a wink.

"Better not. Her coffee made her bearable." John mimicked an exaggerated shudder and laughed." Abigail rolled her eyes. Sadie smiled, and everything seemed to be the same again.

The day turned out to be an extraordinary day. The hours flew by, Sadie was amazed that her butt didn't hurt from sitting. But her stomach hurt from laughter. Yes, they all had a lot to talk about, to laugh and also to mourn. They talked about the good old days. About anyone who had to leave the gang. About everyone who left the gang. And what was now to come.

"What are you going to do?" Tilly looked around the room, Abigail and John sharing a look, Sadie sitting in her chair, arms and feet casually crossed, for a moment Abigail caught her eyes before loosening again. "If it's for me, you can stay here. I am happy about company. Besides, I will not see Daniel again until he's back from his love-journey." Tilly smiled to herself, We've got the cabin for ourselves for this time. It ain't much. But something."

"We should not be a burden to you any longer than necessary." Abigail said, placing a hand on Tilly's wrist.

"Impossible, you are no burden." Tilly looked truly shocked.

"Thanks, Tilly," John replied and Abigail nodded in agreement, "but that does not change the fact that we're wanted criminals, the Pinkertons will probably be looking for us for quite a while." John paused and chewed on his lower lip. "No, we'll leave you." He looked at Abigail for her objections, "For your safety, Tilly, and Jack's."

Sadie watched as Abigail took a breath and a touched smile appeared on her face. Tilly nodding knowingly.

"What's with you, Sadie?" Tilly asked Sadie. Slightly surprised Sadie raised her eyebrows, she hadn't expected to be asked.

"I haven't thought about that yet." Sadie answered truthfully.

"What's for the two of them," Tilly gestured to Abigail and John, "that's the same for you, you know?"

Sadie nodded her thanks. "I know." Pause. She struggled the urge to find Abigail's eyes, "I'll think it over." Sadie finally said, smiling briefly in Tilly's direction. Her eyes met Abigails.

Her otherwise glittering eyes had given way to a dull Matt. Only Sadie saw it. Because for John, the shine was present. Sadie released her pupils from the dark-haired and looked at the dark wood of the table. Small fine scratches covered it. Many small scars.

Suddenly it seemed quiet around the little table. After a while Sadie dared to look up and let her eyes wander over their faces.

"So how did Jack keep you busy?" Sadie asked Tilly.

Tilly buried her face in her hands.

"Don't ask," she said, and Abigail was the first to start laughing, and shortly afterwards John, Tilly, and Sadie joined in.

Thus, the conversation quickly found new appeal and switched to happier topics. Sadie was the last one who wanted to spend the day of reunion with her comrades or friends ... her family in gloomy silence. This day should be remembered. For a nice reunion.

Then the evening came and soon gave way to the night. Tilly couldn't offer them much. Another room was still available. At least it provided enough space for a spread out mattress that served as a bed. Sadie couldn't complain. A roof over her head was more than she could ask for. She also loved the floor. Nothing to complain about. As mentioned, Sadie was a simple woman.

Only, she missed Abigail. Sadie had forgotten what it was like to sleep alone. No one lay beside her, the room was empty of bodies. Only Sadie and the four walls, a tapestry that adorned it. The furniture. Not more. She heard her breath in silence and wished it was Abigails who she quietly listened to fall asleep. At some point Sadie had finally managed to fall asleep.

That went on for a few days. One night she felt as if the door opened silently, Sadie always kept it closed. There was a barely audible creak that could be heard every time the door opened. Sadie had paid attention. Her eyes opened to slits, if she felt something, then that she was wide awake. The wall was wrapped in a single shadow and told her nothing about a newcomer. Sadie's first thought was Abigail. How she wanted it to be Abigail!

When Sadie could stand it no longer, she turned on her back, raised her head and stared at the door. Secret silence and suffocating blackness. It was her mind that must have played a trick on Sadie. Sighing, Sadie dropped back with a dull sound. Damn crap.

\-- 

The following morning, it was still dark outside, distant street lights shining through the dirty window, bathing the room in bizarre shadows. Silently Sadie put on her boots. It was unusual, because otherwise she slept in full gear. But in the last few days, Sadie wanted to feel at home or at least try. Nothing helped. This place was not her home and would never be her home. There was no home for Sadie.

Softly, Sadie closed the door behind her. Everything was dimmed in silence. Her footsteps led her to a side alley that was located at the house and provided a larger, fenced area. She went first to Arthur, ran her hand over his fur until she stopped in front of him. Sadie stroked him gently and looked at him with tired eyes. This horse meant something to her. He had become very dear to her in the last weeks. Another companion on this goddamn earth.

"Be a good boy, yes?" She whispered to him. "Show them what a great friend you are." Sadie gave him a peck on the muzzle. "And ain't be so hard on Abigail." Then, with a heavy heart, turned away from his shiny wider eyes. She then went to Bob, circling him and looking at his features. A smile settled on Sadie's lips.

She was about to check the saddlebag when it caught her eye. Slowly she released it from her saddle and inspected the hat in her hands. Then she put it on her head, felt that feeling of carrying something on her head again. And it was perfect. But ... How could Abigail know ...? Smiling, Sadie shook her head. This woman actually knew her. Even against her words, not to leave Abigail, and yet Abigail gave her a hat. A small gesture that got deep into Sadie.

When Sadie was ready, she hopped on Bob's back.

"You ready, my boy? Back to old times." A snort escaped Bob's nostrils, which Sadie classified as a yes. Then she got him to move. On and on, until she left the city behind, and nothing more than the dark clouds of smoke were left to see behind her. Saint Denis. A city Sadie wasn't fond of. In whose walls she left Abigail, Tilly, Jack and John behind. A part of her life that had just ended. Goodbye forever.

Blue eyes went through her inner eye and left a pleasant shiver on her back. Sadie nudged her hat and a smile courted her lips. What a story.


	14. Epilogue

Abigail could not have imagined anything better in her life than the quiet life on a farm. Her own farm! It was a long way to get there. Many shootings, many deaths and a lot of vital force. But who was she to complain? Life could have meant worse to her. But they had their son, who grew up well and well educated. He even taught her how to read! So Abigail couldn't only play the piano when it was boring again, but grab a book. And these stories sometimes had it in them. Unbelievable, what you could take from such a book and the imagination these people carried with them!

After many years had passed, in which even once Sadie had showed up, it had become quiet. Sadie and John got their revenge on Micah. It was over. Finally over. Abigail was so angry when John left. How could Sadie put such fuss in his head? No, it wasn't her fault. Abigail knew that. Sadie had been looking for support. John was the man who had loved Arthur a lot and wanted to see that bastard fall out of his own hand. But Abigail was afraid. The news she could get. That Charles and Sadie would come back without him. Or John without Charles or .. Sadie.

To Abigail's luck, they came home. A great load fell of her mind. Because the days alone on the ranch, with Jack and Uncle, were hell. The ignorance. And Uncle. He was an annoying old guy. Barely bareble.

After the arrival of the three, John and Abigail had married. Now she was Mrs. Marston. This guy had behaved strangely on the day of the proposal. With that Abigail would tease him again and again. Something she had laughingly told her friends on the wedding day.

It was .. unfamiliar to see Sadie again. That did not diminish the joy. This woman had been a big part of her life. They had gone through so much together. Sadie had made her forget her worst time. How had she done that? Her concern for Jack and John was strong, even deafening. Maybe it was the circumstances of being on the run and having to keep moving without rest. Not to mention the weather in Ambarino. Abigail was glad when they had left that behind. But was there any possibility that more than the circumstances had Abigail tied to Sadie?

She could not say how many times she had thought of Sadie and what it all meant. Something she would never find out. With that, Abigail found acceptance. What else was left for her? She loved John and she loved Jack. Her family. Sadie was simply in between. Abigail never wanted to let her go. It was the best way. Abigail knew that. Sadie knew that. Then one day she was gone. And when she came back seven years later, she still wore the hat Abigail had hung on her saddlebag. Besides the joy of seeing Sadie again, a knowing smile stole across her face. It meant a lot to Abigail. And Sadie could see it. Abigail saw it.

Until Sadie disappeared again. With vague plans to travel to South America. Abigail didn't know where Sadie ended up going. She only hoped that Sadie was well and would not suffer the pain of her inner demons.

Otherwise, Abigail had a lot of work to do on the ranch. From time to time they even got visited by Tilly and her husband. John had met her in Saint Denis. From this time on, she regularly exchanged letters with Abigail. Abigail had learned that Tilly was in correspondence with Mary-Beth and had immediately asked for her address to possibly write her. What she had done. It was nice to be able to talk to the two women. Where they had belonged to their everyday life. Not everything that Abigail once knew was lost. Even Charles often showed up. He and John had established a real men friendship that made Abigail smile every time she saw them together.

It was usually quiet at the ranch, unless Uncle had downed too much liquor, something Abigail had longed for. She had found a new life with John. Something that should not last long.

The events came into effect like a clockwork. A wheel that broke into another and triggered a local chain reaction. The dead of Micah. Dutch, who was still alive. As well as some other gang members from back then. The government that was after them. John, who finally had to serve. Abigail's worst fears came true, caught up with her, not just in her many nightmares. Really this time and it was more than real.

Edgar Ross and his henchmen, lousy pigs abducting Abigail and Jack to pressure John. So that he would kill any living man of the former Van-Der-Linde Gang. What he did eventually.

But that was not it. Edgar Ross went to the ranch once more. Abigail was not allowed to lead a peaceful life. This life was not intended.

Uncle was the first one to catch it. Abigail would never have thought to see the old man die. He just existed and was always there. Until the bullet got him. John, Jack and Abigail had managed to flee to the barn. There were just too many. And they wanted John. He took it on with them. Then it was just shots that Abigail heard. Like hail, it drummed around them. Deafening loud. When the last shots echoed in her ears, it was night. Abigail had not been able to move for a long time, Jack the whole time next to her. Until she dared to go out.

\--

Abigail found herself in front of John's grave, which she visited every day. No day went by when she wasn't there. Jack usually joined her. Not today. But it was alright, Abigail was glad the boy was doing something different than reading or feeling like he needed to take care of his mother. Because that was not necessary. Abigail was a strong woman. Without her, this ranch wouldn't work anymore. But she did her best to look after her son and herself. That worked pretty well. She was proud of her work and especially what John had created there. With bare hands. And the help of a friend. Charles.

As Abigail lost herself in her thoughts, she went down to the house. It was so peaceful. The sun was high in the sky and sprayed her warmth. Abigail loved the sunbeams on her skin as they shimmered and tickled.

Nevertheless, she did 't come around for the upcoming chores. That's what she did next. When she was suddenly interrupted. Abigail's steps led her to the door. She opened the door.

It was the hat that made her heart leap, she would recognize it everywhere. A smile sneak up to her lips.

"Hey, Abigail."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to all who have followed this story. I know there are certainly many mistakes inside, the greater my thanks that it did not scare you! I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I did writing. :)


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